When you were a child, did you ever..?

Question

When you were a child, did you ever imagine God (if you believed in a god) might not love you because of your thoughts or actions?

I know better now, but as a kid I didn't. I'm just asking all these questions because I'm trying to put the pieces together to figure out why everyone (in real life) thinks I'm so eccentric and if I am, then why?

Experiences from anyone and from any background or sexual orientation are helpful. Thanks.

Answer 1

I was always thinking that God was angry and upset with me not so much because I was g*y, but because I could not stop my g*y thoughts or masturbating.  After a while I might stop feeling so guilty, but then I'd make myself feel guilty for becoming so hardhearted.

Now I'm the kind of person that always thinks someone is upset with me, and I have a big propensity for guilt.  And relationships and friendships over time always start to make me feel trapped, because I feel like people who know me well will eventually start to dislike me, and it's only a matter of time before I p**s them off.

Anyway, that may also be because of my parents' constant and severe fighting when I was growing up, and my mom's recurrent health issues.  I grew up feeling like anything that stresses out my mom and dad could potentially make them die.

Answer 2

Thankfully my parents taught me that God loves everyone.  That's it.  You be a good person and He loves, you are a bad person, and he still loves you.  They never brought up a condemning side of God, so I never even considered that he might not love me.

Answer 3

I was raised to believe that being g*y was a sin, and it made my life miserable. I believed in God, and loved God, but couldn't change who I am. So I did my homework. I learned to read Hebrew and Greek, and read the Bible for myself... in the original languages. Quite an awakening. In the original languages, God never condemned homosexuality, and same-s*x marriages were recorded in the Old Testament!

Understanding that God loved me as I am was only half the battle... the other half was learning to love myself. And in time, I did.

Answer 4

I belived every second of my life, god will strick me down for being g*y.

and all the sudden just send me only to h**l,

and i wont see noone i love ever.

:o

BUT THATS WHEN I BELIVED IN HIM.

U_U

to think i was gona try to change my natrual life for someone i dont even know. -_-

Answer 5

Yes I did. I will imagine that God doesnt favor me if I did something bad.

Answer 6

I never believed in "God" I personal went off of my Personal Beliefs.

Answer 7

im extreemly scared to go to h**l so i told myself that if god loves everyone he loves me . and im hoping if the bible is toatally true he put the g*y part as a test to teach us to love people for their differences no matter what :P i know that sounds stupid but it helps me sleep at night

Answer 8

i always thought he was ignoring me. i would always pray for my life to be better but it never did. thats when i realized their was no god and if you wanted something you had to make it happen yourself.

Answer 9

Yes I have, but now I don't believe in him.

Answer 10

I always thought God hated me.

I thought to myself that he was always too busy making other peoples lives so great that's why mine sucks.

Answer 11

i totally agree with taylor.. good job bud