When someone you don't like tries VERY hard to get you to like them, what do you do?

Question

What do I do? I hate them even more!

Ugh! When you don't like someone but you're forced to be nice because they are your relative, and they give you a gift for the holiday or birthday, what do you do with it?

Someone in the family who I can't stand noticed it was my birthday a few weeks ago. She went out of her way to get me a picture of me and my daughter that she took while she was visiting us. I want to get rid of it because she took it and she gave it to me. I just don't like her at all. She's so intrusive and annoying.

When you know someone doesn't like you, why do you try that much harder to get them to like you?

I'm not even talking about stupid high school things like crushes, just family members and in-laws.

Answer 1

ecept it and be nice.. (obviously) and talk to her about how you need your space and if that doesn't work MAKE HER UNDERSTAND

Answer 2

I tell them that if they keep getting involved with me i'm going to make them cry, and she still came for me.  

By the way, she did cry.

Answer 3

Buy a gun.

Answer 4

cant suggest coz im stuck somewhere with the same situation

Answer 5

i would put the picture in the closet, and whenever i think she is coming over, i would run and put it out on a counter or something....

but hey, EVERYBODY has at least that ONE relative that they dont like, but are required to like because everyone else expects you to like them because they like you so much....

but how I handled my situation with my annoying relative, is that i would constantly ask them to loan me money, or something until they didnt like me.

so the overall answer IS:

either put up with the person like some other people do with thier annoying relatives.

make them dislike you without letting them know you are trying to make them dislike you.

or talk bad about them behind thier back with other people who obviously dont like them as well.<<<highly reccomended....lol!

Answer 6

You don't need to do anything.  Keep it cordial and accept gifts with graditude.  There is no reason for you hang the picture in a prominent spot, but it also doesn't hurt to put it in a place where you don't have to see it all the time but can say you didn't throw it out.  

If they know you don't like them, they are probably just trying to win you over by being extra nice (and annoying).  Give it time and maybe you will learn something about them to appreciate something about them.  

If they try to be in contact with you more than the normal family functions where you might see them, just politely decline.  Keep the contact minimal in a respectful manner... You can choose your friends, but not your family.

Answer 7

You say thank you for the gift.  And you make every opportunity to not be with her.  But since she is family, realize you ONLY have to see her on holidays etc.

Answer 8

Come On...

Be thankful they give a d**n.  Smile, say thankyou.  You don't know how lucky you are.

Sherri G

Answer 9

I think we try to be polite when we know they're well intentioned.

Answer 10

call the cops on them

Answer 11

Take the high road. Be Nice for the sake of being nice. You can be nice with out letting them get close to you, especialy if they are a family member. It's OK not to like someone, it's not OK to be intentialy rude or cruel. Take the high road and you will be the better person because of it.

Answer 12

Well, what can you do...Family is tied in, you can't just get rid of them.  I dunno, try to just ignore everything that annoys you about them.

Answer 13

long story short- my dad cheated on my mom and remarried this evil freak. she'll lash out at me, then the next time i see her pretend to be all sweet.

all you can do is ignore the fact, because what you do with one family member could affect your relationship with another. so you don't have to love them, just be respectful then you can gag when they leave.

Answer 14

wow.. that's spiteful!  i'm sorry but something so beautiful like a photo of you and your children was giving and tooken by someone whom you dont like!

wow i just don't know how to wrap my head around it!

but i guess it's more common! one of my co workers gave me a gift of hers because the gift giver she didn't like!

I understand you don't like her and I assume you have told her that!

I would let her know that her thought was nice but your not accepting any gifts!  and return to sender!

my thought is tho if you didn't want it why did you open it?



if someone is in your family and they are all about family then that's why they try harder!  they want to be apart of your life!

it might not be a bad idea to sit down and set some guidelines and talk with her!  i know it will be hard to be nice with you not liking her but there is no need to be rude when you do this!

Frankly if someone was like you to me i wouldn't try harder i would just ignore you!  but she isn't like that so try communication your wishes to her!

tell her you don't want any gifts!  you don't want her to visit you want nothign to do with her!

then the rest is up to you to ignore her!

Best wishes!!

Answer 15

They are being obstinate and want to get their way with you. It's like forcing someone to eat something they don't like. Just cut her off.

Answer 16

just ignore

Answer 17

ahahaa...

i would tell them that you're taken...

or try to flirt w/ a bunch of other guys in front of them...that works too...

or you could be mean and tell them to stay the h**l out of ur life...;p!

Answer 18

Well, for one, I don't think you are being very fair.  This person went out of there way to give you a gift, and you just want to trash it because you don't like her?  There is no book that says you have to like them- but at least recognize their efforts.  Look at the petals of the rose-not the thorns.  Maybe this relative of yours is a better person then you give her credit for.  Think about it.

Answer 19

I think that even if you don't like them, it was a good-natured thing to do. You should set your boundaries with them, and try to keep them from overstepping them. Having so much anger toward an in-law isn't healthy for the relationship you have with your spouse or your spouse's family.

Answer 20

oh that's a real problem...... my dear i can understand your plight........ but i think relations are very important.  its relations that brings the beauty of life............. but today we don't realise its importance............ but i think each and every relation has a limit so by observing the limits of each and every relations.... would indeed ease your tasks.............. thus i would advised you to ponder well on the matter and i'm sure that it will become easy.............""love each other forgive each other don't hate each other."" i consider this to be the most important lesson in life

Answer 21

There must be a reason you feel like this.  I think you should try to trace back your reason and try to look at this person with honesty and truth.

It might be that your mis trust is right.  If so then remember your house is your castle and you REALLY DON'T HAVE TO HAVE ANYONE IN THERE THAT YOU DON'T WANT.

Answer 22

You have an unhealthy attitude... from what you told us... there is no reason to not like this person, and every reason to like them... and yet.. you hate them....

I think you need an attitude adjustment....

Answer 23

tell them your thoughts or ignore them or have a row