Why are people so judgemental towards home schooling?

Question

In my psychology class at school we got on the subject of socialization. We have a lot of class discussions in that class. The topic switched from socializing to home schooled children and I happened to mention that I was home schooled until 4th grade.

I understand fully that everybody has their own opinions and I respect that. But the thing that really bugged me is that EVERYONE in my class had negative aspects towards home schooling. When I tried to view my point the teacher (yes the teacher) would automatically shove a negative side to what I had to say down my throat without listening to me.

This teacher is the basketball coach at my school and he didn't understand why I was getting offended that he would not hear me out. So to make him understand I turned around and asked him how he would like it if I began to sprout out stereotypes of basketball players and I asked him how he would like it if I then assumed (continued)

Answer 1

Why are people judgemental about homeschooling?  Primarily because they don't understand it.  A lot of stereotypes have grown up around it.  

-People assume that homeschoolers are either religious zealots or hippy freaks.  These are the groups that get the most public attention.

-Some homeschoolers have been very vocal opponents of more typical methods of education.  It's hard not to get your back up when you are accused of harming children day after day.

-The media loves to report on homeschool families that have suffered some terrible scandalous tragedy.  It's never pointed out that abuse or other dysfunction may have contributed.

Ultimately it's up to those who support homeschooling to help those who don't understand.  Find out about the studies comparing social skills of homeschool students with public school students.  Share them with the teacher outside of class.

Here is the name of a study that has recently gotten a lot of attention:

Dr. Larry Shyers, "Comparison of Social Adjustment Between Home and Traditionally Schooled Students," unpublished doctoral dissertation at University of Florida's College of Education, 1992. Dr. Shyers is a psychotherapist who is the Chairman of the Florida Board of Clinical Social Work, Marriage and Family Therapy, and Mental Health Counseling.

There are lots of sources online too.

Answer 2

Ask this "psychball" teacher to define socialization and explain the purpose of socialization.  Usually it is to perpetuate society as it presently exists.  Tell him you'd just as soon be an agent of change since it presently is not doing so well.  And you can only do that if you aren't "socialized."

Answer 3

"all home schooled children are anti-social (as he puts it). "

your teacher is a moron.

only an imbicile would make such generalizing assertions about a group of millions of people they haven't even met.

Answer 4

"My question is why do you personally think that people are so judge mental about home schooling and children who are home schooled?"

If they have misconceptions and are just going on those misconceptions but are open to having them cleared up, that's not being judgemental. What you described was narrow-minded judgementalism at its core. This is the result of some form of "brainwashing" (you hear it enough it *must* be true, right? which means you can't accept something contradicting it?) or the result of a generally close-minded, judgemental individual.

Answer 5

When it comes to teachers, those who are against homeschooling often feel threatened by the success of homeschoolers, and insulted that someone who perhaps never stepped foot in a college would claim to be qualified to do what they studied years to learn to do.  It bothers them even more when they see that the parent can indeed successfully educate their children.

In my opinion it makes no sense for a teacher to threatened or insulted, most homeschooling parents would admit that they would have great difficulty teaching a class of 30 kids they had never met before.  Homeschooling and public schooling require very different things from the teacher.  I am glad that the teachers in Public School go to college to learn their craft.  I just don't think a certificate is needed in order for me to privately teach my own kids at home.

As far as other people's opinions... I don't know.  It is very aggravating.

Answer 6

It's funny that that's the ONLY argument people seem to have when it comes to homeschooling. The only thing they can find wrong with it is that they think homeschoolers aren't socialized.

Now, I'll give them the benefit of the doubt because I have met homeschoolers who are very unsocial. But, I've met more kids who go to public school who are just as (if not more) unsocialized than homeschoolers.

People who are against homeschooling are simply ignorant on the subject. They don't understand it. They assume we are holed up in our houses all day and that we never leave..we just sit inside and read all day. If they would do more research they would see that that's not true.

Homeschoolers actually tend to be *more* social. Studies have shown that homeschoolers tend to be leaders and they are able to not only socialize with kids their own age, but with adults as well.

I'm not one to call names (usually), but your teacher sounds like a jerk. Actually, certified teachers are usually the ones who are most against homeschooling. I've actually seen teachers use the argument that "parents should not be teaching their children because they are not certified". Okay, so parents are not smart enough to teach their own children? That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard.

Homeschooling has been around longer than public schools...that says it all right there.

The kids I know who go to public school are weirdos. They spend 7 hrs. a day with other kids and talk about s*x and who has the best clothes and that makes them "socialized"...and if that's the case I'd rather not be "socialized".

People think that homeschoolers don't experience "real world situations". What a load of c**p. It's because of people who think this that homeschoolers DO learn how to act in "real world situations". We have to learn how to stand up for ourselves just like and kid in public school. The only difference is, is that we learn how to do it properly.

Answer 7

Well let me be the first to say................................. he's a BASKETBALL COACH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!...  and a "psych" teacher !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

OK that explains his vehement adherence to an opinion about which he likely has no personal experience.    And as far as "everyone" in your class agreeing with Coach Open Minded that would be evidence of  something called groupthink.  Here is the Wikipedia definition (I am not a fan of Wikipedia, but this is actually fairly accurate)

Groupthink is a type of thought exhibited by group members who try to minimize conflict and reach consensus without critically testing, analyzing, and evaluating ideas. During Groupthink, members of the group avoid promoting viewpoints outside the comfort zone of consensus thinking. A variety of motives for this may exist such as a desire to avoid being seen as foolish, or a desire to avoid embarrassing or angering other members of the group. Groupthink may cause groups to make hasty, irrational decisions, where individual doubts are set aside, for fear of upsetting the group’s balance. The term is frequently used pejoratively, with hindsight.       (Wikipedia)

And oddly enough, I learned that in a psychology class, I believe 201.  So there you go.  He was probably trying to teach the concept of group think by leading a classroom full of well socialized lemmings down his certified path.  

Now really.  I am a homeschooling mother and am the first to say that this is not for everyone.  And I do believe that there are many great teachers out there. I myself had some great ones in public school!   But I also believe that there are just as many mediocre to lousy teachers out there who wouldn't be able to do the job they do if they didn't have the curriculum spelled out to them in outline form.   Rather than dazzling us with their superior teaching ability, they spend class time spouting personal opinions and shutting out legitimate debate which, God forbid, might lead to learning.

When I practised nursing years ago, it was a time when insurance companies were just starting to send people home early (earlier than they should have) and many were very sick.  I was an RN who was supposed to teach their family members, often a high school graduate or less, to do patient care.  I mean REAL patient care:  ventilators, tracheotomy care, catheters, suctioning, injections of narcotics, assessments and even charting.  The real deal.  I thought this was ludicrous  ..............until I just taught them...........suddenly I realized that pretty much anyone could do what I had been trained to do with the right instructions and a love for the patient that knew no bounds.  When you love someone (like a homeschooling parent)  you can move mountains.  Believe me, no one who did poorly on a subject or missed a high school dance ever died (like a vent patient who might get poor care) . Nursing isn't rocket science (yes, nurses, I know there is more to it than the mechanics but play along here) and neither is teaching.   Bottom line is I think we all need to get over ourselves and stop thinking that no one else can do what we do.

So don't feel bad, just consider the source (or sources.-but at least they are socialized!)

Answer 8

A lot of people think that students who are homeschooled are not as smart as the students that go to public schools.

Work that is done by students who are homeschooled are more vigorously graded than of the work that is graded by a teacher who teaches public school. There is more one on one attention in a homeschooling environment so a student can learn better.

Answer 9

I feel for you.  I am a mom who homeschools two elementary-aged boys.   I am surprised you got such a negative response from your class!  Very often my sons will be told that their friends wished they could be schooled at home.

In any case, your teacher should have given a more mature response that would have allowed you to speak for yourself and respect your position.  

I think the biggest issue is the 'socialization' myth.  Mnay people assume that home schoolers are kept in a locked room and not allowed to see other children.  Studies are showing, however, that those who are home schooled fare much better in social situations than their publicly-schooled peers.  

My boys get so much time with others, I have to pull in the reigns once in a while just so we can make sure we're getting our work done.

Also, I wonder if many public teachers might feel offended that we moms think we can educate our children without having spent four years at a university learning how to do so.   In my home school network alone, I know three moms who all taught in public schools before opting to stay home and teach their own children.  All three have said on separate occasions that a college degree in education does not in any way prepare someone to educate at home.  They are completely different - but just as competent - arenas.

I hope that helps.  I have been home schooling my children for over 7 years.

Answer 10

Well i agree that saying "all" home-schooled children are...is a stereotype.  I do also know why they have such a negative perception.  Sometimes home schooled people, now grown and or still younger, that were home-schooled tend to be socially awkward.  They don't always know whats offensive, how to react when angry with someone, how to engage in a conversation with someone etc., but not all of them are like that.  Some but not all.  

People tend to think along these lines, "a majority of the world is going to school with a class of 25 kids and they socialize and a kid is at home with just mommy.  That's their reality.  What mommy or daddy thinks.  Even if they play with their sibling or neighbors.  They aren't seeing how it is to engage with several different personalities day after day.  They don't get to hear other teachers, other students and other ways of thinking."  And it sometimes that's true and with others it isn't. I actually know a couple homeschooled kids who are very social--as far as talking to people, being polite etc., but i also notice some aspects of their lives are very sheltered--for the good and bad.  I don't agree with  what one of the responses was about kids in public schools talking about s*x and etc., thats sheltering. but I don't think home schooling is that bad either.

Now, you were home-schooled until 9 yrs old so, That's not that bad.  So I do think your teacher is a little knuckle-headed and sounds like a person who's been "home-schooled" himself seeing that he would treat you like that in front of people.  Plus he should've had a more objective viewpoint regardless or his feelings.

Answer 11

It's not a matter of being "anti-social" it's a matter of not developing a social awareness within the group dynamic which is actually evidenced by your thinking that they were ganging up on you and you taking extreme offense to what happened.  It is a very rare occasion for anyone that is homeschooled to be able to acclimate normally to average social situations.

Answer 12

They don't understand it and they don't want to.

I've found that people usually decide I have social issues after they find out I'm homeschooled, even if they thought I was great before.

Nobody supports having a kid stuck at home all day, never going outside, learning, or being exposed to other people.

The term for people who do that is, "child abuser." Not, "homeschooler."

Just let them be idiots and laugh at the irony of it. "Our system teaches you to accept people with different beliefs, and if you disagree with me, you're wrong."

Answer 13

Actually, steroetypes can exist on the positive end as well. My daughter wanted to go to ps for her senior year as a test flight before going off to a distant college. She has been homeschooled all her life until now. Most of what I found was a prejudgement that she must be gifted and talented. LOL.

Specific to the socialization side of things though, homeschoolers are judged more harshly because the spotlight is on them when they enter the school system. Any time you feel the spotlight to be on you, you feel nervous and awkward. It happens the first day on the job, when you are around someone you want to impress such as you first meeting with future in-laws, any new group where you are in the position of 'learning the ropes' and being accepted. It is sad that if a homeschool's nervousness is detected they get slapped with a label. My daughter felt nervous and the adjustment was tiring for the first few weeks of school this year, but then she felt comfortable enough to just be herself and relax. The irony is that the school culture thinks that the first few weeks of nervousness was the homeschooling and her relaxing after a few weeks was proof that 'see there now, a few weeks with us and she is fixed'. LOL.

One thing that I am glad about is that the homeschool kids do not behave that way. When kids are newly coming in to homeschooling from public schooling, all I have ever seen is kindness and effort to make them feel a part of things. So who is showing greater evidence of the better social skills?

Now homeschool moms... that hasn't always been as consistent. I have seen homeschool group adults being downlright unfriendly to virtual families. I have seen a few minor skirmished over homeschool philosophy. But the kids have always been open, polite, and friendly.