When the priest invites anyone who objects to the marriage to “speak now or forever hold their peace"?

Question

what happens if someone objects? have you seen this before at a wedding?

Answer 1

I have never seen this at a wedding.  Apparently it's only in the movies.

Answer 2

When you have your loved ones at your wedding they obviously  support the union, so while there are a couple of horror stories of ppl actually objecting to the wedding, it hardly happens.

Also now it is common for ppl to leave this out of the ceremony.

If someone objects there are funny ways of dealing with them for example at one wedding the priest said to the man that objected I am sorry but the groom does not go that way and likes women. The entire crowd laughed and the man was dealt with later....

Answer 3

I think it has to be a legitimate reason such as "I'm having an affair with the groom and also having his child" or "He/She is just marrying you for your money and they told me so!".

If it was a mother in law shouting out "I object because i just don't like you" then it would be ignored, she would be a ***** and hopefully she'd be kicked out!

I worry that my future mother in law will scream something out. I'm scared now!

Answer 4

A priest in a Catholic wedding ceremony does not say this. Maybe in some other denominations, or civil services, they may... but I've been to tons of weddings, and have never seen it.

For our wedding, which was Ukrainian Catholic, instead of getting a licence, marriage banns are published in the church bulletin for three weeks before the wedding. In that little blurb, this is an example - (and yes, they use the capitals.... it's not me...)

Marriage Banns: Luke Micheal Smith of Anytown, State, son of John Smith & Kim Jones and Lisa Dawn Green of Anycity, State., daughter of Mark Green & Brenda Brown. (1st Notification) ANYONE HAVING KNOWLEDGE OF ANY OBSTACLE TO THE PROPOSED MARRIAGE HAS AN OBLIGATION IN CONSCIENCE TO MAKE IT KNOWN TO THE PASTOR AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.

Answer 5

Most priests take this out now. It's usually only on TV or movies. But it would be exciting/horrible to attend a wedding where someone stands up and objects!

Answer 6

This is more for the movies than in real life.  I have never even heard that asked at the weddings I attend (both Catholic and Lutheran).  The minister/priest does NOT ask that question usually.

In any case, if your minister/judge would happen to say that....and someone does actually object....it must be a "legal" reason for objection, not like in the movies where someone is in love with the bride or groom!!  Again, it must be a legal objection (such as the bride/groom is already legally married to someone else or bride/groom is wanted on a felony arrest warrant) or some such thing.

So, don't worry about it.  It doesn't happen.

Answer 7

Haven't seen it and not sure exactly what happens, but it's becoming more popular for the priest no to ask that question. I didn't have him ask at our wedding. We thought it is no one's business anyway, and that's an outdated tradition!

Answer 8

if someone objects and just says "she's a b* tch don't marry her" they will most likely be escorted out by some family members and the ceremony will continue.

If someone stands up and says "you can't marry her, we're still legally married" or any other LEGAL reason whether it's a hoax or not the officiant has to stop the ceremony and can not continue til allegations are proven true or false.  Usually meaning the entire day is ruined

Answer 9

I don't think they ask that anymore. Although when I got married I had a lot of friends joke they were going to do it.

Edit: In my wedding, it wasnt even an option whether to have it or not. It just wasnt included. It depends on where you get married.

Answer 10

They don't say that at real ceremonies. Only on TV and in movies.

Answer 11

My wedding is in 5 weeks and I am having that part removed from the wedding...They can object there little hearts out all they want, just not on our wedding day.

Answer 12

hehe, although i have never seen this done, i have been wondering about this myself. I would be horrified though if someone did something like that at my wedding =>

Answer 13

Some people ask that it be removed so that people don't have the chance to object. The priest will usually say something to the effect of, "If any man, woman, or child has any just reason or cause why these two should not be lawfully wed or joined, speak now or forever hold your peace." I have actually been to a wedding where someone objected. It was the mother of the groom. I think she did it for the attention because when you do that, all eyes are on you. The priest asked what was her reason, and she had a lot to say. At the bride's request, she was escorted out of the church. The wedding went on without a hitch, but in the parking lot, she wanted to raise h**l yet again. She said something to the bride's father, and it was so inappropriate. It was like watching a train wreck. I wouldn't wish that on my worst enemy. It was later discovered that she had been drinking before the ceremony began. That was an unforgettable wedding. Looking back, it's funny, but I couldn't imagine being in that situation. Most couples just have that part completely taken out, though. I don't blame them.

Answer 14

It's not said very often but I have had some couple request it.

The reason it was once a part of the ceremony was before we had the communication we have today, a person could come into town and start up a life & already be married 2 towns over.  So it was asked if anyone knew why the couple shouldn't be married......in case one wasn't totally honest.

If someone does object the clergy might try to ignore the outburst, but sometimes it just can't be.  Most clergy will stop the ceremony & privately see if there really is reason why the couple shouldn't be married.

If the objector still continues they will be escorted from the ceremony.  And if it gets r-e-a-l-l-y bad, there's always the police.

Answer 15

I went to a wedding this month and nowhere in the ceremony did they say the "speak now or forever hold your peace"

I don't think they actually do this in weddings.

Answer 16

I have never seen this at a wedding before. but now-a-days you can chose rather or not for the priest to say that or not.

Answer 17

I decided for my wedding to have the officiant turn this phrase around.  I had him ask that all those in attendance that approved the wedding and promised to do what they could to support us say "i do"  It was awesome to have everyone there agree that we should get married.

Answer 18

no, only in movies. I think if someone had an objection to the marriage, they would speak before it's taking place.

Answer 19

I have only seen that in the movies....he he.

You don't have to have that in your vows.  You should talk to your clergy, or officiant to make sure your vows are what you like.

Best wishes to you.

Answer 20

They don't say that anymore,

boy if they did though!