Whats the funniest joke?

Question

Funniest one wins!

Answer 1

This young man comes home from Ranger school, and tells his dad about what they had him do.

"they tried to make me jump out of an air plane !! but i looked out the door and knew there was no way i would do it!!"

"then my drill sargeant came up to me and said if i didn't jump, he was gonna stick his baton up my hind end!!!"

his dad asked him, "did you jump?"

"A little at first!!"

and my other joke is:

What did cinderella do when she got to the ball?

CHOKED!!

Answer 2

Rated G

What did sushi A say to sushi B?

Wassabe!

Answer 3

Little Johnny came home from school one day and said to his father, "Dad, what can you tell me about politics? I have to learn about it for school tomorrow."

The father thought some and said, "Okay, son, the best way I can describe politics is to use an analogy. Let’s say that I’m capitalism because I’m the breadwinner. Your mother will be government because she controls everything, our maid will be the working class because she works for us, you will be the people because you answer to us, and your baby brother will be the future. Does that help any?"

Little Johnny said, "Well, Dad, I don’t know, but I’ll think about what you said."

Later that night, after everyone had gone to bed, Johnny was woken up by his brother’s crying. Upon further investigation, he found a dirty diaper.

So, he went down the hall to his parent’s bedroom and found his father’s side of the bed empty and his mother wouldn’t wake up. Then he saw a light on in the guest room down the hall, and when he reached the door, he saw through the crack that his father was in bed with the maid. Because he couldn’t do anything else, he turned and went back to bed.

The next morning, he said to his father at the breakfast table, "Dad, I think I understand politics much better now."

"Excellent, my boy," he answered, "What have you learned?"

Little Johnny thought for a minute and said, "I learned that capitalism is s******g the working class, government is sound asleep ignoring the people, and the future’s full of sh*t."

Answer 4

Pete Wentz falls down and breaks his hand and says "ow, **** my hand!

Patrick Stump looks at him and says "Is that a request?"

Answer 5

So, a guy meets a blonde in a bar and takes her home. They have wild s*x and the next day she calls him. She asks him if he has AIDS and he says "No...Why?" She goes "Good! Cause I got it once and I don't wanna get it again!" (sorry to blondes, but this one made me laugh real hard!)