Why Have A Child You Cant Raise!!!!!????????

Question

For example your parents cant afford raising you up to be successful and to get a job any job where ever and not caring where that child goes in life, or what goals she/he has

the way i see it, if the parents don't care then how can that child have any respect for her parents? I don't mean that in a bad way but its true.... They cant even graduate they own child... they can't afford for them to even marry the love of there childs life? what kind of parents do that?

why have a child in the first place and allow it to suffer? why do they blame the children and not them?

please help

Answer 1

People love s*x and s*x results in kids and because you have a child doesnt mean ur a parent. Its sad but true!

Answer 2

My dad and mom were 15-16 when i was born. Life was and still is very difficult for me. I understand when you say how can the child have any respect for the parents. I love my mom but i dont see her as a mother, only a friend. I dont respect her as a mother only because she was never around and she still isnt. Shes young and she still wants to go out until four in the morning to drink and go to clubs. I have been living with my grandma for 5-6 years and my mom lives 15 mins away from us. I don't know why she doesnt get her life together and take care of me. I want to spend time with her and actually live with her. My parents said that my mom was in the abortion office with me but they said they couldnt do it. I dont know the reason why.

Answer 3

whhaat i was about to totally agree with you but I dont feel its completely the parents responsibility to pay for your wedding and graduation! what decade are you from?

right- your alive, your healthy, your educated therefore THEY DID A GOOD JOB

this is your life theyve raised you perfectly, its your fault your whining for ridiculous reasons.

think about the kids, who have been raised basically in squats, who get beaten up, with hardly any food-- do they complain? no !!!! they have a c**p life but they live it and get the best out of life!

and then theres people like you who dont realise how lucky you are its painful to see you complaining about such ridiculous things!!

Answer 4

I think the true question here is: Why have MORE children than you can afford to raise?  

People who have multiple children and don't work because they can't afford to take care of them, then live off the government, those people are pathetic.  Go to the clinic and get some free rubbers people!

Answer 5

I guess because humans are basically animals and will fornicate, many think by having a baby it will make the man stay but it usually backfires

Answer 6

i ask my cousin that question all the time

Answer 7

good question

i might say they are the most stupidest parents in the world

because most of two couples like to have pleasures of life(e.g. s*x)but they don't think of the consequences after having s*x, which is having big resposibilities of taking care on such child or loosing virginity or something else worst.

Answer 8

I agree slightly that people should not have kids unless they can support them but what you say is pretty harsh.

It is not just down to the parents to ensure that the child is successful and can get any job anywhere - it is also down to the child. By the time we are old enough to work, we are old enough to make our own decisions.  All our parents can do is try to help is choose the right path in life but once we become adults, we are responsible for our own jobs and our own lives.

As for not having children if you can't afford to pay for their wedding - I honestly think that is the most rediculous thing I have ever heard. Pay for your own wedding, if you can't afford it - don't get married. Find your own job and pay for your own wedding.

There is far more to being a parent than buying things for your child. LOVE is the best thing any parent can give a child.

Whichever child you are talking about sounds to me like they are spoilt and don't appreciate the good things in life like love, respect, honesty etc.

I am not answering for best answer here I am answering because your question really struck a nerve with me.

Answer 9

Well, I think your perception is a little skewed, although I do agree that too many people have kids that aren't qualified for the job.  We have to have a liscense to drive, but not to have a kid.

HOEWEVER, the things you list as "needs" are not "needs".  Food, Shelter, Clothing.  Those are needs.  Is the child fed?  Is the child warm and dry?  Does the child have a clean place to live?  Proper medical care? Those are NEEDS for a child.

Being able to pay for a wedding or to go to college are actually optional things.  Many people in the world don't even have access to dental care or the proper nutrition, so if you look at it that way, is a wedding really all that important?

I just came back from a trip abroad and it's amazing how your definition of "need" and "want" changes when you see how well we live here in America.

I don't believe that failing to pay for a marriage is "suffering".  If the child was starving to death or out in the cold, that would be suffering.  Not having the newest sneakers or the coolest electronics game, that's not "suffering" - that's teaching the kid that sometimes life sucks and you have to work for what you get in life.  Which, by the way, is something a lot more kids need to learn!

Answer 10

B/c they have a "I'm a victim" attitude. Everyone is out to get me. I know someone like this. I have wonderred this but have had enough. It's stupid. These people seem to be lazy and just don't care. They are very selfish. They are willfully ignorant because they are blinded by the whole victim thing.

It's best just to avoid them. They are poison.

edit: What's worst is when the kids they raise become burdens on society in a way because of criminal behavior. The parents either just feel bad or accept no responsibility at all. They were too strict and were too busy being victims. It can make you angry. Have you tried to have a conversation with this kind of person? I think that's why I'm so worked up. I have to censor myself and I'm not used to doing that to this extent.

Of course not all poor parents are like this. Thank God! My parents both grew up in poorer families. They have done well. My father's brothers and sister all went onto college and graduate school. My grandparents believed strongly in education and made sure that all of the kids went onto college. My grandfather owned businesses and worked very hard. No excuses from him. No victimhood. My mom's parents worked hard too but college was optional. They didn't have that same kind of attitude but it was the generation. Women just went to college to find a husband. College wasn't a necessity at that time.

But these other people just are clueless. They preach the same old things and hide behind their religion. One seems to feel bad but that does nothing.

One blames his kids. He did nothing wrong. Willfully ignorant and really lazy. They are poor and he retired as soon as he could. My dad could retire but is still working. My mom works too. They complain about how poor they are. Here's a clue, get a part-time job. I've worked with retirees that just got a job to get out of the house. If you are poor and choose to wallow in self pity then don't come crying to me because I don't want to hear it. Do something or be quiet.

edit: The family I'm speaking of couldn't afford the basic necessities for their kids. That's the problem. They didn't make a real effort. They are too busy playing the victim card instead of making an effort. Just do the bare minimum.

Answer 11

I was a young teen, experimenting with s*x and having a time of my life. At age 15, 16 or older, child rearing was the far this thing from my mind.

Our beautiful daughter was the joy of our life, until she started to become our responsibility not our families.

Answer 12

exactly no1 should have a child without being married, both or one with a steady career or being secure and have the recourses to be able to raise a child properly.

Baby bonus is the reason i think poor people have a kid and the goverment pays them money to spend it on grog and neglect thier child.

Answer 13

not all of them are like that. it cant be helped to have people like that. but the fact that they let the child live is still important. the child still has a chance to change his/her life. if they got him/her aborted then he/she won't even have a chance to make choices in life.

Answer 14

Hate to say it but my parents did not put any money into my wedding- so that makes them bad parents? My father being a quality engineer and my mother being an RN- but they are awful parents??? Okay... opinions are one thing but at least make sure your hands are clean before you bring that equation into this..... My father was in the military for 26 years and i got hand me downs and went to the goodwill for clothes- because i did not get brand new clothes AND name brand c**p makes them bad parents??? i think not. There is more to life then getting things you want... more importantly they try to instill morals and respect in their children to prepare them for the real world. get off your high horse!

Answer 15

Unfortunately there is no training required for being a parent, which is weird because it's the hardest jobin the world!  So it's not everyone's expertise...

btw, I paid for half of my education and some of my wedding and I am proud of it.

Answer 16

my parents couldn't afford me, but that by no means made them bad parents.  money doesn't have anything to do with it and poo on anybody who tells you otherwise.  My husband and I paid for our wedding, we paid for our college educations (still paying for them lol), due to pay for our twins hospital bills until they turn 25 and so on and so forth.  Children learn from those things, but they don't resent the parents.

Answer 17

Wow. You are being a major drama queen. Who's to say what a family can afford and what a family cannot?? Knowledge is a gift that you work hard for, not a commodity in a name-brand store with a pretty price tag. When there's a will, there's a way. Do you think every dirt-poor family has never had a child go to school? My grandfather's family couldn't afford to buy him 2 pairs of pants, but he went to college because he worked hard for it and saved everything he had to pay for it. Just because you don't go to college doesn't mean you won't get a good job either. My father was a freshman drop-out and he now owns his own business, making over $100,000 a year. Being poor doesn't mean not caring,... on the contrary,... it means you care more. You scrimp and save more than any other person to get your child into college and to accomplish their goals, because it doesn't come easy to someone that has to fight for what they want. Now, marriage is alot cheaper than what you think it is. If the couple truly cannot afford to marry their child off in a church with bride's maids and flowers and a reception afterwards, they can always have a tiny little ceremony at their home with their pastor. That doesn't cost hardly anything and it's still a very special occasion. Life doesn't have to cost an arm and a leg,... people just assume that's what the American life is,... having EVERYTHING you want when you want it. Poverty builds humility and, in my opinion, better people, because they know not to take what they have for granted and they know what hard work truly is. It's not suffering,... it's life.

Answer 18

money has nothing to do with success. kids raised in poor families can thrive on love and support. kids who dont grow up with playstations, wii's, xboxes and all that other c**p have a better chance at school.

the parents being poor has nothing to do with the fact that the child graduates or not, or gets married.

me and my boyfriend both came from poor familes, ghetto poor, and we both graduated, with honors, and are going to pay for our own wedding. we have good jobs and a great life.

maybe our parents could never help us out financially, but instead of living off of them, we learned from their mistakes.

if kids who grow up poor drop out and end up on the streets, or in jail, its their own fault, everyone has the ability to stay in school and succeed if they want to.