When will we admit sexual monogamy is contrary to male human nature, and stop shaming men for being human?

Question

John Edwards is just the latest. I'm so sick of hearing men apologize for being men, because part of our governing system of superstition is the Christian myth that men should only have s*x with one partner in their lives.

Answer 1

I don't know about only having s*x with one person ever in their lives, but if the man is married then monogamy is something that should be expected, (unless he is a fundamentalist Mormon with three wives).

I don't understand all the guys who feel the need to  have relations with a bunch of different chicks.  My understanding of love, especially with a sexual partner, is that you love them so much that you just can't think about anyone else.  I would think that if you are looking to fulfill yourself with some one other than who you are with, then you aren't with the right person.  It seems like all you would have to do is break up with whomever it isn't working with and you could save yourself a bunch of trouble.

I'm not sure that really is normal male human nature.  It sounds to me like some one who is having s*x with two different people behind the others back is just causing themselves unnecessary trouble instead of taking care of things, being decisive, and really caring for the other person's feelings.

What if your girl was sleeping around?  Wouldn't you think she was a hoe?  What I want to know is why there should be a double standard for dudes and chicks about monogamy?  I think that for both sexes it should be one partner at a time, be considerate of them and their feelings, and break things off if it isn't working and move on.

But I agree with you about Christians.  They can be totally crazy sometimes with what they say will send you to h**l and what not.  Most of the time what they say is just a device to controll you anyway.

Enough said.

Answer 2

Never , until women loose their suffrage :P

Men CAN be monogamous

but it is not practical , and would be better in a more loosly defined system , where you cold sleep with others and still be considered just as loyal by our society

Answer 3

Plenty of men manage to have s*x with one partner and remain faithful. I give them credit for that. I guess they have more character and control over their behavior than the rest.

Edit: A man has a choice not to commit to a woman if he wants that sort of lifestyle. What is wrong is the dishonesty, selfishness, and lack of empathy if he chooses to pretend he is committed to one woman.

Answer 4

Based on that "rationality" then, it should be acceptable for women to stray from a monogamous relationship too, right? What's good for the goose is good for the gander? If it's just instinctual for the male of a given species to copulate with as many females as possible in the hopes of carrying on his genetic material through his offspring, then isn't it only right that the female also being given the right to uh...wander, in the hopes of finding that Alpha Male capable of yielding strong, viable offspring?

Since you would like to believe that monogamy is a Christian "myth", that must mean that you are trying to look at this from a Darwinian, biological standpoint, correct? Humans are animals and it's just human [male] nature to cheat? You can't compare humans to other animals. We posses the cognition and the ability [will power] to control our own urges and impulses, where animals do not. For most humans, the need to have s*x is not an instinctual need to reproduce--it's a matter of obtaining that which gives us pleasure.

I'm tired of hearing this excuse that "men are just being men" or men are "just acting according to human nature" when one cheats. It's one thing to cheat on a partner that one is not married to or involved in a committed relationship with. But when a man (or a woman) is unfaithful after professing to love, honor and remain faithful to their partner (until death do us part?), there is no excuse. If a person has an issue with monogamy or committing themselves to their partner, they should never say those vows to begin with. Either you believe and accept all that you avow and remain monogamous, or you avoid putting yourself in such a postion because you don't believe in monogamy. It's as simple as that.

Answer 5

Oh i agree whole-heartedly, after all men are pumped full of testosterone and therefore cannot control themselves AT ALL. Especially when they are being seduced by a barely legal, scantily-clad woman. God forbid she takes her clothes off and the man can't even contain his excitment that there's not only adultery committed, there is also a crime: Rape.

Answer 6

Hung up any?  This whole thing we call "human society" is based on being better than "human nature".  That's why we have laws telling us not to beat each other up, not to take each other's things, the whole big ball o' wax.

In any event, as a married man, he took upon himself the obligation NOT to something like that.  He voluntarily made a promise to his wife.  That's the problem here.

And btw, it's not that "Christian myth", monogamy has been the expected standard throughout most of Western culture.

Answer 7

just because men aren't 'meant to be' monogamous in terms of evolution does NOT mean they can't be monogamous, and it doesn't mean that it's alright for them to cheat. don't tell me men have no control over who they sleep with.or that it should be socially acceptable for men to sleep around when they're committed to another

  

Answer 8

Hahahahahahahaha!  Start thinking with head on your shoulders. The head you're thinking with now is too small to have a brain.

Answer 9

I've never had a problem being faithful, but I'm more manly than most men.  I understand what you say when you talk about the "biological drive" to spread your seed.  In general, it all comes down to taking the other person's feelings into account.  Men would never cheat if they could understand how it will make their partner feel if they find out.  Same goes for women.  

Well...I shouldn't say never.  Some people are just c**ksuckers.

Answer 10

I know, what's wrong with them?! I mean it's not like we could get STDs or anything. Oh, and of course we shouldn't care about love. Let's just knock people up and keep overpopulating the world instead!