Where should we get married ?? ICK!?

Question

Here's the scoop: we were just engaged a few days ago, and there is ALREADY a fiasco!

1) We live 7 hrs apart.

2) We go to school in the middle.

3) I grew up in my home church and my parents feel VERY strongly that I need to get married at my home church (I am the Bride to be)

4) My fiance wants to get married in the middle where we both live at the moment.

5) I'm concerned that if we get married in my home town, only my friends and family will be there, and he will have very few.

6) all his guy friends are from out of state, and it would make a bachelor party quite difficult I guess...

7) I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO!

I really care what my parents think because they are helping to pay for it, and I want them to be happy/supportive with this, but I also want my hubby to be happy then too... Any ideas? It's craziness and it's only just begun.

Answer 1

I would meet in the middle. You can still get married in a church there! Good luck!

Answer 2

I agree with CareBear;I like to also add; that your parents should come to their senses. And though they are helping with  the cost for you wedding....you should also have say so. Do they like your fiance`? The reason I say that is because that's selfish of your parents to have things one sided...I'm sure some sacrifices were made when they wedded...In the end you still have the last say so; even if it means not having them to help. You do want your future in laws & your fiances friends there...that's only right..Stand your ground.

Answer 3

This wedding is yours and your fiances. But if all of his guy friends are from out of state anyway, they are going to have to travel...whether is be to your home town or to your current location. While your parents are helping to pay for the wedding...do not let them have too much say in what is happening. You don't ever want to look back and wish you did it your way. But it is tradition to get married in the brides church. I agree with your fiance though. Sorry.

Answer 4

The decisions regarding the wedding details usually become the first major proving ground for the leaving and cleaving that is supposed to happen.  You and your fiance are about to form a new family unit separate from both sets of parents.  After hearing all the pros and cons, the TWO OF YOU make the final decision.  Together.  Now is a great time to show your fiance that his opinions matter more than your parents'.  Not that your parents' don't matter; they do.  But your fiance's matter more.

Answer 5

Is there any way that you could get married by the pastor of your home church but in a location that is in the middle?  You could then either find a church that would let you have your pastor (not hard if you are a common denomination or if you have any Unitarian Churches in the area) or you could get married outdoors in nature's splendor.  When you pitch the idea to your parents, remember to mention the part about marriage as working together and compromise.  :-)  

Good Luck!

Answer 6

Well, where are you going to live after you get married? Surely you're not going to stay 7 hours apart!

I'd arrange to do everything where you'll be living once your married - unless you're moving somewhere very far away. But even then, I'd consider it.

You and your fiancee should do what you want to do. But it is nice to be able to drive by or go to the place that you got married once you are settled in together.