Who will walk me down the isle father or stepfather?

Question

Ok I love my step dad very much because he raised me and my father because he is my father of course. I don't want to hurt anyone feelings since I am the first daughter to get married on both sides. Do I exclude one, and let the one that has the most involvement in my life take full participation or how would I go about having them both give me away? Or just any ideas that are appropriate in this case this includes ceremony,reception, father and daughter dance, toasts. Super sensitive please help?????

Answer 1

There is no reason why both of them can't walk you down the aisle. You love both of them, and they have both played a huge role in your life! Have two father - daughter dances...one for your father and one for your stepfather. Congrats!

Answer 2

I am going through the same thing... my mom and step dad have been married for 27 year so he raised me (I am 31) and i had to decide who was walking me... having both do it wasn't an option but maybe it is for you...

i am having my step dad walk me down the aisle, and my "real" father do a reading during the ceremony.

As for the father daughter dance... i am not having an official one where everyone stops and watches... I had both of them pick a song and gave them to our DJ... the DJ is going to announce them as a special request from them to me and ask others to join us on the dance floor...

I hope that helps... i had a friend have both her dad and step dad walk her down the aisle it worked out well. or you can have them trade off halfway down the aisle...

Answer 3

have them both walk you down the aisle. two father daugther dances and what not

Answer 4

You have plenty of options.

1. Walk with both dad and stepdad, one on each side.

2. One man can walk with you halfway down the aisle, the other can take over and escort you the rest of the way.

3. Walk by yourself. Being "given" in marriage is an antiquated idea, dating back to the days when women were actually considered to be property. You are no one's property. Walk by yourself. Have officiant skip the "giving away" portion of the ceremony.

4. Walk with your groom.

5. Walk with your mom.

And at the reception? Dance with both dads, one after the other.

The traditional way to handle it?  Mom and stepdad sit on first row. Dad escorts you down the aisle. All three parents can stand to "give you away." Then dad returns to his seat, in the THIRD row. The second row can remain empty, or you can fill it with other friends or family members.

At the reception, you and groom will have a sweetheart table for just the two of you. Dad will have his own table, where he is surrounded by his family and friends. Mom and stepdad will have a table and be surrounded by their family and friends. By acting as host and hostess at their own tables, mom and dad are kept busy . . . not interacting with each other.

IF there is animosity between mom and dad?  Warn your photographer that mom and dad do not want to be photographed together.

Hope this helps!

Answer 5

I would let them both walk you down the isle because you love them both and they all love you,,,,,so have one of them on one side and the other on the other side that way you really hapy and no one gets there feelings hurt, and you can also have a song to dance with each other them one song for you and your step dad and one for you real dad,,,,,,,,if you want have each of them do a toast, and about the giving away part,,,have that one that you have either lived with most of your life give you away or,,,,,,,,,most time that would be your real father and your mom give you away,,,,,or have them all give you away you away,,,,,in the end its up to you to choose,,,,,,,,what works best for you,,,,its your special day and i wish you all the best wishes in luck in what ever you choose just remember they all love you and thats all that matter and they know its your speical day,,,,,so just breath and everything will work out in the end you will see..

B2B-2011

best wishes

tabby

well i hope this helps

tabby

Answer 6

I say let them both as well.

Have a good day

Answer 7

you could have your father walk you down the aisle, but then do the father daughter dance with stepfather.  

Answer 8

Have one on each side. Let them both give you away. And have two father/daughter dances. Pick out two different song then are meaningful for each one. I am in your shoes too. I am getting married next fall but I think I am going just with my father. I lived with my mom and stepdad all my life and went to my dads everyother weekend so my stepdad was there more, but we never really seen eye to eye. I'm also the first out nine to get married!! If you need ANY other help email [e-mail] I love weedings and love giving ideas. Hope I helped!!

Answer 9

In this case you need to do what makes you happy. Its your day and you have to remember that. But after saying that, I know how hard it is. My mother walked me down the aisle, but not wanting to exclude my father I had him read a verse at the ceremony.

You could have of them walk you down the aisle and the other do something else, for example saying the 'I do' part to giving you away, reading a verse, witnessing the marriage certificate etc.

Good luck, but please remember its your day so enjoy it, and do what you feel would make you happy. :D

Answer 10

For my walk down the isle I picked my brother. Odd yes? But it solved my problem. I loved my father and step father but I didnt want to choose one over the other. So I picked my brother cause he was always there for me. You could also go the route that a friend of mine did. She walked down the isle by herself. Her dad and step dad walked in with their partners.

Answer 11

If they get along you could have both of them escort you down the aisle.  If they don't you should avoid it completely and walk alone.

I would also skip the father / daughter dance unless it's going to be the flying dutchmen!

I know it's a super sensitive issue, but you must remember... it is YOUR day, and you can't change the position you are in as a daughter and step daughter.

You could always have your Mom walk you down the aisle :)

Answer 12

BOTH! who says only one father gets to walk down the aisle? This is normal! My ex's wife got walked down by BOTH her father and step father!

Answer 13

Have them both walk you down the aisle.  Explain to them that you love them both and you just can't pick one over the other.  I had both of my parents walk me down the aisle.  For the reception your dad should walk in with his wife if he is married and your step dad should walk in with your mom.  You should do special dances with your father and step father at the reception.  If they both want to give toasts then let them do so.  It is so beautiful that you have such a wonderful relationship with your step father.

Answer 14

You could have both do it. But from your question it sounds like your biological father hasn't been there much for you. Your stepfather raised you and was there for you? Then that should be who does it. The sperm donor doesn't get this privilege automatically. Not unless you have a relationship with him or care about him for other reasons than "he is my (biological) father."

Answer 15

Well, I have the same situation that you have, I'm getting married next weekend, and I was actually going to have them both walk me down the aisle.  The only reason I'm not is because our church has 2 aisles and so they are a little smaller than most, so only 2 people can fit down the aisle. So instead, my step-dad is meeting us up front to give me away, but if the aisle were to be bigger, they both would've been walking me down.  As for the reception, I think just my dad is giving a toast, he is my dad, and the one who had a part in making me :) so that's his thing that he gets to do by himself is the toast.  The dances, I am doing my father/daughter dance, then my fiance is doing his mother/son dance and then I'm doing my final dance with my step-dad, hopefully this helps!  

Answer 16

Nothing else to comment on except that I totally agree with Riley!