When should my child be able to tie her shoelaces?

Question

I have a friend who is a new kindergarten teacher, and she refuses to help her students button pants and tie shoelaces. My daughter is 4 and will start K in 1 year from now, and she is nowhere near tying her laces. I consider her a smart girl, but at this rate I don't think she'll be tying her own laces in K. But, I'd hate for her to have to trip all day because her teacher won't tye them for her!? What do you think?

Answer 1

In the UK the teachers in nursery and reception will help with buttons and laces, but in year 1 (5/6 yr old) they are expected to be able to do these themselves.  If they can't then just buy shoes that fasten with velcro so she won't be tripping up.  My son is 8 and has just learnt to do his reliably by himself, but i found teaching him hard as he is left handed and we are all right handed.  I bought flat plastic shoe shapes with laces to help teach my two, which helped a bit.

Answer 2

It took my daughter forever to learn!  She is 9 now, and still doesn't do a real good job tying them- but she gets the job done.  She could barely do it in kindergarden- usually someone would help her.  By first and second, she got a little better.

Answer 3

Kindergarten teachers, atleast in our school, have 20 kids and no aides, and as much as it seems like it is all about fun, they do have a lot to accomplish in school. Tying shoe laces and helping with fastening buttons on pants is just not feasible.  To us parents it seems like it only takes a minute and helps the child, but if we think about it from their point of view, they are taking their eyes away from 19 other kids who can get into trouble.

And, since there are options like velcro shoes adn pants with elastic in the waists, it makes sense to me.  

Yes, most kids in K don't know and I would say about 25% don't still know how to do them fast and tightly in 1st grade too.

Answer 4

My son is 5 and starting Kindergarten in a week. He doesn't know how to tie his laces and I tried to show him but he just doesn't get it yet. It probably doesn't help that he's left handed (I'm not) and he has been wearing sandals all summer. I bought him some shoes with velcro closures so he will be able to do it by himself without bugging the teacher- I know she'll already have her hands full. With that being said, any teacher who "refuses" to help kids tie their shoes shouldn't be teaching Kindergarten. All kids are different and some kids fine motor skills aren't developed enough to master something like tying shoes at that age. If their parents send them in shoes with laces then it's a safety matter that they remained tied- kids will be tripping all over the place. A good teacher would help TEACH the child this skill, not just refuse to help at all.

Answer 5

I have something wrong with my hands so I did not start tying my shoes till I was 10  

Answer 6

Take some time out and show her.  If she's left handed then get a left handed friend to sit alongside her and show her.  Practice with very long shoe laces such as those on her dad's shoes.  In the meantime, can't the child wear buckled shoes?

Answer 7

My kids couldn't tie in Kindergarten but I had 2 pairs of sneakers for them.  One was a velcro kind for school and the one with laces was at home for learning.  Lot's of Kindergarten kids can't tie yet..don't worry

Answer 8

Every child develops differently, my 9 year old cousin had trouble learning but has managed it. If you practice with her she will learn quicker. As for the teacher, she should be halping the children out and needs a stern word if she is lettin children walk and run around with untied laces!

Answer 9

Usually within the first year of attending school. Up to then children are used to having parents tie them. Once they start school and relaise mum and dad aren't there to do it they learn themselves real quick.

Answer 10

i would just teach her, as much as you can. or you could get her velcro shoes until she learns, and wants to wear the "big girl shoes"

Answer 11

She will not know how to tie her shoes unless you teach her. Her teacher will not tie her shoes for her because she thinks that it is the parents job to teach her how.

Answer 12

Your child shoudl be able to tie her shoelaces when you teach her. My brother is 7 going into 2nd grade and he still can't tie his shoes. just teach her before she goes to K and she will be fine.

Answer 13

In a year, you'll be amazed at how much she will learn.  Start having her help to tie her laces.  She should be doing most all of her other dressing on her own by now.  :)

It's the norm for K teachers to put that down as one of their parent rules.