Why am I so attracted to marrried men... advice please!?

Question

Ok I am a 21 year old female and I am mainly attracted to married men. I have had an affair with one before and I realize that was a bad thing to do. I am attracted to men in their older 20's to mid 30's and I feel like if a guy is single, there must be a reason why he is single... maybe because no girl wants him? I dont know.. its kinda weird but I dont want to think like this anymore and I need some advice. I feel like older men are better in all departments and can do better than a guy my age would. I just find married men so s**y. Any advice?

Answer 1

Easy! You're afraid of commitment. You see the married men as no strings attached. If he's in his late 20's to early 30's he's more than likely a professional (settled in a career), He's more experienced at love making, and he probably doesn't have the money woe's that most guys your age do. I can only say this because I've seen women like you time and time again. You think you're being smart by picking the guy that can give you everything you want less the serious commitment, and then you later get "caught up" with this guy because you catch feelings for him, or you have a kid with him.

My advice to you (as a woman in a serious relationship with a man) would be to stop while you're ahead. Before your life of fun comes to a halt with child support and custody cases, and a psycho wife driving cross country with adult dippers on looking for you. Leave the married men a lone and find a guy your age that's not attached. Learn from the experiences you have with him so that when you do find that special someone you appreciate him more. A part of being young is experiencing the heart aches that help us grow into women and men. Learn from those bad relationships so that you and the man you chose to say "I do" too can make good on the union you celebrate in. Remember, what goes around comes around, what you give you will receive (10 fold).

Answer 2

nope, no advice, but have fun.

Answer 3

Because you're a dirty w***e.

Answer 4

Why do you find maried men so s**y?...im sure their are plenty of s**y single men out there..one reason you should stop being attracted to married men is bc you one day may want to get married...and im sure you don't want some young chick trying to get with your husband...

but you are young so it may just be a phase you are going through...

put it like this married men are not leaving their wives for you or anyone else...you will just be considered his side piece and thats it...no matter what he tells you...

find you a nice single man...i promise there are many of them available...and just bc a man is single doesn't mean something is wrong with him...it just means he is single.

Answer 5

Because you want something you can't have?

Answer 6

So are you attracted to married men or is it that you see him as some sort of challenge to you? Sort of the forbidden fruit. Maybe you enjoy seeing how far you can take things with these men, believe me after a while it will lose it's appeal. You are not going to find a relationship with someone who is married to someone else. It's all good that you like older men, but you should stick to older, single, men. Don't be a home wrecker, it's going to end up getting back to you in the end. You shouldn't stereo type single men either. Have you ever been single? Does this mean that no guy wants you? I think that I would think about what you are really doing when you go after these men. Just my opinion. Have a good one.

Answer 7

I have nothing but contempt for women like you.  Perhaps you like being used?  Or you enjoy being a homewrecker?  Whatever your issue is, get over it and find your own man.

Answer 8

The more my doctor tells me to refrain from red meat the more I want to fire up the grill.

Answer 9

Cause having something your told you cant is s**y.  Same reason why that Eve Chick Took that apple.  

Enjoy the fun.

Answer 10

Married men are great the same way other people's children are great.  You get to play with them when they're happy and someone else has to deal with them when they're not.

The problem is, you have to share.  He's committed to someone else, and if he did leave his wife you'd get the bad along with the good.

It's much better to find someone single.   A lot of men are still single at 30 because they've been working at their careers, so they're not only available, they're pretty eligible too.

Answer 11

STAY AWAY FROM MY HUSBAND!

Answer 12

It sounds like you have a narrow definition of what makes a man attractive. You said that if a man is single, then there must be a reason he is single. Did it ever occur to you that maybe the reason he's single is because he hasn't met you?

If you can attract married men, you can definitely attract single men.  If you deny a guy who's single, and deliberately choose a to be with a married guy, then you're not helping yourself or single guys at all. Expand your definition of what you consider attractive. I can understand why you like older men. There are quite a few older men who are single, attractive, and available.  I don't want some jealous wife to bury a meat cleaver in your forehead. It would be a waste of a beautiful woman.....you.

Answer 13

If you're attracted to older guys....fine.  But to only be attracted to men who have made commitments elsewhere is irresponsible and disrespectful on your part.  But karma is a wonderful thing - so perhaps, one day when you find your perfect man, some little tart will lure him away from you.  Good luck...

Answer 14

nice try justifying but the inescapable reason is because they're emotionally unavailable (probably no different than your dear old dad).

Answer 15

There are a few reasons a woman prefers older married men.

They are safer.  They already have a woman so you know inside they will not be asking for fidelity or faithfulness.

This means you can have your 'romance' all the while knowing its not going to lead anywhere you don't want to go.

Have you ever thought that what you are attracted to is the bad boy? After all, if hes playing around on his wife, there must be a reason he has chosen to be unfaithful.

That's not being better in all departments in my book.

One of the other reasons is the father complex.  

Another reason is money, they have it, newbies just out of school don't.

When you are ready for a real, loving relationship, you may choose an older man, but not a married one.  Way too much drama there, and he may already have kids and not want more.  Or you may not want a ready made family.

When you do marry, you will have a very different opinion of men who play around, you can trust me on that one.

Answer 16

There are three iron-clad rules I follow:

1.  I do not drink and drive.

2.  I go before I leave the house.

3.  I never mess(ed) with married men.

Pay attention, child.  Following the above will guarantee you do not get into situations you'll regret.

Answer 17

It's the idea of temptation.  You really can't have the married man, and that's what makes him so attractive.  If he's single, who cares, what's the challenge in that?  But the married guy, "Now let's see if I can get him interested in me."

At the risk of sounding like Dr. Phil, I don't think it makes you a bad person, but just becareful what your actions may cause.  They will hurt you, the guy, and his wife, and family.

Answer 18

They call this "golddigging", which means you are looking for flings that cause families to wreck and cause you to have children with fathers who belong to someone else.  Generally, golddiggers are looked down upon by their families and by society and are condemned.

Get a job and look for some one your own age.

Answer 19

I agree with a lot of others. Its probably because you feel jealous of the girl that has him, and even though you cant admit it to yourself, one of the main reasons you want him is just to prove to yourself that you could get him.  You feel attracted probably because you want to try to do everything in your power to get him, even though its probably impossible. Dont worry, everyone has that problem though, people are always attracted to people in a relationship.