When you get married should there be a girls/guys night out?

Question

Im not married but i was thinking if that day ever comes should that be allowed? I was talking to my mom and dad and they are pretty old school.They said once you get married the hubby or wife should always go out together because guys/girls night out can lead to temptation and drinking impairs judegment and next thing you know you made a mistake by having a one night stand or an affair.

Also should one have lots of friends or better a few close friends you can count on? my friend got married and he says he cut off alot of friends and only kept me as a friend because he says guys can make a pass or have s*x with your wife while you are not around. Is that something to keep in mind too?

Answer 1

Yes, we have a guys night out or a poker night ever 2 months

Answer 2

That is stupid. Guys and Girls need time away from each other. You should have trust in your partner. Not the constant need to supervise them because they might cheat. If you have a spouse like that then you shouldn't be married in the first place. A girls night does not always mean drinking in a bar. I have plenty of girls nights where we just go have dinner together and go home. Or we go to a movie or have brunch. My  husband gets together with his guy friends to play poker. No biggie.  

Answer 3

We don't make separate plans, but spontaneously he will go hang w the guys or I will go hang w the girls, no biggie...mostly we want to be together though.

Answer 4

Your parents and friend gave very good advice. If more couples abided by that, they would not have the problems that they have today.  

Answer 5

i think almost every one would cheat if they are in the right place at the right time sorry but that's what i think

Answer 6

You should definitely have a few close friends whom you know you can trust and count on no matter what.  of course, you will always lean on your family and have them, but you also want your friends.  The more you have, the less likely it is that you have a better relationship with them, and the more likely that they will want to open up to you and be close to you.  I had a lot of friends, and I started realizing that some of them were just my "friends" because we went out..but I knew nothing really about their personal lives and they wouldn't really talk to me about stuff, and neither did I.  And this was because I couldn't trust them.  So I cut them off.  Keep a few, and let those few earn your friendship.  

Answer 7

I go to dinner with my girlfriends every couple of weeks.  My husband plays basketball with his guy friends.  Just because you get married doesn't mean you can't be social.

Answer 8

honestly hun,the temptation/affair thing can happen irregardless if you or your spouse has a girl/guys night out.I am recently married, like 4 weeks married, and me and my girlfriends still goes out now and again, not as often as before like when i was single, or even engaged, but i still keep my girl's night out available for my girl's, and so does my hubby with his boys, so it all boils down to love, respect, and faithfulness, once these things are established in your marriage then there will be no desire to cheat, once u love your spouse and he loves you.

Answer 9

Of course guys can go out with their friends after they are married and girls can go out with her friends. I would say not only is it acceptable, but it's HEALTHY to still keep individual friends and activities after you get married. If you can't trust your spouse while they are out with their friends, it is a problem.

As far as whether to have a few close friends or a lot of friends... that's up to the person. :) It could ebb and flow throughout life as well... maybe you only have time for a few close friends right now, but in years to come, you will have time for more- or vice versa. Just relax and see how it pans out.

Answer 10

Always in moderation. It's ok to have girls/guys night sometimes, but the couple should go out as well. Just find the balance.

Answer 11

your friend is an idiot , who has no trust in his own friends . And , sorry but , your parents aren't too swift either.

I would get rid of a "friend" who thought I might sleep with his wife . Simply because , he's not a real friend.  Friends trust each other.

  And so should spouses.

Answer 12

It depends on where you go.

Married people don't need to go to bars and clubs to drink and dance with single people.

Married women can go out with friends for dinner, movies, shopping, beauty treatments, theater, etc.

Married men can go out with friends to sporting events, cards, movies, etc.

Answer 13

the guy should watch Ronin with his buddies at the apartment clubhouse movie theater rented out for that night, before the wedding.

the gir should engage in a 48 hour scrapbooking party with her girlfriends 2 days before the wedding.

Yes.

Answer 14

I have seen it both ways. I have seen couples have a night out seperate and be ok with it ...and in my situation when I started letting my wife have a night out...she cheated on me and now we are divorced. And my favorite the entire time when I was deciding what you was deciding..." But you have to trust me!"  yeah right.

Answer 15

I think your parents are living in the dark ages however I am not sure of your cultural background so perhaps this is common with your background.  I think it is very important for married people to get out with their friends without their spouse.  There is no harm in it assuming you are not going out and getting drunk and flirting with members of the opposite s*x.  You shouldn't give up your friends after you get married.  You may be married but you are still an individual and need your own friends and interests.

Answer 16

well they are still together so you know a point of view from the results hey? :). Personally I don't see a distinction between sexes. My s.o is my best mate so I really enjoy hanging with her and she is just part of the crew. I do trust her though so when she does the girls nights out it is cool as well.  

Answer 17

Yea guys and girls nights out are fine.   As long as they are just that, none of this yea going on a guys night out and a couple of the guys are girls or vice versa.

Your other friend is right though about friends making passes and stuff on your signifigant other.  You know the people your friends with and you know their history, you know which ones you can trust and which you can't.

Answer 18

My advice, Don't get married. The guy is the looser every time. She will almost always cheat, then blame the husband and proceed to clean him out of home, money, self esteem, and self respect. Do yourself a huge favor . . . stay single.