Who was the first person to look at a cow and say...?

Question

"I think I will squeeze those dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out" ?

Answer 1

Mr. H. E. Moo and his poor 3 ft. tall friend Al ( his last and middle names have been lost to antiquity)

Perhaps Mr. Moo had a "thing" for cows... maybe he was possessed... maybe Al was bored... any number of reasons of course but there is no doubt that Al and Moo where the first 2 people ever to drink what we now call the great american milk

(Of course there are also theories that Milk Man Junior was the first but it's kinda an odd story... you see... Milk Man Jr. was 18, a typical teen. Milk Man Sr. was in his late 40's. now Jr. got really mad at Sr. one day and ran off into the pastures miles away from there house and all he had around him were cows... he saw a calf drinking it's mother's milk one day and thought "gee i iz so thirsty" - this was before english classes- " me thinks I will drinks!" and there you have it.. theory #2)  

Answer 2

Maybe thats not how it happend. Maybe someone, after seeing a mother breast feed, said hey I can get the same stuff from a cow, it looks like, lets do it!

Haha. That explanation got dumber and dumber as I typed it, because why would you WANT to drink stuff from a cow if you never have before?!