When he wants to be free...does he come back?

Question

We broke up. No fight, he is in a phase when he wants to be free and fool around. Tough decision for him, he would've continued with me but i can not continue feeling that he is not completely with me.

I love him, i am great to him (his opinion), we communicate great, no lying, no cheating, we support each other but he is restless.

I gave him the freedom he needed, even if he wanted to continue like this. I wasn't happy and i was making him unhappy and i hate that. I don't want us to get to the point when he cheats or lies and i hate him...and there is nothing possible between us anymore.

So i told him to be free, do his thing, he would mind his own business i would mind my own, we are friends, i love him, he loves me, he said he would be by me anytime i need him and i should call him no matter what, if i need to talk to him. I don't call him, i don't think you stop hurting when you break up with someone if you talk to the exact person.

My question is: we both said we need the hope that one day we'd be together. I need this now, it keeps me going...he came back later saying that he misses me like h**l and he needs this hope too. And no, we don't get back together now, because if he needs to be free, this would come up sooner or later.

So...do you think this would be possible? If i let him go, and we broke up in the best terms possbile, he respects me and appreciates me more than anybody, Do you think we can go back to where we were and start it all over again, with the conquering, the beginning and all that?

I wonder if the issue is that i am not the one for him (he is for me...:|) and he actually wants to look for that (well actually he says he needs to have more women, to conquer and play and can not be with me because if i am hurt he is hurt...cuz he cares...).

Note: he broke up with his ex (1.5 years ago), after 2.5 years for the same reason. He needed freedom, but the problem is that the last 6 months together were h**l for both of them so i would never want to get there (they both said that between the two of them there will be nothing again, as too many bad things happened...).

So guys..give me your valuable opinion please.

Answer 1

Birds fly because I love them.

E-giggle.

COME UNDER MY WING.

Answer 2

i had a similer problem 11 years ago she wanted more freedom that i could give her. the pain got to be to much and i had to walk away from the only woman i ever loved. i walked for those eleven years not getting in relationships just seeking knowlage when i decided to slow down and mabey give my heart a chance to find love again she came back in my life a new woman who never lost the love she had for me. we searched for each other for all those years only to find out we were always a city or two away i hope that works

Answer 3

No offense, but does the words self respect mean anything to you?  

Any guy who wants to s***w other girls but assures you that one day you'll be together, is feeding you a load of bull.  And there are lots of guys who get by fine in life with being with a small amount of women, some of them even 1 their whole life.  He's just trying to have his fun, knowing he can eventually come back to you.  I'm surprised you are just okay with that.

I know you said, you are both "free" to do your own thing, however, it's clear as crystal that it's not what you want.

Let's not even mention the possibility of one of you getting a STD from you being "free".

But honestly, sweetheart, if you wait around for him to come back, that's pretty sad.  I hope when you are both being "free", you meet a great guy who makes you want to be exclusive.  

Answer 4

sounds good, why don't you party with him and have a threesome.

If not, you being cool with it helps, I'd date you!

Answer 5

This is not happening, and i wont give you false hope.

It would be nice if you broke up with him on good terms and look for somebody else.it will be good for you. he does not seem like understanding you true feeliing. so just leave it.You need somebody who is focus on you and not just another girl for experiment.

Good luck and hope you find good guy soon.

Answer 6

If you love him, let him go. If he comes back, then hes yours forever. But if he doesnt, he was never yours in the first place.

I know its extreamly corny but its true. Once he leaves, he'll realize how much he missed you. But if he doesnt, then i guess you guys werent made for each other,

So give him the space he wants. Meaning dont call him first. Or e-mail. Or have any communicatino with him for a while, if he misses you then he'll be the one to call, and crawl back to you on his knees.

Answer 7

it sounds as if he has commitment problems. he may come back but you have to think long and hard about this. can you trust him after this? will you be able to move on and not think  that he will pull this again on you?

Answer 8

he's afraid of committment, try to move on, he's not right for you.