Why am i always thought of as the girls "friend"?

Question

Im the nicest guy you will most likely ever meet. Im a strong Christian. i am constantly putting my self out there to help people. im smart im not an all a student but i make a's . Girls come to me with there problems because i all ways have good advise and I'm all ways here to help day or night I've actually help a few girls who were thinking of comiting suicide... they all ways say the same thing i think of you too much as a brother to see you as any more..... i guess its my falt because i get so close to the people i like but now im really close to this one girl that i like more then ive liked any other girl..... but she also just sees me as a friend even tho she will stay up talking to me untill 5am talking about things going on in her life.... i really really really really really like her..... she means so much to me.... and i just dont know what to do.

i talked to her about it once and she told me she felt the same and she likes me as much as i liked her.... but then a few weeks latter she met some guy and all of a sudden i was old news... she only sees me as her best friend i really don't know what to do...... im tired of only being wanted around when people need my help with something they take advantage of me because they know i will help no matter what...

i dont know what to do......

Answer 1

Several different reasons. One is that you're ready and willing to help people. I've spent years trying to "help" them, and once in a while I succeed. The problem with you, my friend, is that you just seem like her friend. She's comfortable with you, and that's great. You still have her a friend. It could've ended alot worse.

Second: You're opening line is "I'm the nicest guy you'll most likely ever meet". Now, this is gonna sound kinda harsh, but I really think that you should hear me out. It makes you sound a little concieted. Now, yeah I'm sure you're a great person and all, I'm just saying that that's the way the average person will see it. Just saying...

Third: As much as you care about her, there's just some things that aren't meant to be. If she found someone else and is happy with him and having you as her "best friend" then that's probably just someting that you've gotta accept and understand. Be thankful that you still have a friend, like I already said. It's always better to keep then to lose people in every one of these cases.

Lastly (and sorry that my answer's so long): If you feel that you're taken advantage of by the people that you're trying to help, why do you keep helping them? If you're answer is that it's just who you are, then don't complain. You choose this life. If you're tired of it and don't want to be taken advantage of by this "best friend" girl, then go talk to her and tell her that she can't have it both ways and that if she doesn't want to be with you, then that's fine. But you need to make a decision and either live with it, or cut it out of your life completely. I hope that you're happy with your decision. Good luck.