Who could make up the funniest 'You're so.. ..' kinda joke, wins 10 points!?

Question

For example.. ..

'You're so fat you could be tracked by GPS'

'You're so fat you couldn't jump for joy'

'You're so stupid, you lost your way in the toilet'

'You're so dumb that taking half of your brain makes you smarter'

'You're so fat that when you fell down in the united states, you landed in england'

'You're so fat you slow the earth down its revolution around the sun'

Answer 1

Your'se so fat, when you buy cloths online, the computer crashes on the weight of your request.

Answer 2

You're so fat you need a map to find your belly button

You're so dumb you threw a rock at the ground and missed

You're so dumb that you sold your car for gas money

You're so fat, your the reason why pluto is a dwarf planet

Answer 3

You are so slow that it takes you an hour and a half to watch 60 minutes.

You are so ugly that you could back lightning up an oak tree.

Answer 4

Your so ugly, peoples acne clear up when they see you.

Answer 5

your so fat the last time you saw 90210 was on the scale.

Answer 6

Your so fat, when you saw a school bus filled with white people, you yelled,"CATCH THAT TWINKIE!"

Your so fat, your fat! Eat it, *****. lol

Your so fat, you have your own orbit.

Your so ugly, you look out the window and get arrested for mooning.

Your so fat, when you get on a scale, it says,"To be continued..."

-more soon-

Answer 7

you're so fat, aliens can spot u from outer space

you're so stupid, they haven invented an IQ score that low.

Answer 8

You're so fat, the back of your neck looks like a pack of hotdogs.

Answer 9

You're so stupid you think George Bush is a type of tree

Answer 10

your so poor you live in a two story dorito bag

Answer 11

You're so phat that you've got your own orbit.

Your so phat that when people say phat beats they think of you.

Answer 12

Your sooo black that you had to wear a white glove so you wouldn't chew your fingers thinking it was a tootsie roll.

Answer 13

You're so not funny you came to yahoo answers looking for someone else to give you material.

Answer 14

ur so ridiculous you look like st. nicholas

ha. i rhymed.

Answer 15

'You're so fat i took a photo of you last christmas and it's still printing out'

'You're so poor we seen your mum kicking a can down the street and we was like "hey lady what you doing?" and she said "moving house"'

'You're so retarded that your birth certificate is an apology from the condom factory'

'You're so stupid you could hit water if you fell out of a boat'

Answer 16

You're so fat you're obese.

Answer 17

your so dumb you make me feel dumber talking to you

Answer 18

Your so ugly they turn off the security cameras in the bank.

Your so stupid you tried to dround a fish.

Answer 19

You're so fat that you use a king sized mattress for a tampon

You're so fat that you're stretch marks are like the New Jersey Turnpike, Long and Dirty