Why Do I See So Often On Here?

Question

"Well shes 18, you cant spank her", "Shes too old for a spanking", "Shes not a child, you cant spank her"

Of course you can! You are her mother and shes living under your roof.

The alternative is pay your own way to college, buy your own food, buy your own clothes, get your own place to live etc!

Answer 1

At 18 they are legal adults.  Break the dinner plate.  

Tell a disrespectful adult living in your house they have 48 hours to find a place more congenial to their lifestyles and after that you are evicting them and changing the locks.  

That will get their attention.   Kids _expect_ parents to put up with c**p in the name of "unconditional love"  which does NOT mean unconditional acceptance of bad behavior.  

Kids bully parents now days.  "YOU have to put up with me because I didn't ask to be here."   I have actually heard a 20 year old say that out loud to his  Mother.  

It is bullying pure and simple.   A parent's job is to prepare their children to survive outside the family home, not support them indefinitely.  

Answer 2

Spanking an 18 year old is illegal. It would be just like going out and assaulting a person your age, because at 18 years old, they are an adult. Plus, spanking an 18 year old wouldn't do too much good. They shouldn't be treated like a small child. If you're still having to spank an 18 year old because he/she's still defiant, then you went wrong a LOOOONG time ago!

Answer 3

Spanking at 18? Parents just don't spank 18 year olds. It's kinda wrong...

Answer 4

Your right :)

If he /she doesn't want to face what ever consequences mom/dad want to dish out, they should leave!

Answer 5

Why on earth would you hit a 18 year old?

The can strike back at you, ever hear about kids murdering their parents?!

What are they doing so wrong for the kid to be corrupted?

My opoinion - hitting/spanking is one of them.

Reason with the adult -

have a heart to talk - for the love of god dont hit....

Answer 6

agreed

Answer 7

Spanking an 18 year old is really ridiculous and strange quite frankly.  Is that as far as your parental teaching methods go??  Over 18 years you can't figure out other ways to teach your child the ways of life other than spanking them?  Then you're not very smart and you're child certainly isn't learning very much from you.  So if they're having difficulty with something in life, what are they going to do to handle it?  Spank their teacher? Spank their boss? Spank their friends? Do you see where I'm going with this??

Answer 8

spanking your 18 year old daughter is obsurd are you kidding me that sounds kinda perverted even. I think she would be better off on her own then get spanked (how humiliating is that?)

Answer 9

Its because at that age

they'll hit back

God knows I would.

Answer 10

you are right, she needs to follow there rules, or get out.

Answer 11

i agree but now a days alot of people don't agree with spanking a child for some reason. I think thats whats wrong with alot of kids these days if the parents would just spank & set boundaries. My 14 yr old sister needs one! if i would have done what she has already done at her age i would have got it hands down.

Answer 12

At 18 your child is no longer a baby but more of an adult. If your 18 year old does something wrong that makes you want to "spank" them, there is seriously something wrong. You should be able to have a conversation with someone that age, not want to hit them. Besides, they are old enough to make their own decisions, but if they are not happy with their parents rules, then yes I would make them move out before I would spank them.

Answer 13

well spanking your 18 yr old seems a little much i mean it wouldnt be easy to put her over your knee..... so the alternative would be to either knock the sh** out of her which isnt the best idea or make her start paying her own way

Answer 14

At 18, you should be able to reason with them.  They should be able to understand, unlike a toddler.

Plus, at 18, they can hit back!

Answer 15

If you parented right from the start you wouldn't have to spank an 18 year old!

Answer 16

spanking an 18 year old is a little , wow.

Try taking privilages away , Besides , Taking stuff away teaches them better then a spanking.

Because with a spanking the pain lasts a few minutes or so and then after that they'll just do it again cause its such a short term punishment. Taking things they can do/or thier things away is more long term and will make them think twice next time.

and by 18 they should be moved out and in college anyways. Either that or paying rent and for thier own things.

Answer 17

Actually legally you can't spank them.  Since both parent and child are over 18 it is considered assult.  I think the better alternative to spanking your 18 yo, which is rediculous anyway, make them pay their own way, find their own palce to live.  If they can't follow the rules then that is what needs to happen.

Answer 18

Honestly I dont know. The way I see it is you are never too old, it's your parents they brought you into this world you have to respect them. h**l, my boyfriend is 19 years old 6'5 and 300 pounds and if his mom told him he was about to be spanked you bet your *** he would!!

Answer 19

At 18 its not child abuse anymore lol you could woop their ***, kick them out of your house ect and nothing will happen at 18 its a funny age your an adult but still a child( its weird) you cant drink till your 21 but at 18 your an adult lol(in canada you can drink ay 19 and alberta its 18) life is messed up but at 18 you should have a job or be in collage, if you dont want to live with rules move out get a job ect, i moved out of my moms house at 16, and at 18 i owned a house, now at 21 i own a house on the beach worth over 1million, i have 3 kids, im married, i dont have to work because i worked my *** off and got everything on my own without help from any man or my family, i own everything my husband just uses it all LOL independant woman i am and i plan on raising my 3 daughters that way too.

Answer 20

As I see it- an 18 year old is an adult, and therefore should be mature enough to not engage in  behaviour  warranting parental punishment.  In Australia, an 18 year old has all the legal rights of an adult, yet so often they do not have the maturity to handle themselves.  However, I do agree that 18 is too old for a spanking.  Could you not speak to her as an adult?  If this doesn't work...  Explain firmly that now they are 18, you have no legal responsibility to provide for them, nor put up with their BS.  Either they get their act together and start acting like a grown-up, or they can move out.

Answer 21

If they'd been brought up properly, there would be no need for spanking them in the first place.  Hitting is never the answer, not at any age.  But yes, if they're not happy at home then the alternative is for them to get a place of their own.

Answer 22

Spanking 18 year olds is pretty weird.  At that age you should be able to talk in a civilized manner.

Answer 23

As a parent I feel if your big enough to talk back and disrespect me than your big enough for a good ol *** whoopen.

Answer 24

Because parents generally don't act like parents anymore.  

Answer 25

Because literally its against the law for you spank your child that is over 18. Its called Assault. You can be arrested - even put in jail for that.

Just because she lives in your house doesn't take away her basic rights as a human being.

Answer 26

Ah yes, the frustrations of a parent are immense! Spanking her or throwing her out might seem logical when you’re angry, but the damage done to your relationship will be irreparable. Remember, adolescence is the age of rebellion (surely you’ve been through it as well)!  On the threshold of adulthood the child forms an individual identity different from the parent – hence the friction.

From what you say, you are making great efforts to meet all her physiological and security needs – food, clothes, home and education. That’s certainly commendable! But there is one aspect that you (both) may be missing out on – a close, emotional bonding. You may love one another very much, but you’re being unable to communicate your thoughts and feelings in a rational way, so there is no joy in being together.

For your own wellbeing, consider changing your approach. Concentrate on keeping calm and stop your fears/emotions from overwhelming you.  You set the example if you try to understand her viewpoint, and also communicate your own in a more gentle way. Remember also that your children seldom do as you say - they do as you do.

Answer 27

you are ridiculous.  and 18 year old is an adult, so spanking an 18 year old is spanking an adult, whether its your kid or not.  if anyone tried to SPANK me because i didnt follow the rules, i would call the police and press charges for assault.  thats what it is, assault.  if a parent actually felt the need to spank there ADULT child, then they probably are not very intelligent.  you should be able to TALK to an 18 year old.