Why, when my wife is driving and I give her hints and tips on how to be a better driver, does she get cross?

Question

I mean, I'm only trying to help!

Answer 1

That would be because she made an objective comparison of your respective driving records and concluded that you had no worthy advice to contribute.

Answer 2

Just make sure YOUR side has an airbag also.

When she gets ticked at you and is driving 80 MPH and headed for a wall that is NOT the time to find out only the driver has an airbag

Answer 3

You Buffoon.

You can not be for real.

If your intention was to antagonise then it has worked.

Women are better drivers than men, that is why they pay less for insurance.

Go and learn how to wash the dishes, comfort a screaming baby and cook dinner , ALL AT THE SAME TIME, and I'm sure that your wife will be happy to take your advice, until then I sujest that you button it.

Answer 4

Behave you.  You dare tell me how to drive and i would kick  you.

Answer 5

You would be too if the positions were reversed - you would then call her a back seat driver and get cross!

Answer 6

Hi I will say this to anyone weather they are a women or a man, that as long as the person has past there test then they can drive how they like, if the driving instructor has passed them and they havent made any comments on how they should drive then they shouldnt be told by another driver how to drive.

I dont even drive, but going from my hubby's expericance with my dad as well as my brother with my dad it gets really annoying, my dad past his test over 30 years ago, and althought he is older and wiser he just didnt really know what todays test and things are.

He used to sit in with my brother when he was learning to drive and they used to always end up driving as my dad would just pass on tips that he thought would help when they were clearly wrong. He did the same with my hubby and the week before he was to go in for his test he was telling my hubby that he was going to right him a list of everything he is doing wrong and every bad habit he has picked up, my hubby couldnt believe what he was hearing. And to top it all off my hubby past so whatever my dad said he was doing right or what he had to do in the test and telling him all these habits hes got that he wouldnt pass with was a load of rubbish.

So like I say people who have past there test know how to drive and dont need anyone too tell them how to drive to make them a better driver, at the end of the day its the people who tell other people how to drive they are the ones that are the bad drivers in the end as they clearly know nothing.

Even if you are trying to help, you wife knows what she is doing she can drive and thats all that matters.  

Answer 7

Drivers don't care for 'backseat' drivers. It's annoying to be told how to do something, when one is obviously capable of doing it their way. If she is legally licensed to drive and has a good driving record, then she must be doing all right without your help. If not, well, then maybe you should be doing the driving.

Answer 8

Backseat drivers should be thrown out of the car. And  if you cannot understand  your claim of Help is only a hindrance,  you may well be without her company very soon.  

Answer 9

Don't go there Mate, it's not worth it, women don't take kindly to any sort of criticism, however well meant!

Answer 10

oooopsies looks like you hit a few nerves with that question!!

My partner is exactly the same - I taught her to drive over a year ago and (god knows where from) she has developed a numerous bad habits.

Now, I'm a driving instructor, so I am probably the worst person to have next to you when driving, but her driving is pretty good so I don't mind.

However - as I am the one who pays for the bills (not complaining about this - just stating a fact) I do tend to mention things like her resting her foot on the clutch (you can actually hear the clutch when she rest her foot there so you know it's not doing any good!) and I do sometimes suggest that she uses the handbrake when waiting at the lights on a hill instead of holding the car on the bite!

She's usually fine about me mentioning those, but if she's not eaten, or is in a grumpy mood she will bite "Why is it you ALWAYS find something wrong with my driving? I NEVER moan about YOUR driving!"

I did reply "Well, that's because - as a driving instructor - there's nothing to moan about!" but i regretted it for the next 4 hours that she didn't speak to me for!!

Answer 11

Does your wife give you tips also. She knows how to drive so keep your month shut.  

Answer 12

just tell her 1 or 2 time don't repeat the same . my saying is that

Answer 13

How long have you been married? You should know that you cannot tell you wife how to do anything.

Answer 14

I'm with DAVE J on this one.  I too taught my wife to drive and she has told me that I make her nervous when I sit beside her. I cannot help noticing her bad habits, no handbrake at lights/junctions.  

A few months ago, I just mentioned that she is too confident behind the wheel and that she needs to have a bump to bring her back.  Well, that did happen a few weeks ago.  Not her fault, but a bmw driver seen her cross his path and he seemed to veer to hit her, turns out his girlfriend said he was showing off to her by saying watch this!, after that slight bump she has reverted back to her driving like she did on her test, well almost.

I would suggest you go for advanced driver training and then go and spend around £3k and become a driving instructor.  Train for about a year and pass all exams ( pass rate is very very high) and THEN you can tell someone how too drive, properly.

Until then I suggest you leave the poor woman alone, or you will be ALONE.  

Answer 15

For the same reason as you would if the boot was on the other foot. my advice is wait until asked.

Frankly I think you are either very brave or extremely foolish in your behaviour

Answer 16

as she has passed her test,she feels that you are implying that you are a better driver than her

Answer 17

sir , please bite your tongue when your wife is driving. it will save you from having her cross at you for the rest of the day. we women do not like it when men try to take over our driving. just remember  , how did you feel the last time you were driving and she said.... slow down , you are going too fast .... , or speed up , we need to get there on time ...how about this one .... ahhh you are too close to the center line .... we are going to crash and die.... { that is my favorite } . remember , if you can not refrain from ..trying to help..  she will start taking another car { unless that is what you are going for }. hope this helps you.  i hope your next drive is ...nag free... and enjoyable , sir.  

Answer 18

of corse...SHE'S A WOMAN,thats what they do....now charge her for the lessons.

Answer 19

My husband can't give me coaching tips when we Golf, and I can't make comments when he drives!  

There's an issue there, with not wanting to be corrected by your spouse.  I know it goes both ways for us, but always best to bite your lip, instead of having a fight over something small and stupid.  This great book, Love and Respect by Emerson Eggerichs, talks about the "Crazy Cycle!"  How things can blow up into a huge fight over something small like tone, or men and women's different perspectives.  

Answer 20

If she doesn't ask for your advice and you give her advice anyway, she is going to feel like you are patronizing her and that is going to lead to her feeling insecure. She should be thankful for your attempts to help, but if she is going to get upset, then don't bother.

Answer 21

No you're not.  You are less of a help and more of danger.

Your wife passed her driving test to the satisfaction of the test examiner and therefore is perfectly competent at driving.

You don't say how long she has been driving but you never stop learning, every day you learn more.

The reason that you find it necessary to 'help' is because you are not comfortable with her driving.

That is what you should address, not the other way round.

Answer 22

Any driver hates to be corrected.My wife is always slamming on the non-existent brake on the passenger side and grabbing the dashboard and telling me to look out for "that guy". "That guy" is usually 2 full blocks ahead and is no concern at all.

Answer 23

Would it bother you?  I'm sure there are things people could point out about your driving.  The problem is women have this twisted thought that they can drive and hate to be corrected.  Just tell her you want to drive when you go out.