Question:

Who will read my 3 AM pome about Alchemy?

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Alchemy

by Elaine Polin

I have a tale that must be told

of alchemy and lead to gold;

stay and read as it unfolds,

It’s a story about you.

Once upon a leaden year,

a poet stumbled and fell near

a golden web, entangled here

With a story about you.

The web was spun with verbal thread,

on poetry its Spider fed,

soon she found her poems read

In a story about you.

Then Captain Spider came and took

his captive poet to a book,

asked if she would like to look

At a story about you.

He sang such sweet, hypnotic songs,

laughed until she found it wrong

to say she would not go along

With a story about you.

She read your poems about life,

hopes, plans, dreams, war, daily strife,

your words oft cutting like a knife

In a story about you.

You sang of time and space and Mars,

traveled with her to the stars,

laughed, cried, prayed with no holds barred,

In a story about you.

She learned our sorrows have an end,

that love and hope may live again,

that she could have real, virtual friends,

This story is for you!

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21 ANSWERS


  1. im confused of who wrote what vs who is reading the poetry

    and this Captain Spider guy?..

    http://www.omgwhatever.com/farmer/captai...

    doesnt matter, it was fun science!

    again? your 3 am madness. lol


  2. I don't know about any of the other newcomers, but this touched my heart personally. Thank you.

    And who will read my yesterday's FAIR pome?

  3. Alice told you which mushrooms not to eat...

  4. It was poetry and it was certainly good... but that is not why I really thought it was awesome. It was awesome because you gathered up emotions of deep feelings, managed to put it all into thought, then find the perfect way to say "thank you for being my friends and being here"... you are a good poet and you have a burning passion to write... and much much more.

    Sometimes I'm witty, flirty, teasing, and even critical... now I'm none of those; I'm being nothing more than honest.

    ... one more thing... you need to smile more, it looks good on you. (smile)

    note: I've only been in here a month and I'm starting to get feelings of bonding... it's nice.

  5. A lovely, light-hearted romp...you have found a wonderful use for all the hours of the day! Thanks for sharing.

  6. Enticing Web of Gold,

    will forever hold

    your Traveler's Tales

    not just to Mars,

    but to the stars!


  7. it's fantastic but, the last two stanza is not A,A,A,B just like the rest of the stanzas. it would be excellent if it is 8,8,8,7 perfectly.

  8. It's great ~

    I wouldn't change a thing.

  9. I have much gold to sell.  

    Converting lead does really work.

    No fires needed for this

    some paint, a brush and a touch

    P.S. since you paint so well

    how about helping with the lead

    maybe 50/50?


  10. I enjoyed your poem very much,it must have yaken you a while. I really did like it.

  11. Who knows when their inspiration will wake up, or will need a rest, for that matter.

  12. That's an awesome poem Elaine. I liked it all the way through.

    One line suggestion though:

    hopes, plans, dreams, war, daily strife,

    That ones rhythm feels a little off to me. Maybe something like:

    your hopes, your dreams, your daily strife,

    Just thinking out loud. For a light hearted narrative it was very compelling.

  13. Very clever.*****

  14. Very clever, and entertaining - it does sound a bit like a medieval ballad - especially the alchemy and the spider part.

    The repetition of the last line is what gives this poem that extra oomph.

    I was on A!Y this am from 1.30 ish to 4.00 ish - first time in my life, it seemed very weird to be up at that time - I wasn't as creative as you though, I just did some answering.


  15. As I was reading these words, the ringing music was a joy to my ears, and although at least one line got a bit long, I wouldn't have you change a thing.  It seemed you were singing to me personally, and I'm sure it felt that way to every reader.  This, my dear Elaine, is what poetry is all about, creating emotional response from the reader or listener.  I am going to save this one in my shoebox of special poems.

  16. Seems to me that you need no Alchemy course as you clearly have the Midas touch.

    how about paying me a visit?

    http://uk.answers.yahoo.com/question/ind...

  17. It's 3 AM and I'm reading it now.  Delightful poem with a wonderful message.  All too often we forget that our contacts are people and we like them, we learn to love them, and if they go away, it hurts.

    Just wonderful!

    T.

  18. Me!!!

    From my reading it sounds like you're talking bout the Tangled Web? No?

  19. I sure wish i had your brains.

  20. it is veryyyyy intresting and cool

    his poems traveled to the stars and don't worry the stars liked the poem very much  

  21. Poem? Pome? AAAB? 8887?

    Trigee? Con-Verb?  Of Tangled

    Web I know, but Mars?

    New venturer to this site, but

    now I'm scared and frown, alas,

    my random words thrown down.

    Methinks I ventured by mistake!

    ma

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