When is breakfast better in LA than in NY?

Question

BREAKFAST IN LOS ANGELES AND NEW YORK: A Play in Two Acts

by Elaine Polin

An out-of-state friend, noting my frenetic NY attitude, recently asked me to “lighten up.”

This is my response. (A true story).

ACT I: Breakfast in LA

CHARACTERS:

Joan (LA resident)

Elaine (New Yorker)

Waitress

SETTING: A table in an LA restaurant.

W: Good morning, ladies. Isn’t it a beautiful morning?

J: It’s perfect. You can even see the Hollywood sign!

W: Are you from around here?

J: I live about a mile from here and my friend, Elaine

is visiting me from New York.

W: (To Elaine) Oh! How wonderful!

Do you like us?

E: May we please order now?

J: She really DOES like us, but she is very hungry.

We were up practically all night talking.

W: Oh! What were you talking about?

J: Well, I have this boyfriend and he….

E: (Clears throat)

etc.

ACT II: Breakfast in New York

CHARACTERS: The same three people

SETTING: A table in a New York restaurant.

W: (Stands with pad and pen poised)

E: I’ll have eggs up, over easy on a plain bagel.

W: (Looks at Joan)

E: (Kicks Joan under table) Give her your order.

J: What a beautiful day!

I’m so happy to be in New York!

W: (Clears throat)

E: Give her your order!

J: May I please have two eggs, scrambled

on an everything bagel?

W: (Writing, turns and walks away).

Answer 1

ny food is the best can tell you that mutch

Answer 2

So funny and I know it's true...God help you in Florida!

Answer 3

What comes to my mind is Sociolinguistics and Discourse Analysis. =)

This is awesome. It should be included in one of my textbooks.

Answer 4

This is marvelous - you have encapsulated everything into these revealing little playlets....I know nothing of either place - but, I do recognise  a village/city scenario.

Me, chatting in my local village shop, with a wide friendly smile on my face - and the response is banter and fun.

Same stuff in Birmingham, shop-assistant begins looking behind me at the rest of the queue - no smile/no eye contact.

I'd like to see more of these, please

Answer 5

I prefer a Martian breakfast of goligogs and widernuts on finelkie bread, served with ice cold nonokie juice.

Answer 6

I'd love to have you come visit, but if things are slow for you in LA, don't EVEN consider small town Arkansas. However, we can make some killer coffee and iced tea. It might take a few months, but you'll get it, and a vast array of beloved southern drawls.

Answer 7

This is very funny! I'm smiling as I read this because my husband always jokes that they're not going to like me in the South when we move because I am too d**n impatient!  

Answer 8

Hmmm...I need more coffee and a bagel. Had breakfast in both cities,

prefer having mine right here...in the little town at the edge of the world.

Thus stated, your offering is delightful!

Answer 9

Very funny and very true.  I have dined in both locales.  The delis in Manhattan are always classic, especially the waitstaff!

Answer 10

This is funny. I live right on the border of NY and NJ, so this is quite amusing to me. If you think the staff is bad, well NY & NJ customers are the worst! Thats probably why the waitresses start off with a bad attitude. Its a defense mechanism.

I`ve actually been a pain in the behind customer in the past, then I have a guilt trip afterwards. Yeah we have bad attitudes over here. SORRY!

I`ve been to NC and to Egypt, and I`ve seen truly praiseworthy service. Thats how I know we've got blameworthy service over here.

Answer 11

Thanks for the laugh today !!! It's so true ,,,I've eaten in both cities & you've nailed it!!! I'm from New Jersey ,,,& not much different here in some towns As in NY or LA

,,,,,,,Well Done,,,,,,,,,

Answer 12

Are you comparing the relaxed West with the no-nonsense East?  I use to  talk daily - to people on the East Coast - mainly the five boroughs of New York.  It was a shock to me at first. Their abruptness, etc. really were new to learn.  They were not meaning to be rude or unfriendly - it was just their way ♥

Answer 13

I conceive that the breakfast held in LA is better.What a decent play! However,the conditions of it is that the play at LA is too humorous,for you cited 'Do you like us?' and 'really DOES like us'.They are not suited for a genuine play.

Answer 14

"Hi!",

How funny, I have never been to neither as long as the food tasted good and wasn't cold when you received it Should of been o.k. But New York???? Did you even receive your meal???????????

WELL DONE!

Cheers : )  

Answer 15

W: "Hi! My name is Amy, I will be your server this evening."

TD: "Hi! My name is TD. I will be your eater this evening."

Sheryl: Holds the menu up in front of her face.

W: "Our specials are the Fish & Chips or the Spring Rolls."

TD: "What are your extra specials?"

Sheryl: Kicks TD in the shin.

W: "That's it, just the Wednesday Specials."

TD: "If we come back tomorrow, won't there be new specials? Wouldn't that make them 'Extra Specials'?"  

Answer 16

Oh!  This is wonderful.  It cracked me up.  It is the truth.  Whenever I leave NY, I can see this difference in attitude.  Who's better?  I don't know.  But, I'm a NY'r through and through and want my breakfast NOW.  Well done.