Who is being unreasonable here? Please help me - URGENT?

Question

Im a 16 year old female and live with my dad, stepmom and 2 little sisters. Its kinda weird because i have a horse and my biological mom (mary), has one at the same yard although i rarely see her because of shifts at work. My dad & stepmom had gone on holiday, my 2 little sisters are staying with their aunt and i'm staying with my bio-mom. She booked a holiday at work so she wasn't on funny shifts whilst i was there so now we are at the yard at the same time. I always hack my horse out around the forest nearby but now my mom won't let me. She says it's too dangerous for me to go on my own eventhough i do it all the time anyway. I have tried to explain this to her but she wont have it. I am quite a rebellious, argumentative, disobedient person normally & cause h**l at home but i don't know how long i can put up with my bio-mom - she's drivin me insane! My curfew at home is 11pm, mary changed it to 10pm! I do anything i want with my horse & mates & boyfriend usually but she is restricting EVERYTHING! The other day my curfew drove me insane so i stayed out with mates & boyfriend and got drunk & came in at 3am. She grounded me so i snuck out & she caught me after 2 1/2 hours. I curse at eveyone n my bio-mom, stepmom and dad don't like it but i can't care! I'm staying with my mom for another week! Who is being unreasonable here? I think it's mary but she thinks i's me! She is constantly shoutin at me even though i do deserve most of it. Can you lot just give me your thoughts on this and any advice please. I am always in trouble at school too and often skip it...i've tried to stop this but i end up walking out of class! Please help me. Mary is married to my stepdad, Scott and he feels the same as mary!

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Answer 1

just say **** u again and ignore her best u can lol and btw to anyone whose gonna be a ***** when they read this dude cmon **** u man

Answer 2

Okay people chill out, she's 16. Let her have her 16-year-old fun.

I think you have a point. She had no right to put limits on everything like she did. I think that was uncalled for. It just made you rebel, her plan did not work. She just needs to chill out and let you be a teenager.

:)

Answer 3

I would send you back to your dad's.  Well either that or bend you over my knee like you were 3... hey wait maybe they should have done that when you were 3 and you wouldn't be in this perdicament that you are causing now.

Answer 4

you're a brat, sorry to say it.   You don't freaking pay the bills or old enough to make it on your own and need to have some authority in your life or else your going to be big looser.  

Answer 5

You are in her house, you need to follow her rules, no matter how "childish" they may seem to you.  If it is only for a week more, let it go, accept your fate, and try to get along with the others in the house.

Parents do not always agree on how to raise a child.  Having parents in two different households, with two different sets of rules can be frustrating to a teenager.  

Some questions you may want to consider are:

1.  Are they trying to look out for your safety by setting rules?

2.  Do you care for their feelings at all?  If so, do you feel that your actions cause worry, stress, and frustration?

3.  Will your friends and boyfriend understand that you need to follow a different set of rules for a short period of time?  If not, are they really friends worth having?

I would have to say that if you were my child and you left the house without permission and came home drunk I would have called the police so that they could question you and find out who was providing you with alcohol.  I would have called the police and reported you as a runaway if you left the house again without permission.  I would also have contacted your father to let him know what you were up to so that when you returned home to him, he would maybe provide more restrictions on you.  I would have become your worst nightmare.

As a teenager I made some poor choices.  I had s*x for the first time when I was 14 and had a beautiful baby boy nine months later.  I lived with a single parent, my mom, and she deserved respect.  I tried to get along with her and accept her rules even after becoming a mom, because I still lived with her.

There are dangers that are not always noticable to teens or younger children.  Mothers tend to worry more than fathers when it comes to safety.  Try to see your mother's side.  Work on communication your feelings to her without being confruntational.  If you show respect, you get respect.

Answer 6

You're being unreasonable, selfish, disrespectful, and immature. Need I say any more?

My advice? Grow up and start acting your age. Then maybe people would treat you like a 16 year old instead of a 12 year old. Talking back, cussing, and drinking enough to get drunk at your age is not "cool" nor is it mature.

Answer 7

I have a feeling that this is a troll question because no one can be as ignorant as this and not know WHY they are being put on restriction.

Answer 8

At 16, you're acting your age. However, your bio-mom is not in the wrong. Her lifestyle isn't going to be exactly like your father's/step-mother's, so, her rules are going to be a tad different. Going out and getting drunk is silly, you're 16, do you want to spend time in juvy over something so stupid? You sound like you need to grow up and become more responsible. 16 is a hard age; it's the age where you think you're an adult now and able to do things your way. Unfortunately for you, you're not, and you need to listen to the rules. Once you get out on your own and mature a bit more, you'll understand that your bio-mother isn't the monster that you're making her out to be, and, in fact, you are. You'll have the mother's curse: "I hope your daughter acts JUST like you".

Answer 9

I think you need to act the age you want to be treated, and grow up a little bit and stop throwing these selfish temper tantrums. You have alot more than girls your age. I agree you should have a curfew and if it is broken you should expect punishments for it.

Getting drunk at 16 isnt clever and it not worth doing as you will end up killing ya self. ITS NOT A COOL THING TO DO EITHER.

As I say grow up and get on with your parents.

Answer 10

whomever you are staying with, you need to respect their wishes.  it may not be what you are use to doing, but you can tough it out until your dad gets backs.  rebelling is not the answer, it just makes things worse on you.

Answer 11

listen dont shout or swear because it makes you seem common and immature.

but the fact is she gave up custody of you and she doesnt have any real juristiction over you

but look at it form her point of view , you 16 so you not a kid but woman are vunrable wether your ready to admit it or not and shes just worried about you , the fact is your probably fine in the woods but shes just worried.

manners dont cost anything , if you dont like what shes doing dont act like a spoilt brat about it use logical arguments and explaination.