Who wants to be a millionaire PCB Chairman? – The top contenders
Before the advent of Mussolini’s spiritual brother as the head of the PCB, it was known as the Pakistan Cricket Board. It was responsible for taking care of the sport in Pakistan - the land of the pure. It is ironical how un-pure something’s can get in this land of the pure. Yes, we are talking about the recent plague that has hit the PCB in the form of a man who takes great pleasure in his intelligence. Following the plague, he proposed another name for PCB - Butt’s school for the gifted.
It is noted with great sorrow that the government of Pakistan is seeking a replacement for the chairman of the formerly known Butt’s school for the gifted. The pre-requisite for being able to apply for the esteemed position is quite comprehensive in nature. It follows that the successful applicant must have 40 years experience of playing international cricket. He must be an expert in all known bowling styles to the human race, which includes, leg spin, off spin, googly, doosra, fast bowling, medium paced bowling and underarm bowling.
He must be both an experienced right and left hand batsman. Preference will be given to candidates who have right and left foot batting experience as well. He must be able to play Russian roulette with a fully loaded gun and win. He must be a 3rd level black belt and make reporters disappear with the snap of his fingers. If his name is Ijaz Butt, he will automatically be inducted as the chairman and does not need to fulfil any other criteria. If his name is Imran Khan he will automatically be disqualified.
Legend has it that in Greek mythology a guy named Ijaz Butt once challenged the Gods, and sent tremors down the very pillars that held Greek society. They sent him on a paid vacation to Pakistan for they feared their annihilation.
The same man was appointed as Chairman PCB after he was teleported to Pakistan in a time machine. During his cricketing career, Ijaz Butt holds the record for bowling a cricketing ball faster than the speed of lightening and hitting it for a six to send it into orbit. Some say the ball is still in orbit. Such are the merits of the great chairman to whom the entire nation called Pakistan is indebted to for the improvement of cricket in the region – may be even the world. However, in light of the government’s decision to replace the chairman, the world must look at other mighty contenders for the job.
The man who tops the list of the mighty contenders is a man commonly known in Pakistan as Arif Lohar a.k.a. A-lo. His specialty is the use of a unique contraption that he uses for mind control. With the advent of A-lo as chairman PCB, the rest of the cricketing world can keep scratching their heads as their teams are defeated into oblivion.
The man next in line for this prestigious job is the beloved Interior Minister of Pakistan, Mr Rehman Malik who is not only is responsible for handling security in Pakistan, but also an avid sports fan. He is also commonly known as the person who helped transform the “boys” of the Sri Lankan cricket team into real men after their excursion trip into the “line of fire” in Lahore.
Tauqir Zia - a military man and former PCB chairman is another candidate who would be able to follow in the footsteps of http://www.senore.com/Cricket/Ijaz-Butt-c64128. His specialty is his ability to make a war plan in hostile situations. Plus, he will be able to transform the cricket ground into a battle zone. Zia has been to war twice and is a veteran fighter. He was the first Pakistani to have used Inzamam as an anti missile shield.
Imran Khan is one man who will never become the PCB chairman - not in a thousand years. Not if his name is Imran Khan, since Imran Khan shares the name with the man who lead Pakistan to a World Cup victory against England in 1992. If he comes at the helm of affairs, he might lead http://www.senore.com/Cricket/Pakistan-c755 to another victory. That is highly unwanted.
Despite all these suggestions of a proposed change of chairman, it is imperative to note that Mr. Ijaz will be truly missed from office, by none other than Mr Ijaz.
(All the quotes and "facts" in this article are made up)
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