When is the right time to have kids?

Question

I ask this question because every time I ask my husband when are we going to start a family he keeps telling I don't know, or lets not talk about it. Before we got married we discuss that we would wait a year and try to have a family but when that year came around all bets were off. 3 years in a row I felt like I have been begging my husband to start a family with me and its always been no. I have been depress alot over the past years because of this issue, with crying myself to sleep and it seems like its not getting any better. We have been married for 5 years and together for a total of 8 years. I seem like I'm the only one who really wants kids even though he does tellls his parents he wants them to. I'm 30 yrs old and he is 31 is it ever to old to have a kid because I really don't want to wait to long. This really is a big issue because the more and more he says no, the more and more its pushing me away.

Answer 1

by the sounds of things a lot of people have given you alot of good advice. i'm very broody right now to but getting amrried soon and both me and my other half have decided it is not the right time yet. Hoever i really don't want to wiat too long either.

In my opoinin men seam to think that its better for tehn to grow up or mature, but theynever really do and that has never made any father i know a bad parent. Some times they are just afriad of giveing up tehr independace, but becoming a parent can make you more independant. it is dependanet on how you both feel, but maby there would be a way of talking to him about having kids and not seaming to be pushy or adamint.

You are best to explain how you really feel and talk through with him your options. its not wether or not his parents ever want to have kids, it is about hima teh the end of the day. And if you find the right way to talk to him but only you know him well enought to find away to do that without feeling pushy or intimidaing!!

Good luck, i hope i am never where you are now

Answer 2

Talk with him about his hesitation to start a family.  The worse thing you could do is to have a child against his will and have him resent you. Or for you to have a child and resent him because he isn't as passionate about being a parent or involved in child rearing to the extent that you idealize in your mind.  Children, while a symbol of your love, can really drive a wedge in a marriage.  The husband falls by the wayside no matter how much you try to juggle.  You need to keep the lines of communication open.  A child isn't even here, and it is driving a wedge between you already.  Good luck whatever may happen.  

Answer 3

Leave his ***. He won't give you what you want so make  him suffer

Answer 4

I think, painful as it is, you need to face the fact that your husband doesn't want kids.   For whatever reason, he won't come right out and tell you, so he keeps putting you off.

For both your sakes, tell him this.  And make plans for what you will do if he continues.

Take care of yourself.

All the best.

Answer 5

Your husband doesn't seem to be really interested in having kids. Perhaps he feels unsure about taking on such responsibility and prefers to be free. In my opinion, when a person with an able body refuses to have family is acting simply out of selfishness, not knowing that a society without children tends to disappear. 30 years is not quite late to have babies, but is not the ideal age. It would be much better to have babies on your twenties.

Finally, if you want to have your own babies and your husband is not crazy about it, maybe is time for you to explore other possibilities, including adoptions, or even remarriaging.

Answer 6

Never. Little brats.  

Answer 7

I was 32 when I had my first child...I have three.  The best time to have children is when you are BOTH financially and emotionally ready to be parents.  Obviously your husband isn't ready