Why are parents these days against hitting their children

Question

When I was growing up and miss beaheved, I got my *** whooped with a belt, as did many of my friends. Today you can not touch your little darlings without being screwed over by the cops.

I tell you if I am very tolerant with my 12 year old daughter, she can go out with her boyfriend, go to movies, etc. BUT she better be home at a certain time and if she is VERY late she too gets the belt sometimes. If she lies or refuses to to tell the truth, then she gets it even worse when I find out

Yet, there are many parents who are AGAINST any form of "hitting" of the child even with bear hand.

Even the bible say you can use corporal punishment on your children

Do you guys not think if more children where disciplined this way we would see les gangs, drop-outs, etc in the US

Answer 1

A boyfriend at 12? Hmmm, WOW!

Answer 2

this is insane.

first of all, no your daughter should not be going on solo dates when shes 12 years old. clearly shes not mature enough if shes always gettin beaten by her mother if shes not home on time, correct?

i mean, dont get me wrong, i do believe in discipline (sp?) but i do not think a parent should ever lay a hand on their child.

i was abused by my step dad as a child so i do know what its like. ive seen people who have also gone through this grow up with serious problems. i think hitting your kid is absolutely horrible and i will never put my kid through that, ever.  

Answer 3

yea because theri parents did the same thing

WElll its a lot lot better if you just talk to them just watch the effects of that seriously

Answer 4

I think it is great you let her go on dates and everything but i also go the belt when i was younger. i dont like it. At 12 years old and girl is starting to understand her body and if she looked at a p**n (just in case) would see spanking different. Isnt she embarassed to get the belt, i was. maybe you should do something eles. If you cant spank her hard enough dont use a belt. im not say dont punish her but, now a days you can get in big trouble for doing that even getting your kids taken away for something that small. Dont risk it. Maybe only do it if she does something crazy bad. Are you gonna do it when she is 17? i hope not.

Answer 5

A lot of parents are against hitting their children because recent studies have shown that it can damage the developing brain. It can also teach them violence. I see no problem with spanking your kid if they directly disobey you. However you need to draw the line. It's better for your kid to respect you then to fear you. I think 12 is a little old to be panked. They are at the point in their life where it should be give and take. They have things that they value so take that from them. Don;t let her see her boyfriend if she lies about where they were ( and 12 is way too young for them to be going out alone) enfore your rules but shes too old for a spanking.  

Answer 6

because americans are pussys

the parents who are against hitting their kids are obviously the ones with the pregnant daughters and drunk sons that hit and run some old lady.

Answer 7

It's because of the stupid laws now, you are NOT allowed to hit your child with anything except your bare hand across the butt like once or 2or 3 at the max, repeatedly is not ok, but to use a belt is against the law. So I hope children's services don't find out you use a belt or you're in trouble. Secondly at 12yrs old no she's not old enough to decide for herself when she thinks she is ready for a boyfriend, physically her brain is still developing and second so what happens when she wants to get pregnant at a young age, is that ok with you since she feels ready? even if she is only 13 at the time. like seriously, you need to step up your game here and start parenting your child, your not setting a good example by allowing her to date at such a young age. You're only allowing her life to be ruined too young.

Ok and if your daughter is so mature to decide she's ready to date, why are you still belting her then if she's so mature shouldn't she be pass needing such harsh punishment.

Answer 8

yeah ya know good to know before yourkid turns 20 you'll like to have grand children12 wow!!!!!!!!!!!11

Answer 9

I have 4 well behaved respectful boys and none of them have ever been spanked. Discipline is necessesary but spanking is only one choice. I am a strict parent and I am consistent. My kids know they need to follow the rules or there are consequences. They also know how to make good choices for the sake of it being the right thing to do and not just to avoid punishment.

Good parenting isn't all about punishing. It's how you parent in general. My oldest are 13 yr old twins who are both honor roll students. My 11 yr old is high honors. None of my kids have ever gotten into trouble in school. They rarely even need punishment at home. SO no, I don't think kids need to be spanked or hit with a belt. My kids behave because they want to make good choices and they have been taught right from wrong, NOT out of fear of being hurt.

Only weak ignorant people need to hit their children with a belt to get them to do what they want. If you can't outsmart a child and you need to resort to hitting them to instill fear, then you are an ignorant bully.

and if you still need to hit a 12 yr old then you went wrong somewhere. Kids that age should have developed at least some self discipline by that age and sadly you probably don't even know what self discipline is.

Answer 10

ya know, I'd comment about the spanking issue, but I am more appalled by the fact that your 12 year old has a boyfriend and is allowed to go on solo dates. I hope you look froward to being a grandma.  

Answer 11

No a12 year old should not go out on a date. The rule of thumb is16 and only in group dates(prom -homecomeing) not by yourself.when you turn 18 is a good year to go on single dates. Anyway, at 12 your not even mentally prepared to have a relationship-much less get through school.Let her take care of herself first then worry about boys.They soo can wait. I mean diapers were only ten years ago.(right) Do you want to be a gran-parent when she's 16? If they begin to date at 12 they start feeling like they have the privalige to do whatever they like -mainley because the parents let them grow up too fast. I was still playing with my cabagepatch doll at 12.Weren't you?Let her be a little girl for awhile-why rush her childhood? It will be ripped away soon enough.Spanking is for babies -little pow-pows-and no-nos-not full blown hitting-thats soo harsh. I was hit as a child it only embarrased me.It was not cool at all. It left scars on the inside and out.

Answer 12

We are becoming smarter and more developed as time goes on.  We have extra sets of problems but I think raising kids to respect their parents is the key.

Using a belt?  Come on.that is barbaric and violent.  Just b/c they are "your" kids does not give YOU the right to be violent with them and violate their bodies.

Try grounding them or using other forms of discipline.  Children should respect their parents, not fear them.

IMO....hitting kids is not a debatable topic for right vs. wrong.

Violence is violence and children are defenseless.

Please stop giving them a good ole fashion whoopin' - It's very hick and backwoods/ignorant

Answer 13

well solo dating at 12 is young and spanking with a belt is a little harsh but i do how ever believe that the reason kids are so wild these days is because parents just give them a "talk" instead of spanking their little butts i have 2 kids and they are very well behaved and have only had 2 or 3 spankings.....when children are little and dont understand a long talk they understand having their hand slapped for touching something that should not be touched like the electrical plug..... just like everything else moderation and knowing when and how is the key

Answer 14

I don't think that a quick swat on the bottom of a young child as a last resort is abuse.  I am, however, against hitting with objects.  And no, I do not believe that the lack of spanking is responsible for our problems with today's youth.  First of all, studies show that most parents still approve of corporal punishment and most still use it on their kids.  So I don't know why everyone is always saying how no one spanks their kids anymore.  I do not believe that the Bible tells you to spank your kids, because the "rod" used by shepherds was used to guide their sheep, not beat them.  Personally I believe that the Bible is telling you to use the rod of guidance, NOT to beat your kids.

Yeah, I'm expecting a multitude of thumbs-downs on this answer.  Just more proof that most people still approve of spanking!  But anyhow, I am just saying what my opinion is because, as a teen who was not spanked as a child and has turned out fine, I believe that there are better ways to discipline.  Even though I disagree with spanking, I don't go around giving everyone who approves of it a thumbs down, unless they say something rude.

Answer 15

Because hitting children causes serious psychological backlash to them, and other problems. Hitting is really a problem and I don't believe it is a good or productive way to raise children.  

Answer 16

Personally I'm against hitting children because what does it teach them? If your child had hit or bitten someone, and you were trying to teach them that being violent towards others is wrong, you couldn't do that by hitting - it's double standards. Hitting very young children is wrong because they have no way of understanding the difference between right and wrong, and all they know is that their carer has hurt them - if this happens regularly they'll grow up being afraid. I don't want that for my children - I want them to respect me, not fear me. I also think that hitting kids with things (belt, hairbrush, stick for example) is totally out of order - there is a difference between chastising your child with a slap on the legs and beating them with a belt. Here in the UK, it is illegal to hit your child hard enough to leave a mark, only mild smacking is allowed - there are obvious medical reasons for this, you could cause permanent damage.

There are better methods of disciplining your kids, my eldest is just 4, but knows the difference between right and wrong and knows that what we say goes - he has learned the hard way that misbehaving is no fun at all.

Answer 17

they might think its okay to hit people leading to gangs and violence lik

also the generation that got hit with belts and stuff are the older people right now look how that turned out

Answer 18

I think, on one hand, disciplining of kids got out of hand so people, with good intentions, they got out of hand by going to an extreme in terms of being against spanking and other physical forms of discipline.

There were and are cases where parents go beyond spanking to abusing their kids. And the tough thing is, where do we draw the line?

I personally believe in some forms of physical discipline, but not as a first resort. I'm not against spanking. But, generally, I would be against someone using a belt to discipline their kids.

You do sound too lenient on your kid, though.

Once the lawyers, police and government got involved with keeping parents from physically disciplining their children, parents became afraid to even so much as yell at their kids for fear of being called an abusive parent.

I was at a store some months back, and there were a mother and father talking to a girl who couldn't have been any more than 4 or 5, and she wanted the expensive edition of a videogame (might have been Guitar Hero), and they were trying to get her to buy the less expensive version, and at no point did they talk firmly to her. They spoke to her as if she were either a dainty flower or on their own level. They were acting more like the children, trying to persuade her to get something less expensive. And they were in front of the games I wanted to look for more than 20 minutes. They didn't move away for more than 20 minutes. It was pathetic to see a mother and father talking to their daughter as if they were scared of her. They weren't going to walk, it seemed, until she made it clear she was ready to walk away.

And, again, we wonder why children get away with what they do.

Answer 19

I spank my child but I don't spank her with a belt. I use my hand objects shouldn't be used I was spanked as a child and my dad would use the back of a brush but I don't want to use objects on my child. I think you may to re think your parenting your daughter is way way to young to have a boyfriend and go on solo dates guess what she is doing when your not around. you are going to be a grand mother if you don't put a stop to that.

Answer 20

Spanking is wrong and battery. Using a belt is physical abuse. Making them cry is physiological abuse. A bare buttocks is rape.  

Answer 21

i feel you my dad would hit me with branches from trees, phone wires etc. if i said curses or insults i got my asss whooped big time so yah parents these days are pansys my friends cursed theyre parents out and nothing happens its stupid thats why we have wannabe big shots who think they're tuff its stupid look at the hogan family for example theyre daughter brooke is a s**t and nick is p***y self-fish prick