Why Can't My 10 year old and 12 year old sons wash their own hair?

Question

It's deeper than that I have to teach both boys over and over again how to get clean and take a shower and a bath. I have to tell them how to wash the hair what body parts to clean. My stepson is 12 years old and not circumcised doesn't wash his p***s right so it gets all dirty inside. My 10 year old seems to do better than that. He is circumcised. Is this a boy thing? They are both too old for me to give them bathes. Although they have disabilities it's still crazy.

What the heck am I supposed to do sit and watch them take showers and bathes. Till they are like 13 and 14?

Answer 1

If they have disabilities then it is your job to help them.If they were normal it would not be a problem.You signed up for this though.

Answer 2

dont baby them...you tell them go in the showerr get washed if they come out still dirty just send em back in again. they know ur gonna go in there and help out.even people with disabilities needs to be autonomous and have some responsibilities sometimes

Answer 3

make them take baths, so the dirt will at least soak off if they don't scrub. I'd give the short buzz cuts too, so their hair will be easier to get clean.

And yes, its a boy thing. Sometimes they just want to be smelly.

Answer 4

I think your other 'answers' are missing an important element.  They have disabilities...you should talk to their doctors.  Tell them the problems you're having and ask if it's normal or expected with their forms of disability.  If so, ask them for their recommendations.  If not, if they see no reason the boys would be having trouble then I'd start out by giving them incentives to get clean.  Give them each a 'star chart' on the fridge...once they get so many stars (one star for each successful bath/shower that they leave clean) then they get a special privilege or treat.  Then take it from there.

You should also...if helping them bathe is necessary, get your husband involved, especially with your 12 stepson!  He's getting old enough to derive pleasure from the experience of you cleaning his p***s...having their father do the cleaning will probably not be something either of them (or your husband wants) and so therefore it may help take care of the issue by on its own!

Good luck! :)

Answer 5

at least they get in the water should be good enough for the boy that needs extra care you need to tell him the reasons why or have his doctor tell him.  

Answer 6

They are being lazy. Even boys without disabilities don't like showers.

Put your foot down.

My moms neighbor girl has downsindrome. She has her period and takes care of it herself.

Answer 7

they can -you just have unrealistic expectations.  loosen up and focus on something more important.

Answer 8

NO WAY. Dont let them think you are going to keep babying them.

if they dont want to shower properly then maybe you need to just let them do it their way.

when they start to stink, maybe try things like not take them on outings and when asked why tell them that they need to grow up and if they wont keep themselves clean you are not going to hang around their stink.

it sounds mean but i think that will get through to them and even still kids at school and such will start to say things to them, and boys just want to impress their friends. maybe do the same with dinner aswell? get them to have it away from the rest of the family untill they will look after themselves right. these are things they need to learn. when you wake them up just tell them go have a shower and get ready for school etc.

and maybe remind them to wash their hair ever few days or when you feel its needed, if they still dont do it the other consequences will get the message through!!

good luck =]

and remember they are boys, they will learn, but at this age it needs to be sooner rather than later.

(the 12yro will be a "teenager" soon he needs to pick up on this and maybe you need to talk to him about what it means to become a teenager and what responsibilities come with it)

Answer 9

It's not that they can't it's that they don't want to.  

Answer 10

This is not unusual. You need to sit them down and have a conversation about why hygene is important. You see its not that they can't do these things, they just don't care. Explian to them about how hygene affects health and how other react to them. Be kind but realistic. Once they understand the motivation, they'll take care of themselves.  (Oh, and stop checking their penises!!?)