Whats a good funny quote?

Question

something i can put on my myspace?

Answer 1

william beckett

(lead singer for the band "the academy is"

quote:

"is it just me or has the catholic church become a whole lot sexier?

Answer 2

"It is wonderful to observe the calm confidence of a Christian with four aces."  Mark Twain

You might find some other quotes on the quotations page at www.alternativeeducationbible.com  that might make you laugh.  I believe they also take submissions from people around the country, so you might also send them some of your favorite quotes, too.

Answer 3

"sh it happens"

Answer 4

I like pigs. Dogs look up at us, cats look down at us but pigs treat us as equals.

-Winston Churchill

I may be dunk ma'ma but in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly.

- Winston Churchill

They're my fav's :P

Answer 5

" anybody else wanna feel my weebox in their grapes"-stewie from family guy

XD

orrr.

"look at that side boob,

look at this side boob,

oh yeah look at this side boob

does that turn you on? well it shouldnt coz that's my side boob."- PETER from family guy.

helpness

-Delilah Damage! x<3

Answer 6

"If I had nine of my fingers missing I wouldn't type any slower." - Mitch Hedberg

"I idolized Superman when I was younger. I thought he and I had a lot in common. He was always going into phone booths and taking off all his clothes." - Woody Allen

"Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society." - Mark Twain

"I believe that s*x is the most beautiful, natural, and wholesome thing that money can buy." - Steve Martin

"I think the worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of charades…or a game of fake heart attack." - Demetri Martin

"If trees could scream, would we be so cavalier about cutting them down?  We might, if they screamed all the time, and for no good reason." - Jack Handy (Deep Thoughts)

"Weaseling out of things is important to learn! It's what separates us from the animals -except the weasel." - Homer Simpson

"What year did Jesus think it was?" - George Carlin

"If God did not intend for us to eat animals, why did He make them out of meat?" - Unknown

Answer 7

How about:

"Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings."--Louis Hector Berlioz

"Men are like parking spots, the good ones are taken and the free ones are handicapped." and finally,

"Girls are like phones. We love to be held, talked too but if you press the wrong button you'll be disconnected!"