Who would like to read my letter and help edit my English grammar?

Question

Pls Pls Pls help, I really need to win this. Pls give me any comment.

Is this a good letter or is it rude? Thanks :o

To Whom It May Concern:

I am writing to you regarding the subject (x*x x*x x*x x*x x*x) I have been told I have to repeat. I disagree with the decision that the Examination committee has been made. Because I strongly believe that I took this subject seriously and have put a certain effort in it. I had a good record of attendance, I participated in every class activities and I handed in all of my assignments.

Firstly, all of the assignments in this subject set to be group work. x*x x*x is the only person in my group. At first we both did pretty well but about few weeks after the semester started, she kept missing out classes, I hardly see her in the college and I could not contact her at all. Therefore the first part of the project (Proposal) ended up in a rush and the work has finished badly. For the other project (Crosstrack), I knew I could not rely on her anymore and she was disappeared again so I decided not to contact her and did everything all the way alone and I finally manage to finish my project. In my opinion, this was a group assignment, most groups have three people or at least two people and I had to do it by myself, I think this is already unfair to a student.

Secondly, I became very ill during week 16 in semester one and I rarely come to class during that week. There had about 3 assignments due on Friday, 13th June. ‘Wine Label’ for x*x x*x, a ‘Written Report’ for x*x x*x and a ‘Crosstrack’ design for x*x x*x. For the wine label, I finished early so I dropped it into XXX’s Drop Box in the server around Wednesday, 11th June. For x*x and x*x assignments, I was unable to come to the college on the due date. So I came to the college on Monday, 16th June, I printed both of my assignments in color in the Resource Centre and after that I gave my assignments to x*x in the administration and signed two late work forms accompanied with the copy of my medical certificate. Unfortunately, the Crosstrack assignment is ridiculously missing.

Thirdly, I feel unfair of I was the one who have completed all the work but I have received a fail and x*x who did not come to class and did not complete anything and she receives a pass in this subject.

As a former law student, I have always believed that the world has justice and everyone should deserve what they deserved. I believe that I should deserve more than a pass in this subject, if I have to repeat this subject then I think I need to repeat all of my subjects. Because I had the same attitude in all of my subjects that I have done in semester one and I handed in all of my assignments for each subjects.

I am very disappointed with the college’s Late Work Submission system, how can they lose a student’s work, I think this is ridiculously wrong and it is the administration responsibility. This is a valuable lesson to me, now I understand how important it is to hand in my assignment directly to my lecturer and nobody accept myself could be trusted.

I hope that you could consider my appeal.

Thank you for your consideration.

Best regards,

x*x x*x

Student number: XXXXXX

Answer 1

I would had I not just finished all my english homework. Sorry.

Answer 2

I will try but you know if you have WORD in your computer- and typthe letter in it- it will correct, punctuation, grammar and spelling.

This letter is in reference to subject x*x which I have been informed I must repeat due to the decision of the Examination Committee. I disagree with their decision due to the fact that I completed all my assignments, participated in all class activities, have a good attendance record and seriously put my best effort into this class.

Firstly, all of the assignments in this subject was supposed to be group work and only xxxx was in my group.  x*x participated in the assignments with me for the first few weeks but after that x*x didn't show and since I had no way of contacting her, I had to finish the first part of the proposal by myself and due to the delay of waiting for her and having to due the project by myself, it was rushed and not my best work.  For the Crosstrack project I realized early on that I cannot rely on her and did not waste my time thinking she was going to help in anyway.  I completed the supposed "group project" by myself where other students had at least two people and some had three to do the assignment.

Secondly, --in here state exactly what your illness was and if you saw the doctor-- and should finish with I barely made it to class that week.

next should be-- there were three assignments due that week  the rest is okay...where you state you were unable to come to the college---GIVE THE REASON- or make up a good one....

Next paragraph should be the as a former law student ......finishing that paragraph with where is the justice in x*x getting a passing grade for a course she neither attended nor did the work whereas I not only attended while I was ill, I completed all projects on my own which were truly designated as group projects.  

The rest is perfect......sorry this happened to you but I have to tell you, you're not alone...my daughter had a speech com class in which all of the students lived at least 30-45 minutes from the campus and had the same thing...group projects, which no one else showed up but her....and though she got a Bs in nursing, that class grade kept her off honors......fight for your rights......