Why are French people so rude? Is it normal?

Question

I just came back from my first trip to Paris. I'm English and have manners. But I noticed the French did not. I know I'm stereotyping here and there are black sheep everywhere but I was truly shocked!

I was often shoved past by people with no apology. There were only two times I received an apology and both those times the other person was English. In most stores the staff were polite, but it was out in public generally I had this issue.

On one occasion I was on the RER, which was packed, and a man in his 50s literally shoved me out of the way and stood in my place, leaving me squeezed in between him and the pole, and NO APOLOGY!!

And the service in restaurants wasn't so great, we were often ignored!

Is the norm in France?

Answer 1

I've noticed from living here that Parisians have a different spacial awareness than most.  It's almost as if they don't have that sense where you feel someone behind you or look before they jump right in front of you.    I don't think it's rudeness, it's just a different mode of operation.  

I've learned to speak up and take the space that I need on the metro.  It took a while to get used to, but it's great when I'm having a pissy day.  

As far as restaurants, you gotta speak up also, and don't expect the coffee to taste good or to find good cheap sushi.

Answer 2

I am a New Zealander and the people in Paris have always been great when I have been there. In fact I find the English to be much more rude that pretty much anyone.

Answer 3

I'm french and I'm not rude, and by the way, it is totally ignorant to generalize, not everyone in Paris is rude, and being from the south of France, I kinda take offense of foreigners always giving the example of PARIS when they refer to France. Parisians are only 5% of the french population.

You giving the anecdote of the RER, which is a crowded place, mostly filled with working class people, metros are the same everywhere, filled with rudeness, people in a hurry etc...

Come to the south, you will be welcomed, people are known to be more courteous and welcoming... But again, that's anaother generality

Answer 4

Bonjour

im welsh and work in disneyland paris

the french are the sweetest people i no

ur trying to say that u never get annoyed and rude ?

this questrion is racist to the french

au revoir

Answer 5

I am sure that rudeness is common in many large cities all around the world. A lot of tenseness in large cities.  Probably if you were to venture into smaller country villages in France, you would probably find people more at ease. I have heard that about England. People living in the country were friendlier.

Answer 6

I think you'll find this is the "norm" (and the Frank and the John) in most capital cities. Capital cities don't really reflect the scope of the whole country. Have you been to London recently?

In answer to your edit 1..... I live in London, Some of my family originally come from a small village in the South West where everyone says hello to everyone even if they don't know them. I tried that in London. I thought I was going to get stabbed. I also went to a chinese restaurant in Dublin who had staff that were so rude I walked out. The only time I've ever done that in a restaurant. Thing is ppl in big cities are transient, if they don't get your business they'll get the business of the tourist who turns up the next week.

Answer 7

I'm sure you have manners and certain expectations, based on the customs in ENGLAND.  But things are different in France and especially in Paris.  Their customs and hence there "manners" are very different and this is something you apparently do not recognize.  There are different rules and "codes" followed in France.  If you don't understand their ways and customs you can get into trouble easily and then you set yourself up for what appears rude, when, in point of fact, you may have offended someone without even realizing it.  For example, did you begin every conversation with "Bonjour Madame or Monsieur"?  Have you ever said "Excusez-moi de vous déranger Madame, mais j'ai un problème."?  Do you attempt to exit at a door "out of turn" according to the French customs?  If you are not familiar with any of these things and a dozen more, then I submit to you that perhaps YOU were offensive to them right off, and were returned the 'favor'.  You have to understand the customs of others in their country, and RESPECT them, in order to get along and expect the same in return.

Now I am not defending rudeness or bad people and I am not trying to criticize you either (I know the English spell that word with an 's', in lieu of the 'z' we Americans use, for example) so you also have rules and customs I try to respect whilst in England.

Next time, try to learn more about the French, their customs, rules of behavior and perhaps you will enjoy your time more.  You have to understand that to the French, you are a total stranger and that immediately sets you up for certain treatment that can be easily overcome by just a basic understanding of them.  Below I will recommend a good book you might find helpful, if you really want to understand what went wrong.

Answer 8

Hello,

I am Greek. Last summer we visited Paris for a month and it was SO GREAT that we are going again on Tuesday! I found people in Paris warm. No one ignored us, no one looked down on us, no one refused to speak in english! Many times I tryed to communicate with my poor and awfull french and people switched to english, in order to help us.

My husband and I, have lived both for a while in Germany, and we thought that Paris would be about the same.

But I loved this FREEDOM, I loved the combination of a Mediterranean and a northern European in it's people. In fact this warm sense of the people there,  a smile is for me more important that a "thank you VERY much" etc, it's rather boring this continuing "excuse me very very much..." "so very much pleased to meat you indeed" "oh how can I show my thankfulness to you..." etc. Life should be simplier, I think... Well, that's my opinion.

Answer 9

The French do not like "ros boefs" (the English) any more than they like Americans. Why? Resentment that we saved their bacon twice in two successive world wars.

Answer 10

its true people in paris are extremely ignorant as i also found out when i went there but it is probabley the only place in france where people are that ignorant and yes it is normal i got exactly the same thing when i went next time go to somewhere else in france like marsielle hope this helps

:)

Answer 11

Hmmm...I've been to Paris four times, and I have yet to experience rude behaviour of any kind!

Answer 12

It is not the norm in France, but in Paris, or many big cities in the world.

Apologies are typically british or american, my wife is american and apologies all the time .... I don't. It is more normal, especially in Paris.

Service pretty long in a restaurant ... usual, particularly in a typical french restaurant, where meals are never prepared in advance. If you make the MISTAKE to pass your order in english, the service will be more long also.

Expecting apologies from a 50 years old man in the RER .... lol , at rush hour .... mega lol , perhaps myself, if I am in a good mood, what is never the case in the RER ^^

Answer 13

If Paris is so rude, is due to the fact that people there are more or less 80% strangers of all calibers -

Answer 14

as it said in "Les poupées russes", english are always sorry...

But seriously:

1) parisians are very different from the rest of french, and east people are diffrent from south people from west people, etc...If you go in the north west, like Rennes, you will be amazed how people are nice and friendly and polite (and I've never lived there, I just visit once). So don't generalize french if you just went to paris. parisians are alos rude for french people.

2) Maybe what is rude for you is not for us and waht is rude for us is not for you. Enven if we're neighbors...

3) People are very rude in the subway, that's a fact. And what you say is really okay, trust me. Go to Tokyo, you will see how weird is their "subway culture": there are people there to push subway customers in the wagons.

Answer 15

I answered a very similar question recently:

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;...

Answer 16

I don't think French people are rude as a rule...

I've met rude people in England...

Yes, France was occupied and liberated by Americans, British and others (French among them...). History cannot be resumed to one fact...The French army was not prepared and one man had warned about this : De Gaulle....

Answer 17

i won't repeat what others have already said but will add that i lived in grenoble, france and visited paris, london and other places in europe while i was there. i found the brits to be charming people at home, even in london, and to become the complete opposite elsewhere. truth is they don't know how to behave outside the uk and are known everywhere in europe for trashing every place they go to. outside their country they are condescending and have utmost disrespect for other cultures. ask some greeks or spaniards what they think of your manners... yeah it's another generalization and i have also met some great british people while traveling in the south of france or the alps who knew how to be curteous to the locals and adapt to the french culture. i still like england and its people but it's something i noticed and heard a lot of europeans complain about just so you know. i'm not implying you were rude, just wanted to point that such negative generalizations can be made about your fellow countrymen too. hope you'll give paris and france another chance and enjoy your next trip.

Answer 18

There's nothing abnormal with what you're saying.

As a Parisian, I find you a bit touchy ;-)

Answer 19

@ William K : sorry during WWI you HELPED us but you didn't SAVED us, the French were also fighting, we lost more men than you the Brits. It might have been longer but we would have won even though the Brits hadn't been involved in this war... you're always thinking you are the savior of everybody, that nobody would have existed without you !! that's madness, calm  down and repeat this word : HUMILITY. You're not the only country which has an army...

Answer 20

I totally agree. But don't think french people are like that, it's just Parisians. just go to the south of France and you'll notice the difference!

I went to London, and I was very surprised by the english politeness, it was even too much. You can hear 100 times "oh,I'm sorry" per day!

Answer 21

Hi, No, it's not normal, you want say "Parisians people", Paris is not "France",

Please, will you excuse this people, I am sorry, a lot of citizen, in the most important touristic cities in the world are arrogant, Cannes (french Riviera) too.

I wish you another trip in different regions, you will be received  better, Welcome

another time.

@ Yes Gold C, French people have forgotten the WW2, without english, american, australian, canadian, France was down and I am sad when I read that french don't like the "rosbeefs", believe me please, always there are french people who remember that, and me too !