When can you say "I give up" ????? (breastfeeding)?

Question

My baby will be 6 weeks on Monday. I had had so many problems trying to breastfed her. I ....can't do it!!!!! I've cried enough!!!!. I had a LC I went twice to see her. I'll go Tuesday again. I have a leaders from a Leche coming to my house I'm trying to call her again today. I'm going back to work on the 15 and I can't do it!. :( :( :( . First was nipple confusion, then she didn't latch on, then mastitis, now she doesn't want to take my breast at night..........When should I give up??? I'm thinking exclusive express milk. I'm feeling so guilty. Is breastfeeding not for me??????

Answer 1

Give up when you want and don't feel guilty.  It's YOUR body and no one else can judge you!  Your baby will be fine!

Answer 2

Whenever you want, you are not required to breastfeed hon. Expressing is just as good for you babe....I do it. I also supplement. As long as you feed your child something you are doing just fine.  

Answer 3

Oh you poor thing, i wish i could have breastfeed my daughter i tried also and she didn't latch, then i didn't get enough milk and she was screaming i only lasted less than 2 weeks, so good on you for going 6 weeks! It u to you when you give up, i wish i tried harder but i was in too much pain and didn't have enough support. Do what is best for you, try expressing but i did that and couldn't stick to it and looking after bub at the same time.

Answer 4

You know what -

You have experienced all of the potential problems possible and overcome them all so far - so good for you. Be proud of yourself.

I also had a lot of difficulties in the first couple of months, similar to you - and then I had over-production and he was choking when he ate..

But you know what - you are past the hardest part - it gets easier from this point on. The first six weeks as a Mom are SO overwhelming (full of tears too) and then when you are unable to feed properly - wow it feels like h**l.

Kids go through periods where they refuse it at certain times of the day, or even are relunctant to eat for a couple days at a time (like if you menstruate or if you eat something they don't like the taste of)  Thats okay!

Honestly - you have made it through the most difficult time and overcome all the major challenges in breastfeeding . Trust me when I say - IT WILL GET EASIER. And later when your baby is 6 months, not six weeks and you are still breastfeeding - you will be so proud of yourself.

The benefits to your child are endless...

You can do it!

Answer 5

Give yourself credit for trying!  I know some people that don't even try.  I breastfed both my children but, I make skim milk.  I had to top off every feeding with formula.  Do what feels right for you.  If you want to just pump it out and feed the expressed milk from a bottle, that's great.  Don't worry you are doing a great job.  Your baby has received allot of your immunities from your effort already.

Answer 6

Do not feel bad and let NO ONE else make you feel bad. Hey 6 weeks is enough to have given your baby the intial antibodies. That is Great. It sounds like you have really put a lot of work into it. I could not breast feed and I know how bad you can feel. My milk never came in and when I tried my baby would suck for a minute and then just cry & cry, I felt horrible. But I am over that now. Look the formula they have out is just fine. If we were in the cave man days well then you would have to keep on with it and I hate to say it but my baby would of starved. But we are not in caveman days. It is okay. You need to do what is best for you. Your baby am sure can sense the fustration as well. So relax and make the right choice the fits you and your little one.  

Answer 7

It sounds like this is something that is very important to you. In that case, YES breastfeeding is for you!

Hang in there, mama! You WILL get the hang of it. If you knew there was going to be one more week until you finally got it would you keep trying? How about 2 more weeks?

My baby is 11 weeks old and I just started getting it. I went through so much. Oversupply, overactive letdown, 2 lactation consultants, gassy baby from allergies (and now I can hardly eat anything lol). It caused me alot of agony. But I kept telling myself it would get better. It took 2.5 months but it finally DID get better. And now I am so happy I stuck with it.

It is so rewarding (and SO much easier than other feeding methods)once you finally get it. And Im sure it wont take you as long as it did me. Even if it does take just one more month, is it worth it to you?  

Answer 8

That's pretty much up to you. Looks like you've really tried hard. What does the La Leche League advise? No matter what you decide you should be proud of yourself for giving it an honest effort. I hope it works out for you but if you decide to bottle feed that's fine too. Don't feel guilty, there is so much more to being a good mom then how you feed the baby. I care more that a baby is fed then HOW it's fed personally. Keep trying as long as your comfortable with it. I hope it works out!!

Answer 9

I am a breatfeeding advocate & I think it is great & don't understand why anyone wouldn't want to nurse a baby, it is what is natural & what God intended our breast for.  (They are feed bags not fun bags. lol)  With that said you gave it the best shot you could. Don't feel guilty about quitting, if that is your choice.  But don't be totally turned off either as far as future babies are concerned.  They all have their own nursing styles and you could have the best of luck with your next baby.  It is very difficult to maintain a milk supply while working esp full time. It becomes a job on it's own. So don't feel bad-do what is necessary to fully enjoy that baby!  those 6 weeks of nursing gave her an excellent start on life-be proud of it despite the agony!!!

Answer 10

Don't feel guilty or bad. You are not alone in this otherwise there wouldn't be so much help out there for women with problems while trying to breastfeed.

If you can still give your daughter BM by extraction than that is brilliant. If that also doesn't work, ther is always formula. I know a lot people are against it, but millions of babies trive on it (including my own) and sometimes we have no choice....unfortunately.

You just do what's best for you and what gives your little girl a happy and full tummy, so you can finally really start enjoying being a mum.

Lots of good luck and congrats on your new baby girl :)

Answer 11

Stress does you no good as a new mom, so if it  is causing a lot of stress then go ahead and stop. You gave it a good shot and it isn't working out and that's ok. You plan on giving her expressed milk you said and that is fine too. You tried and gave it your all and that's great. Some people just have trouble nursing and have to express and bottle feed, there is no shame in that. Besides once you return to work, it is difficult to keep up anyway. Good job for trying, don't let anyone make you feel bad about having to stop it. :-)

Answer 12

if its stressing you out, i think not. its not as if youve not tried. and she will still be getting the goodness of breastmilk so i wouldnt worry, 6 weeks of breastfeeding has given her a fantastic start!!! well done!! xx

Answer 13

sorry for you! I had so many problems too and it is so hard and frustrating. I didn't really get into a groove with it till 2 months, then we both had thrush! Such a pain. Maybe the pumping is a good alternative. she'll get the nutrition, and you are still holding her when she eats. And you can always try to go back to some sessions on the breast if you are still pumping. And if you do want to stick with it, keep getting the help and support. It probably will get easier if you can hang in there.  Whatever you decide, just remind yourself she needs a happy, rested, not stressed out mama!  

Answer 14

You can say "I give up" when YOU feel you can't try anymore.  

Nobody here can tell you when you've reached that point.  I've known of women who gave up at 2 days. I've known of women who struggled with difficulties for 4-6 months or more.

Feeding pumped milk is certain a valid option if you can't get her to breastfeed. (Healthier for baby than formula, but again, you are the only one who can decide if the increased hassle is outweighed by the benefits.

Answer 15

Don't feel guilty!  You've tried and that's all you can do.  You should give up when it's not working for you anymore, or when you've given it all you can but it's just not working out - but don't feel guilty, not even for one second!  Your child needs a mother who is happy and content, not upset and frustrated.  If you can pump and want to, that's great, and if not there is no shame in using formula - your baby will be 100% healthy either way as long as she is fed and loved.

Answer 16

With my first, it was about six weeks. I nursed and expressed for him and it was just wearing on me! With my second, it was 2 months. With both it just was tiring me out and I was getting very stress.

I think when you come to the point where you are really stressed and don't think you want to do it anymore, you should stop. It's not very good for you to feel that way. Plus the baby can sense how you are feeling. My doc suggested that when breastfeeding became a chore, it was time to stop.

I hope things go well for you!!

Answer 17

i feel very stongly about breastfeeding. i dont thikn people should be taking the easy way out! i say dont give up! i almost did because of the pain and im 100% glad my husband "kicked my butt" when i told him i just "HAD" to stop! push though it you can do it! just relax! your baby is probably picking up on you! stay relaxed.. watch tv.. put on your fav song and just put her next to your breast and let her find it and eat away! good luck!