When a PAP completes a homestudy, should they be required to sign an I will advocate for adoption reform stmt?

Question

This question stems from an earlier question I posed asking if AP's should also go out and advocate for adoption reform- most folks answered yes.

Answer 1

I don't think so.  To be honest I just don't ahve time with the three new kids coming.  When they are older and we have more time then sure, but for now I just can't see us having time for anythign but bonding with our new children.  That doesn't mean I don't support it, it just means I have to priorize and attachment and allowing children to feel safe and loved after their trauma is number one importance!

Answer 2

No I’m sorry but people should not be forced to do things they don’t want to. They can certainly be given information on reform and if they want to participate in it great but if not they shouldn’t be forced too.

People may have other things they are they are more passionate towards or things they feel are more important that they want to focus on.

Answer 3

I don't think it should be LEGALLY required, but any parent that truly loves their child will fight for his/her rights..

Answer 4

There are some people including Adoptive Parents who should not advocate for anything....

This might be a good idea for parents wanting to adopt a newborn however I would be hard-pressed to find the time to focus directly on Adoption Reform between the other areas I need to advocate for my children...

Far more important for my time to be spent advocating on those areas that might best help my child overcome the special needs they have... Education and Mental Health, community awareness and Respite care for families in crisis... Foster care and that system... Drop Adoption Reform on me too and I might as well just become a politician and forget parenting at all...

Besides,  requiring that Adoptive Parents be obligated to advocate reform does not mean that they would Advocate for the same points that you or anyone else sees as important...

Say for instance that the Adoptive Parent you require advocate reform sees something a different way? What if this requirement only leads to Adoptive Parents Advocating that All adoption be closed...or that Under no circumstances should original BC info be made available to adopted people?

I personally have a feeling that requiring Adoptive Parents Advocate for reform would NOT produce the results that the other people involved in adoption would like to see....  

Make AP's be responsible for Advocating would mean you might have to live with the results and I fear that could set the cause back generations....

Remember that Not all AP's hang on the Net and not all of them have any interest at all in the Reforms that you are working for.... To require a whole class to do something means you would be dealing with people who are forced to advocate and when forced I doubt the results will be favorable to the whole group.

Answer 5

Our home study was done by our adoption agency.  I don't think they really want adoption reform so i doubt they would require this form to be signed.

Answer 6

No but I think they should make sure the agency they adopt from uses ethical practices.  They should make sure they know where every penny of their money is going and they should do a lot of research on the psychology of adoption, adopting and being adopted.

Answer 7

h**l YES!  AWESOME POST!

Answer 8

No.  To say yes, would also infer that bio parents should be required to sign the same type of document.  Also, how would you measure advocacy?  

My thought is this....I will support my son in his needs as a child, as a teenager, and into adulthood.  If he feels that adoption reform is something he wants to advocate for, I will be standing right next to him cheering him on and doing what I can to help - just as I would if he chose to run for political office, etc.   But if he chooses to find something else that he is passionate about, I will support that instead.  My goal is to be what HE needs me to be for him.

Answer 9

No...why are PAP less than people?  Why should they be forced to support something if they don't believe in it or understand it?  

I posed a question which was deleted (good job anti-adoption people you win) asking why we treat adoptive parents so poorly.  These are people, they have a right to make up their own mind.

Keep in mind, there are several adoptees and birth parents who don't feel they were so terribly wronged by the system and don't want to reform it.

Before I'm accused of being hateful and mean and hurting someone (or being a man), I acknowledge that horrible things have happened...but not EVERY adopted child is miserable, not EVERY adopted child was stolen, not EVERY birth parent feels misled.

Answer 10

I don't see adoption agencies requiring Paps or AP's to work on adoption reform anytime soon. Would I like them too, YES, but will it happen? Considering the fact that some of the major adoption agencies work against reform, I don't think it will EVER happen.

Ethically speaking though, I would hope that aparents would as well as anyone who loves an adoptee or surrendering parent, or adoptive parent :)

Answer 11

That is never going to happen as domestic infant adoption stands now.  Part of adoption reform comes with not exploiting expectant parents out of their children.  How many would sign that form and know that there should not be pre-birth matching?  How many would sign that form knowing that they should not be attending appointments or the birth of the baby they hope to adopt?  What would signing that form mean when considering that their money is going to agencies, adoption faciliatators and attorneys that practice unethically?

Not many at all.  Adoption reform isn't limited to open records.

Answer 12

That would never happen,  I wish more aparents wanted to though.

Answer 13

Maybe in a dictatorship. I find it interesting that those people who scream about rights want to take away others' rights. It should NOT be a requirement to adopt a child. As others have said, adoptive parents should be well informed about issues their children MAY face, but no one should be forced to advocate. That's just silly.

Answer 14

No, but I think they should WANT to advocate for adoption reform, not be forced to.

Answer 15

I too don't think adoption agencies on the whole would go for something like this.  I think adoptive parents owe it to their child and the natural parents to educated themselves on adoption issues.  I think that adoptive parents if they saw what we, adoptees, saw happening everyday, would push for adoption reform.