When do I tell the teacher?

Question

I have a kindergartener boy and the past 3 days he is telling me of 2 girls calling him names (r****d and dummy) -I don't want to overreact and call the school over a little name calling. When I was in Kindergarten I don't remember name calling already. My son has not a mean bone in his body and doesn't speak up or tell the teacher and I don't want to be one of the hovering mothers but today one girl pulled the chair out from under him and he fell on his back on the floor (because he was sitting in her chair doing a puzzle doing play time). I am so overprotective of my little boy and this hurts my heart. What would you do? My mother in law thinks if I don't call - he could be coming home with a broken neck. When my son came home he told me the teacher sent him to the nurse and he wore an ice pack on his back today. Since the school didn't call about this does that mean it was too minor and I should trust them or is this enough to call or write about? Is this common in kindergarten?

Answer 1

You should talk to the teacher as soon as you can and let her address the issue. If not it could lead to bigger problems.

Answer 2

this isn't a very common issue, but don't get to worried about it. the best thing to do in this situation is to schedule a meeting with the teacher and calmly tell her your concerns and ask her if she can please keep a look out. and if that doesn't work then the next thing to do is have a talk to the parents of the children who are doing the teasing and have them take care of the situation.

Answer 3

I am only in the 7th grade, however I help out with Kindergarten teachers and babysit them (them being kindergartners), and that is not normal. If I were you, I would talk to the teacher about this and take a stand. You can never be over protective when it comes to someone you love.

Answer 4

You should have a talk with the teacher now...often the teacher is not aware of this kind of behaviour (its never done in front of her) She will most likely appreciate your concerns....

Answer 5

There is almost no such thing as overprotective.  In fact, as mothers, it's our job to protect our children.  They will be involved with kids like this throughout their school experience.  At this age, he is too young to handle the situation, so you'll have to step in.  

The injury should be taken seriously and you should calmly let the teacher know that you are taking it seriously.  That your son has told you several times that these girls are picking on him in class and that they do it cooperatively.  

If she/he doesn't offer a response that satisfies you.  Ask him/her how they plan to handle it.  If it happens one more time, make an appointment with the principal and the teacher.

Keep a record of events.  When your son first told you and what he said.  When he was hurt and how it happened.  The results of the injury.  When you phoned or talked with the teacher to make the appt.  When you met with her/him and be as exact as you can about what was said and what the teacher promised to do.

Don't allow the teacher to draw you into an argument.  Just tell him/her that you have a right to expect safety for your child and that perhaps the two of you need to meet with someone (principal; school psychologist) who can help the two of you solve the problem.

My experience with public school is that this won't be the last time you have to stand up for your child.

Good luck!

Answer 6

trust your instincts mama bear. either your son is lying (unlikely from your story) or the school is not fully dealing with the situation. if you can, arrange a meeting with the teacher to discuss your concerns without your son present. a first time mom that is worried is not overreacting, its part of the learning process of being a parent. don't go in guns blazing, be calm, and avoid tears if possible. these kids seem young to be so aggressive, but alas the world is changing and fast! good luck, your baby will be just fine!

Answer 7

I have a kindergatener and it's sad how early the kids start with the teasing, etc.  I don't think you're overreacting.  I would definitely get in touch with the teacher and discuss your concerns.

Answer 8

I show up at the school.

I know a 5 year old that got expelled for fighting.

Please take care of him. Life is precious and too short.

I hope this helps.

Answer 9

From one to another, if you are not comfortable with something then you must speak up, especially when it comes to your child; your young child at that.  Let me tell you something my daughter's principal told me while in a meeting with her...."you have to be your child's advocate."  Therefore your child is very young and can not do many things for himself, this is where he needs his Mom.  Think about things this way...if your son was being abused by an adult you would say something wouldn't you?  Same thing here, even though they are little girls....it is still the same, these girls can see that they are getting away with things so it's now up up you to put an end to it.  Set up a meeting with the teacher and the principal and talk to them about this and let them know you want to nip this in the bud ASAP!!!  Good luck, things will work out, tell your son that when these girls do this he HAS to tell the teacher because what the girls are doing is not nice.

Answer 10

All of my kids have been bullied at one time or another.  It really is a tough call.  With my oldest, we just explained to her that she needs to stand up for herself and she did.  With our middle daughter, she is very sensitive and we had to write notes to the teacher, bus driver, and eventually school principle to have the issues resolved.  My youngest only cares for about 10 sec. and then gets over it, but he's only in preschool.  If you feel your child can handle it by themself, then let them, if this isn't an option then handle it for them.  Good luck and I hope everything works out okay!

Answer 11

i think it is common in kidergarten. but its still mean and not appropriate.

something needs to be said. she can watch these kids and intervene without being overly involved.

i believe kids need to work alot of things out themselves. we all get picked on. but if i heard about that happening to one of MY kids...you bet i would be in there talking to the teacher.

Answer 12

it is not appropriate and the teacher should have done something, you are right to be protective of your little boy, besides this is kindergarten he isn't yet old enough to learn how to stick up for himself so i agree you should talk to the teacher in his class. Im sorry for you and your little one hope it all gets resolved.

Answer 13

Write a letter to the teacher about your concerns.  Tell her the names of the children involved & hopefully she'll have a talk with them explaining why teirt behavior in not acceptable.  Don't "jump down the schools throat", just make them aware of the problem.

Also, anytime your son sees a nurse & is treated with an injury, wether it's minor or not, you should be told about it.