When you were growing up were your parents strict? And are you as strict today with your children?

Question

When you were growing up were your parents strict? And are you as strict today with your children?

Answer 1

I was very scared of my father. The generation gap between my daughter and I is considerably less than with that of my father.

Answer 2

My parents were a bit strict in some ways, but I had a lot of leaway cos I was sensible.

I'm way over protective of my own kids.

I do wrap them up in cotton wool, and I know it's wrong but just can't help it.

I'd rather be safe than sorry...

Answer 3

My parents demanded good manners and consideration for others.  They also demanded that I was home on time and respected their home.  Yes, I did raise my children in the same way and am pleased to say that they are now raising my grandchildren to be polite and helpful human beings.

Answer 4

My parents were extremely strict and over protected to the point that I couldn't enjoy my youth ....i have a bit of resentment ..

I  have two cats and they are free to do what they please...lol  

Answer 5

My Mum was firm but fair.  She was a single parent and therefore had to cover the role of our dad as well, and I think she did it brilliantly.

She taught us to respect others and she learnt us the value of money.  We never had any money and we were dressed from the market stalls (or sometimes, to my shame at the time, she made our clothes).  We never got much pocket money and I've had a job of some sort now since I was 14 to pay for things I wanted.

If my Mum said no to something we'd throw a tantrum, but looking back she did it for our benefit.

I don't have any children but if/when I do, I'd like to think I'd treat them how my Mum treated me and my sister.  She did a fab job if I do say so myself :-)

Answer 6

My parents were waaaayy to lenient. My children are grown up now, we were fairly strict with them when they were growing up and I am glad we were. They turned out to be two lovely young people both married and in good jobs.

Edit Shambo: There is a difference between being strict and physical abuse.

Answer 7

Yes I got the slipper if i was naughty. I don't have any kids and am not convinced I want any either but if I did I wouldn't lower myself to beating the c**p out of them.  

Answer 8

My parents were WAYYY overly strict, overly protective, and quick to punish.

I'm absolutely the opposite because I swore I would never raise my kids the way I was raised.

I would not call myself permissive, but I do pick and choose my battles carefully.  I am strict about the (few) things that are a matter of (potential) life or death, and proper manners, etc.

But I let the rest go.

Answer 9

Unbelievably strict.  I am not so strict with mine, but I do insist on knowing who they are going out with, where to and ETA return.  I expect high standards of morals and behaviour,  but they are permitted more than I was allowed - which was VICTORIAN!

Answer 10

Very strict and I never wanted children.

Answer 11

My mum was very strict, my dad was a pushover. I am quite strict with my kids, but not in an overbearing way. I won't let them get away with rudeness or being disrespectful, and as a result they are both very well behaved. They have their moments at home of course, but they always behave themselves at school and socially which is the main thing. I probably am over-protective towards them, but I don't live in a very good area and their safety is the most important thing.

Answer 12

i'm 54. my parents were strict with a lot of things. when i was young, at the weekends or holidays we would go out to play after breakfast, with a sandwich for out lunch and not come home till we were hungry in the late afternoon.  i wasn't allowed a boyfriend till i was 16. imagine telling that to todays kids...lol.

i had to be in for a certain time, got smacked for being rude or naughty. i was brought up to say please and thank you, and respect my elders. i wasn't allowed to go to some of the dances out of town like some kids were, and i was angry with them for it. but now as a mother i understand why they did it. but i loved them dearly and i had the utmost respect for them till the day they died.

in turn i was strict with my kids, but mine were teens in the late 80's early 90's, and things had changed. they got out to stay a bit later than i did and got a bit more freedom as teens for staying out. but they still had to be in at a time i told them. i smacked them when they were younger for being cheeky or naughty. i told my oldest if he got the belt at school not to come home moaning about it as he probably got it for a reason. i was once told that my three were the only ones that said please and thank you in a certain shop. i pumped manners into them. and also to respect their elders. they got grounded and i never backed down, no matter how much they pleaded to get out. they are all well balanced happy adults with good lives and jobs and kids of their own.

they in turn have brought up my grandchildren the same as i did them. i'm often told how polite and well behaved grand kids ive got. we can take them anywhere...all six of them. but they are normal kids and go out and play and get dirty, thats the way it should be. they are not allowed to stay in all day and play at a pc or watch tv. if its nice, they are out playing on their bikes etc.  I am never so proud as when i take them into a cafe or restaurant and each one of them aged from 5 to 10 says thank you very much when something is put down in front of them,. then i know my mother, myself and my kids have done a great job.  and yes! my grand kids get smacks too. it does them  NO!! harm. i wish all the do gooders would try and believe that. then we would have a lot better behaved kids nowadays if they learned some old fashioned discipline.

Shambo.....their is a huge difference between smacking your kids on the bum or the back of the hand and "beating the c**p out of them"

two different things altogether!

Answer 13

I had boundaries, but freedoms within them. The perfect balance I think. My kids are too young for me to be anything other than overprotective, but when the time comes that they can go out and play, and make their own decisions, they will have exactly the same freedoms I had. But with rules too. They will be punished with things that make them think, I will never, ever smack them. That is just my personal way of parenting, I don't want to knock anyone who thinks differently, but I don't condone abuse either.

Answer 14

I was more strict than my own parents.

Answer 15

When growing up parents were indeed strict when compared today with children of today. It  should be noted that  in those days children were less informed but now thro Tele visions and other modes of communications children too know the world better. My friend used to tell that when his Dad takes him to shop and ask for anything he wanted he did not have an answer but now children know what to ask as they are well informed thro effective communications.

Answer 16

I had set rules to follow and I passed that parenting onto my children. Now my grandchildren are experiencing the same positive controls. Physical activities were not needed because from an early age children accept discipline but if they are left to build resistance to parenting things get bad.

Answer 17

I would say my mom was the strict parent and my dad was more laid-back and calm.  One of the things I grew up with was an "open-door" policy (at all times).  I wasn't allowed to close my bedroom door for privacy.  I guess it was just a means of control.  I'd just go into the bathroom for privacy.  I'm going to try to find a happy medium when raising my children.

Answer 18

My parents were very very strict.  I was bought up in absolute poverty but while I didn't have the material things in life, they respected me, loved me and invested all of their time in me and my siblings.  I am successful because of all the things they taught me.  I don't have children and don't want them but if I had them, I would teach the same morals and respect for others as my parents taught me.  

Answer 19

oh god yeah....and the irony of it was the stricter they were...the more I would rebel and just get into more trouble. it was a bad circle.

If I ever have kids I truly believe I would not treat them the same way myself and my siblings were treated. I will NEVER lay a finger on them and hope to communicate openly. of course there will be rules and boundaries, but freedom to make choices and learn from experience etc.

....hopefully.lol

Answer 20

My sted-dad is such as a soft touch I could get away with anything with him

My mum on the other hand was quite strict and would think nothing of giving me slap round the head when I'd gone too far

I used to be terrified of her (in a good way not a bad way)

My son is only 2 but i don't think im strict with him

His dad is though so it kinda balances it out

He's such a well behaved little boy, he does have his moments as all 2 years have but on a whole he's great

I'm sure that'll change as he gets older

Answer 21

My parents were strict by today's standards.  They came out of Victorian environments.  I was generally less strict except on some moral issues.  My children are now sometimes more strict than I was with their children.  I think it's because my grandchildren have a more dangerous world to live in.

Answer 22

my mum was quite strict but then i was bad lol

parents are too lenient nowadays thats why kids are a pain in the butt now

Answer 23

yup..of course i wuz a child who knows what might of happened if they weren't strict

and i can't answer that 1 cuz im 14 atm so i don't ave ne children  

Answer 24

my parents were strict but im not strict on my daughter

Answer 25

im from irish catholic back ground yes my parents where far too strict with me and my brothers ( 5of um lol ) but more so with me , (only girl ) im kinda glad they where in a sense , even though at the time i thought they were like ott but now i realise it was for my own good !! id like to think i would be strict but fair in my dealing with my children as rules need to be obeyed by all , and rules make the world turn around or there ould be mayhem