When you've done a favor for someone do you constantly throw it back in their face?

Question

Or do you try to control them because you did them favor? Ever since I was teenager I hated asking anyone for anything. I guess because growing up whenever my stepfather would do anything for anyone he would throw it in their face or use it against them.

Answer 1

No ... and No.

When I do a favor for someone, I do it because I care.  There is nothing expected in return, and it is not marked as a tally towards any reward I think I may deserve.

A favor is a favor -- it is a gift.

Not everyone is like your stepfather.

Answer 2

Don't throw it back in their face...and do not try to control them...you can do favors without expecting something in return.  If they don't return the favor...just get on with life...you don't need to lose friends over this.

Answer 3

Your question is more than a rant than a question. (That's okay, I like rants! :)  ) The way you phrase it, "or do you constantly throw it back in their face?", is indicative that you're already aware of the proper etiquette concerning favors.  Of course, most of us know that when someone does you a favor, you graciously accept and it's typically good practice to return a favor later on down the road. However, it is by all means not okay to expect a favor in return.  Friends, at least good ones, occasionally do favors for one another, but not because they are obligated to one another.

I hope someone does a really nice favor for you (without you asking for it), and then never brings it up again.  :)

Answer 4

Neither

Answer 5

when you do a favor for someone you forget about  it because it was a kind thing to do, however, there are  some people that needs to be reminded what you did for them... bd

Answer 6

I feel the same way. That's why I don't like people doing me favors. I even dislike saying thank you. So to avoid saying thank you, I avoid people doing things for me.

Answer 7

People do it to me. My former foster family. Now my former foster sister did this to me. I had the $$ to buy my own food, & then she said it was pointless for me to buy my own food, when she was buying for the whole house. Next thing you know, she said, "I gotta FEED yo' fat @$$ every day!" I said, "No, u ain't gotta feed ME every day. I can provide for myself, thank you very much."

Answer 8

A favour is a gift and a gift should be given with no strings attached.

Answer 9

No, I never do that.

When I do something for someone .. I simply do it .. and they never hear about it again .. and I expect nothing ever.

There are people who do as you mentioned - and they will never be any other way.   If you can, just learn not to do as they have done.

Answer 10

I try not to ...

I had the same kind of thing growing up.  And worse, a lot of the time they felt any favor they did for me means that I owe them something.  Even I didn't want whatever it was to begin with.  Which of course means you can't do anything nice for them without them being suspicious.  

The last time I had a nice Christmas at my parent's house my Mom was telling me how nice everything was, and my step-Dad rolls his eyes and says, well of course she did a lot, she owes us so much.  And then Mom says, oh, that's right ... and that was the end of that.

Answer 11

It is tasteless to do that. Any favor or any gift should have no strings attached to it

Answer 12

A mature person should avoid using favors against the people they've done them for. A 'favor' implies something will be done, without asking for anything in return, after all. I personally avoid bringing up past favors in fights or daily life, unless I'm simply looking for a reasonable favor of my own.