Where does the myth that "foreign women are submissive angels" originate?

Question

Louise, the divorce rate has dropped. And besides, the younger the kids are when they marry the more likely they are to divorce later on. By contrast, people whose first marriage is in their 30's - and beyond - almost never divorce.

Answer 1

Well, if some American men prefer to marry foreign women,there's not a lot that can be done about it, is there?  American women have careers and other things, so i suppose they can do without men. Isn't that what Women's Lib was supposed to be about "a woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle" etc? And there must be some American men who get on with American women, otherwise there wouldn't be any American women getting married at all, though they clearly are (the Marriage and Divorce section on here is full of them).

Answer 2

Cultures and cultural expectations vary hugely, and some of the differences are not obvious to tourists who are in the country for a few days, or who simply read about the place on a website or brochure.

In Australia, most foreign 'brides' come from two or three Asian countries, although Russia is catching up.

In some Asian countries, arranged marriages are frequent, and women are traditionally subdued in public.

This may lead casual visitors to believe that "Asian" (in itself a stereotype) women are "submissive" by nature or preference, especially when you WANT to believe that.

Of course, many women from the Asian continent are also smaller in stature than their western counterparts, and can therefore seem quite frail and childlike to bigger, heavier western males.

Many westernere see the living conditions and assume 'poverty' and 'desperation', although in fact for many people the conditions in which they live are just ordinary ~ their ideas about the west are almost entirely fanciful.

Unfortunately, many people who engage in these marriages ~ on both sides ~ are basing their decisions on stereotypes of cultures and conditions they know almost nothing about.

And of course, the hopes, dreams and desires of the individual factor in to create an illusion that things are a certain way ~ all too often a very unrealistic illusion which, when it shatters, can lead to a lot of unhappiness.

Sadly, I also suspect *some* men who marry foreign wives also feel that if she's desperate enough to offer herself for this type of marriage, she is not worth much an can be treated with disrespect.

What's that saying about no-one being able to fool us as well as we can fool ourselves?

Cheers :-)

Answer 3

I'm an American man living in Thailand with my Thai wife. She actually makes more money than me, and she still does the laundry and the cooking.

What do I do for her? I take care of the house, and I've custom built most of our furniture in my wood shop.

We fight sometimes, nothing serious.

Marrying a non-white, non-American woman was definitely the best decision I ever made.

Answer 4

From the fact that feminism did not have the same kind of media coverage there. Also from the fact that divorce rates of Americans to foreign women are 20% while the national average is closing in on 60%, also it isnt about finding a submissive wife, but a good wife. What are your wifely qualities ?

And what do you care ? If you worry about all those evil girls stealing the men marry a nice guy from Africa or Iran or Afghanistan or or or :-)

Answer 5

I'll be honest, here.

I have family in St. Petersburg and I visit them frequently. I'm American. We've been followed and harassed by "western" (such a meaningless term but you know what I'm talking about) men. My Muscovite accent is not very amazing, since I'm a native speaker of another language, I won't exaggerate and say it's good. These men can't tell the difference between me and my American born sisters versus our Russian born cousins. We've spent nights out messing with these guys' heads because they're so incredibly ignorant that it's hilarious. They ask for it and they come to us first, so they get what they deserve and they always end up embarrassed when half of us start speaking American English in the standard American Vernacular accent. Complete hilarity, I need to start videotaping this stuff, you would die laughing. These men are college educated, they're in their 30's and above, they speak decent (I'm still a bit better... enough to fool them, obviously, hahaha) Russian and they're from all over the US, UK and Australia. They have... okay jobs. Not anything amazing 90% of the time. And they THINK they're smart, they THINK they know differences in behavior and appearance between their "cows" they rant about and other women. But we've proved countless times they don't and made them run away red-faced like babies that they are. The only real thing I've noticed they all have in common is that they are all...

1) painfully unattractive

2) overweight

3) have bad attitudes and come waltzing in the place like they're special... you can IMMEDIATELY tell they think they're leagues above Russian men (they aren't, most Russian women prefer Russian men... the bad myths about them on MOB sites are just that... MYTHS) and will shamelessly start drooling on even the ugliest Russian women (there are plenty... there is beauty and ugly everywhere on earth, I've seen it with my own eyes).

The whole ordeal is just hilariously entertaining. You would be surprised just how pitiful they act overseas. American women do not want these men... that's the hidden reason they are over there, pouncing on whoever accidentally looks in their general direction. This sense of rejection has led to an inferiority complex where it became acceptable to trash over 100 million people they don't know anything about, and ones they do know, like their mothers, sisters, aunts, nieces, etc. That is what this is really about- rejection.  As a result, we have American women who now end up with the nicer, more rational American men who don't have racist preferences or creepy ideas of exotification and aren't held back in life by rejection and fear... or they have a lot of great foreign men that they can meet and so on.

Then we have millions of foreign women who now do not allow their daughters anywhere near American, British, etc. men and for good reason. And we have more women who know about their inferiority complex and take advantage of it, wiping them clean of far more money than any American woman could just through expenses like getting a visa, etc. Plus, equal rights are becoming extremely prevalent worldwide and it's only a matter of time before women will be educated on the same level as men on a global scale. That is when it will really hit the fan. Education leads to personal freedom and better opportunities in life based on one's own merit and once all these women get those things they will suddenly be no different than the American, British, etc. women. That is the reality. And men from these countries are rapidly earning a horrid reputation on a global scale... ruining it for any normal man who travels for normal reasons. The same thing is happening in Asia, I've been there as an exchange student and seen it there, too. Same song, different verse. All alike in the end.

So this minority of rejected and socially handicapped men will be (and already are fast becoming) the losers in the end. I say minority because most American men really are great guys who treat women well and believe in equal rights for everyone and truly practice that in their lives. My dad is one of these great men, and every American guy I've ever dated has probably been more "feminist" than I have, hahaha. (I'm 22 so I haven't been married, thus the "dating" term there... I am engaged and will be married when I finish graduate school, however).

That's my take on it and my view is based in a lot of real life experience via traveling and watching things and being the confidant of many foreign girls. And my view is absolutely common both in and out of the US, shared by every female I've ever talked to about this topic. I am certainly not in the minority. You think "western" women talk poorly of this group of guys... YOU SHOULD HEAR THE FOREIGN WOMEN. They would bring these guys to tears. Like I said... we all know who the losers are, here... and a tiny minority of guys with self-esteem problems and cutting tongues are not going to be happy. We already know they are unhappy with their lives or they wouldn't be online 24/7, bickering with each other like children and complaining about everyone all the time.

Answer 6

It's all a lie. These women are so desperate to escape the poverty back home that they are willing to hook up with complete strangers in a foreign country so they can get citizenship and bring their families over.

Answer 7

Possibly it originates from companies offering to hook men up with foreign brides - for a fee of course.

I don't think that any person, male or female is naturally 'submissive' to another person. However, some people who are economically disadvantaged will fake submission in order to get something from you.

Buyer beware. No woman really wants to put herself in a subservient position to anyone. If she appears to be willing to do so, watch out.

Answer 8

I agree.  There are many foreign-born women who are no better than American-born females. But overall  I find them more appreciative for sure, and that is where the myth may have some validity to it..

I personally have had a lot of success with dating American-born women.  But that is only because I only encountered a few, what turned out to be. high maintenance females, who possessed the entitlement attitude. The overwhelming majority of them shared resources, perhaps not dollar for dollar, but they shared nevertheless.

  I think many men encounter the *****-goddess because too many men look too much for physical attractiveness alone.  Once I realized the women really did not care for me, or treated me poorly, she was out.

Answer 9

i have Muslim friends in Muslim countries who are "under the thumb", that is the way it has always been in every country, this "women are powerless" thing has really been over done by western feminists.

i take it as a given women advertising themselves as potential wives on a web site are looking to profit from a male with comparative economic advantage. some people are just naive.

having said that, in my own limited experience, latin american, mid eastern and african girls make better partners than american, australian and european girls and im not saying that the exotic girls are necessarily submissive because they are not, they are just less neurotic, tend to have good diets and have not been brainwashed by negative stereotypes against men.

thumbs down for giving my opinion?