When you get engaged, does the guy pick out the girls actual ring? Do they pick it out together?

Question

I never understood that. Does the guy just go pick a ring out and then ask the girl to marry him? Do they go pick out a ring together and then the guy just waits for the right time to ask? Does the guy give her a 'fake' ring and then they go pick out a real one after he asks her to marry him? How does it work?

Oh, and is the engagement ring the one you'll wear for the rest of your life, and on your wedding day you get the 'band' part of it?

Or is the engagement ring just a great ring you get to have and then you get a different wedding ring?

Answer 1

My husband didn't know what I wanted.  We went together and looked several places until I found one I really liked.  I didn't pick it and say, "yes, that's the ring, buy it for me."  I expected him to maybe go shopping again later on his own or take one of my friends with him but he went back the next day and bought it.  He still surprised me!

I got a diamond engagement ring which I still wear and a matching band is what he put on my finger on our wedding day.  Its becoming more common though to pick a more elaborate engagement ring and not get a separate wedding band.  In those cases, the husband just slipped the engagement ring back on the finger during the ceremony.

Answer 2

It depends. Some do go looking together and with some, the man just picks it out.

Answer 3

I've been married for over 3yrs. My husband, then boyfriend, was the one who surprised me with the engagement ring. I think it's more of a surprise if you allow him to choose the ring. Let him show you how creative he can be. There's no need for fake rings, in my opinion.

The engagement ring is the one that you'll wear on your wedding day, and for the rest of your life if you choose to. My husband and I have been contemplating the idea of buying different rings including the engagement ring. So, it's up to you if you want to wear the engagement ring for ever and ever.

Answer 4

Get ideas from her and than go looking.Mine did that.

Answer 5

Couples can do it any way they want. All of the ways you talked about are acceptable. It really depends on the couple.

You get your wedding band on your wedding day. You can wear both it and the engagement ring forever. Or do it however you want. My mother-in-law hardly ever wears her engagement ring, but they live on a farm and she is always riding horses and such.

I only have one ring - it is a square amethyst. On our wedding day, I handed that over, and that is the ring we were wed with. My husband, however, had wanted his own engagement band. He also got a wedding band. So HE is the one with two rings!

Answer 6

Usually they are bought in a set you get the engagement ring (which is usually a solitaire diamond) and then you get the wedding band when you get married.

Depending on the couple you can pick out rings together I picked mine out and we bought it together.

Some guys buy rings and propose w/ those, if the girl doesn't like it it can be exchanged and depending on the guy their feelings usually aren't hurt by this.

But the engagement ring you wear for the rest of your life unless you upgrade to say a bigger diamond. You don't HAVE to wear it forever but that's what is ~supposed~ to happen. :)

Answer 7

Whatever is good for the couple is just fine.

For some couples, the fellow buys the ring on his own.  For other couples, they pick out the ring together.

Answer 8

The guy picks it...it's supposed to be a surprise.

Answer 9

Couples do ALL of those things! Some people want the engagement to be a complete surprise, so the man picks out the ring on his own (maybe based on suggestions from the woman's mom or best friend). Some couples look at rings beforehand to get an idea of what they like, and they may or may not decide on THE ring that day. The man might go back afterward and pick up one that the woman liked. Some men just propose, and then take their fiancees to go look at rings afterward. Some men pick out the diamond and give it in a generic band, and then take the woman to choose her own band and side stones, and they have the big diamond reset. Some people never do engagement rings, some propose with a different piece of jewelry (or shoes!).

At the wedding ceremony, the couples exchange wedding bands. A woman may choose to wear both of her rings (engagement and wedding) as a set, or she may just wear the wedding band, or she may not wear either of them (my mom doesn't, she's a nurse and it's not convenient to have rings on when she's working). It's really up to the couple - there is absolutely no right or wrong way to go about picking out, giving, or wearing an engagement ring.

Answer 10

I think it's very special when the man chooses the rings. My husband picked out mine, and they are beautiful! Of course some women are picky and 'must have' a certain ring, but then I think that takes away the surprise factor - and also, it's better when the man chooses, because he can pick something which fits his budget. There's nothing wrong with pointing out styles you like, though, because most styles can be found in all price ranges.

There are sets available, which can be great to get since the wedding band totally matches and fits with the engagement ring.

Answer 11

Well I just got engaged about a week and a half ago and to be honest the way he did it was smart because I was honestly surprised. The way he did it was whenever we went to the mall and passed the jewelry shops I would want to look at the necklaces or the rings and see what I liked. He took notice to what I liked. Don't let her know what you're doing, it comes better as a heartfelt moment when she doesn't even see it coming.

My best advice for you is listen in on what she likes if she isn't giving you a lot of info on that subject call her mother and ask her what she likes the most or if she knows. If that doesn't work take her into one and tell her to pick one out that she likes and propose right there. But defiantly do not let her know what you are planning. She'll love it however you do it because you are asking her to spend the rest of her life with you I'm sure she'll love anything you do and I hope all goes well.

Oh and another thing make sure it is the right height (how high it sits on her finger) too high hurts and it will catch on everything.

The actual wedding ring you pick out together, the way I would go is get a very nice engagement ring and then get just a nice band to go around the actual ring itself.