Who should i appoint legal power of attorney?

Question

ugh, i dont know what to do, i have to appoint a legal power of attorney in case i ever end up incapacitated. i have no family to appoint, or else obviously i wouldnt need to appoint anyone. However, i dont know who to appoint. I have 3 options or a combination of these people:

1. a solicitor, whom i guess i speak to and can make my wishes known, he at least may be wise to appoint as a financial advisor type thing.

2. my female friend aged 35, known her for twelve years, tho we dont often see each other maybe once every four months or so. she doesnt really understand how i "think" or what i would want i dare say but she is sensible and practical, even if a bit ignorant to my lifes complexities.

3. male friend who is 26 whom i see once per week who would do absolutely anything for me, he would probably even die for me. known him for six years, though he had moved away at times so we havent spent that much time together in the past tho he has moved back and have spent loads of time together since end of june. he is very helpful and helps run errands, garden etc for me. BUT he is romantically interested i think so it may be a disaster if i appoint him then we have a falling out or something, he may be overwhelmed with the responsibility or who knows, force me to marry him if im under his power haha joke. well, kind of.

anyway, these are my only three options and i dont know what to do, who should i appoint? i thought at least the lawyers for financial aspects jointly with someone else, but which one? or do i appoint all three and they can come to compromises themselves on my welfare?

still, my dad named his gf next of kin and he went into hospital after they had broken up so it was a ridiculous situation, thats why im worried that my friend is romantically interested in me, in case we fall out over it or whatever. i need to appoint some people to cover my back legally. anyway, who should i appoint? thanks

Answer 1

         Poppy,

            I've followed your questions for quite some time and am        

         amazed  at  broad interests and concerns. First appoint a

         lawyer as your executor. Keep family and friends out of it.Too

         many times family and friends end up at odds over wills

         probate expenses,etc.As for your medical decisions,here in

         the states we have a form appointing a health care surrogate

         and a secondary surrogate who can make decisions on your

         behalf regarding health issues should you become unable to do

         so. The forms spell out your wishes concerning your treatments

         in life threatening situations, organ donations, etc. The mental

         aspect is much more complicated and depends on many

         things. Institutionalized,declared mentally incompetent, etc.

              Of course you could appoint me, which would mean I'd have

         to come to the UK frequently to check on you and ,of course,

         your culinary skills.

Answer 2

I would go with the lawyer.  I think that's too important of a role in your life to turn over to a friend or an acquaintance.  The lawyer is not going to try to exploit the situation for his own (or anyone else's) personal gain, and he's going to know exactly what his role and limits are within the confines of the law.

Answer 3

Oh Poppy my friend that is a hard one. You could appoint your girl friend but make sure she knows your wishes, you could also appoint your lawyer to over see her so your wishes are adhered to.