Whats "Love" got to do with it? What R your thoughts Women? Men your advice highly encouraged?

Question

Should a woman stay with a man because of Love and Marriage?

I've seen instances where women put up with men who don't have jobs, don't pay any bills, cheats, lies, abuses, etc; but the woman doesn't leave because she loves him and they have been married for many years (vows: through thick and thin/standing by his side). I guess they feel like they've invested so much time into the marriage and staying with the man is required! So my question is do you think the woman should stay with him dependent on the fact that they are married or because she truly loves him?

Answer 1

Cheating, lies and other types of abuse are not the types of behaviors that rational women would love or put up with. The type of women who stay with men through this kind of c**p are likely suffering from low self esteem or the false idea that her love with 'fix' the problem. These women are wrong.

As for not having a job or paying bills, well so many women choose to stay at home and not work and we're not asking men why they choose to put up with that, so can we really blame men who decide to stay at home? It is not specifically the male role to provide. Of course and ideally all adults should have a career and an income, but this ideal is sometimes not possible. It is not a reason to think of a man as less of a man, but perhaps just as one might think of wives that stay at home, a bit of a user, a poor role model for children etc. or making that 'choice' or unable. Therefore careful evaluation of the unemployed situation must be made in order to decide of staying with him (or her) is worth it.

Answer 2

Love is what gets us to marriage but love is not enough to keep a person there. If a person can not contribute to the relationship then it makes life very miserable. If women stay when they are being abused for the excuse of love, they don't know what love really is. Love would never abuse or make a person feel unvalued or worthless.  

Answer 3

All I can say is that woman who stay are not staying because they love them so much they stay because they are afraid of the unknown. No they shouldn't stay with a man who cares little about the woman who he is suppose to love and protect and take care off.

So to your question i say that a woman should tally up her losses, which by the way should have been done years ago, and move on to fulfill her life with out the weight of her husband keeping her boat in one place and collecting barnacles.

Answer 4

i think the lesson is people should think and think and think a lot first before they marry they're bf/gf.

If they fear God, they should not leave their husbands whatever happens because simply because DIVORCE IS AGAINST GOD'S WILL. Couples should try to fix things and bring back their relationship just like thetimes they were married..

Answer 5

This is the though from a man

Married is a big investment and i don't mean financially.

To be able for the married to work is need the effort from husband and wife. It is great if the woman decide to stay by her man, but her man should stand by her woman too.

I don't' wear your shoes so i don't know how it feel every time taking a walk. But if you really want to keep holding on and make the married last than you should looking into married counseling.

If  you have already been there and it is doesn't help than it is time you should sit down and make plan for your life.

Life is fragile and short so you should continue to take abusive as 24/7

To me if a man live in the house with the woman and doing nothing beside having s*x with her than i would say he is her toy boy.

If he starting mentally or physically abuse her than i would say he is one of the manufacture defective toy.

Do you like to have a toy boy in the house? would you like to keep a defective toy in the house?

i understand you are upset but i wish that you still can be calm, cool, and nice. and good luck with your decision

Answer 6

Love isn't everything.

In a marraige, you are supposed to stay together through thick and thin but if a man isn't holding up his end of the bargain and doesn't want to work and provide for his family, then it's time to get the show on the road.

I don't think any woman should stick around with a deadbeat. Married or not.  

Answer 7

This should definitely go two ways. Women also do all those things, it is not just men. If either...I just checked your question again, not really worth answering.

Answer 8

For you to be asking this question regarding marriage, you are obviously not married. Marriage is not just about time investment.  Most people made a promise not only to their partner, but also to God when they got married.  It's not as simple as you think.

As far as love, no, that is not a good enough reason to stay with someone.  

Answer 9

I think that the decision to stay in a bad marriage is a personal one, and since were not in their shoes, we cant judge what they want to do. I personally think that its a waste of time to stay with a man who doesnt work or is abusive, but at the same time I can almost see why some women would put up with it, and there are a LOT of reasons why, and its different for everyone. At times I just want to take these women and shake them because I see the hurt on their faces, but they allow themselves to be subjected to it, but Im not in their place, so I cant judge what theyre doing.  

Answer 10

He took the same vows.  If he is cheating, lying and abusing - he is not sticking to his vows - why should she?

Answer 11

yea women are more tolerant i would say.the man also gave the same vows before god at marriage but some how a man in such a situation always does not want to stick on to the wife

Answer 12

Often, the real reason is that being the responsible one in the marriage makes someone feel like they are of value. It's using someone else to make them feel good about themselves. It's a lousy way to be, because it doesn't really make them feel good, and it doesn't do anything to motivate the other to straighten up. Self-image thing. Real common, but lousy.  

Answer 13

go while you can.  go and do not stay.  go in the morning and do not let the night sink in your thoughts.

leave in the am.  go and go quickly.  

to seek and to find is determined by the time you take when you let go and begin to find one that can take care of you.  

dont lose tooo much time on one that does not rise early.  for his ways are wicked and slothful.  Poverty roams about his presence.  

Answer 14

It all depends on what the woman is in the marriage for..... Some women get married just to create a bussiness deal , then when the money gets short and things get rough they tend to break off the marriage .. Women and men have the possibility of cheating as well and when that happens you know what comes next.....So, it all depends on what each of them are really in the marriage for. If they really love each other they will work it out... One's problem in a marriage becomes the other's as well.  

Dezzy....neither should a man when the woman is the deadbeat.