Why are so many people so down on public breastfeeding?

Question

I gotta tell ya, this isn't filling me with confidence. I was hoping to be able to overcome the nerves and be a success at breastfeeding my second baby. Having said that the only 'public' places around where I live to be doing it are a kids playcentre and women's neighbourhood centre so it shouldnt be too hard. No wonder breastfeeding women have to feel so strongly about it with all these negative judgemental people scrutinising them. More power to publicly breastfeeding women I say! Surely other women don't get grossed out by breastfeeding do they?

Answer 1

I ran into the same problems when breastfeeding each of my four children.  I would rather have a woman breastfeed her child than let it cry because it is hungry or won't take the bottle.  

Nursing is natural and beautiful.  Don't let uptight people who would rather feed their children processed formula ruin the experience for you and your child.

Answer 2

I believe it's because for the past 100 or so years, b*****s in the US have been seen as sexual objects only.  It is unfortunate.  New mothers need all the support they can get, and being afraid to go out in public because the baby may need to eat and a stranger may make a rude comment is completely unnecessary.  We need laws protecting moms in all 50 states, as well as an educational campaign so that all businesses/restaurants know not to interfere with a nursing mother.  It will take time, but I'm optimistic.

As far as "whipping your b***s out", lol.  I hear that argument a lot but it just doesn't hold up.  I don't know of any moms who would "let it all hang out" when feeding their children.  In fact, most of the time it's hard to even tell if a baby is nursing.  Their head covers anything that a shirt does not.  I just do not understand people being offended by seeing the back of a baby's head that just happens to be positioned over the mother's breast.  

Answer 3

Only those with maturity issues have problems with it. I go with the, if you don't want to see it then don't look, attitude.

Answer 4

move to europe

Answer 5

I think a lot of people (yes, women included) feel that b*****s are sexual and shouldn't be "out" in public. Personally, I think that as long as women are being as discreet as possible and aren't letting them hang out for the world to see, it's not a problem. I never breastfed in public though because my son had a really hard time latching on...it usually took a good 510 minutes to get him to latch, so my breast was out for everyone to see...LOL...I never did get the hand of the whole "blanket over the shoulder" idea. It just wouldn't stay there!  

Answer 6

I guess everyone just chooses to ignore that b*****s are actually meant for feeding, not just for enjoyment. What I think makes it even worse is people will think it is wrong not to breastfeed, (how many times did you have to hear "Your going to breastfeed right? while pregnant?) but no one wants to see it. I suppose its hard for everyone to accept that breastmilk isn't always going to be fed from a bottle.  

Answer 7

I didn't breastfeed my daughter past 10 days for so many reasons...one of them the public feeding thing.

My son I breast fed him where ever and while I never let it all hang out, you should have seen some of the looks I got while doing so. You really can't win. Breast feed and be proud, or don't and be proud......who cares, the general public are just that...general.

Answer 8

I can completely relate! I am currently breastfeeding my third child, and I still get a bit nervous when it comes to breastfeeding in public....however, I have a Maya Sling, which makes it much more convenient and easier to do. As with many babies that seem to have a difficult time latching and staying on the breast, it is in part due to the fact that when you are nervous or anxious the baby can sense it and can/may react.

I completely agree with many others that have answered, you should NOT have to go somewhere else to feed your baby....when any other child/person is eating they are not asked to do so else where, just the same as with a bottle fed baby, they too are not asked to eat else where..there is no difference with a breastfed baby.

This society is too focused on the breast as a sexual thing, when in fact that the reason they are there are for BREASTFEEDING!

I would not eat my food in a restroom, nor would I ask someone else to do so, why should my baby have to eat there??

As for Paul G, noo a baby can NOT wait 10 minutes to eat...if you are starving would you appreciate someone telling you to wait ten minutes to eat, and then ask you to eat it in a bathroom or your car simply because they do not wish to be around you when you eat? I would think not!

Stay strong, and don't give up on doing what is the very best thing for your baby.

Here are some links to very helpful wraps when you are nursing, whether it be around certain people that make you nervous while nursing, or just plain nursing in public.

http://www.lactationconnection.com/Searc...

http://www.mayawrap.com/products.php

http://www.walmart.com/catalog/product.d...

I wish you the best of luck!

And ignore those that wish to be rude, they are probably just mad and/or jealuos that they couldn't/wouldn't breastfeed!

Breastfeed and be PROUD!

Answer 9

Do you mean that businesses ban breastfeeding in their premises or force you to go to a toilet to do it, or that other people in those places make you feel bad for feeding there?

Either way, it's a pathetic attitude from them - You do'nt have to flop a t*t on the table to feed a baby - I wish they'd just get over it.

Personally, it *did* take me a couple of weeks to feel comfortable about breastfeeding in public, but I've found that my city is very baby-friendly, with most shopping centres offering quiet feeding rooms if you're uncomfortable (or if your baby just wants to look around at all the distractions... ouch!) and every cafe or restaurant I've patronised has been fine with it.

I think it probably helps that most states in Australia have legislation that outlaws discriminating against breast-feeding mothers.

Please try and overcome your nerves and feed in public! Using shawls or wraps can help shield your b*****s from perverts who just want to stare - chin up, hon!

edit: and don't let people tell you to go to the toilet to feed your baby - ask them if they'd eat their meal in there!

Answer 10

My wife did it and I don't see a problem with it. She aways covered up. Eating is a natural thing to do!

Answer 11

I think a lot of people are embarrassed and maybe some women are not modest enough(just my opinion). If you use a blanket to cover yourself and don't make a big deal about it there shouldn't be a problem. Just don't expect everyone to understand that this is a natural and normal thing to do.  

Answer 12

i dnt have a problem with public breastfeeding as long as its done tastefully. i have seen plenty of women who just pull out there boob rite then and there without a blanket or anything. soo as long as its done respectfully i think it is fine.  

Answer 13

im not uncomfortable with breast feeding. im not uncomfortable with babies or breast i just feel that some times it isnt the time or the place to be breast feeding. when i have been traveling in certain places i have seen it in mall food courts and other public places and thought it was almost impolite.. but perhaps something needs to be done about it. nursing areas/nursing rooms... i feel like its almost a form of exhibitionism and some women enjoy their right to excercise it.. cant a baby wait ten minutes ?..

Answer 14

I'm a woman and a mother of 2. I breast fed each of my children for over a year. I always did it in a private place, or at least out of plain sight, out of respect for everyone. Why do people have to make it out to be an issue of either starving your baby or doing it right in the middle of everyone?

As much as you would like it to not be the case, seeing a woman with her breast out of her shirt (even if it is being covered by a blanket) can make a lot of people uncomfortable. Not everyone has had children, and to a young man (for example) who has only experienced b*****s as a sexual object, it can be confusing. My husband is VERY shy, and when he sees a woman breast-feeding in public, it makes him feel uncomfortable and a little embarrassed. He is a very mature man, he's just not comfortable with having to think of b*****s outside of his own home. I think that shoving it the faces of people like that, even if it is natural, it not polite. Our whole bodies are natural, but that does not give us reason to expose them in public.

There should always be a way to slip under the radar to breast feed. In over two years of doing it myself, I never found a problem with it. Go out to your car instead of breast-feeding at the restaurant table, or go into the ladies room instead of the middle of the mall. You should never deny your baby breast milk when he/she wants it, but there are always discreet ways of doing it. You should never have to make others uncomfortable by flaunting it.

Answer 15

First of all  as much as our b*****s have become an object of sexual desire, They were first meant to feed our children!

Breast feeding is not illegal in any capacity and no one has the right to tell you you can not feed your child when your child is hungry.

With that said I cover up for my own comfort not everyone elses.Choosing to breast feed my child should not mean I need to isolate myself, Or hide away so someone else feels better about it.

good luck to all the breastfeeding moms and next time someone glares at you for feeding your child in public be polite and offer them some. :)  just kidding

Answer 16

Yeah, I understand where you're coming from.  I was lucky to never encounter that sort of negativity when I was nursing my kiddos.  You just have to go about your business and be as discreet as you possibly can be, and YES, you can feed in the middle of Wal Mart or the food court or wherever you happen to be discreetly, and it doesn't have to involve draping yourself and the baby under a tent that screams "Hi!  I'm breastfeeding a baby under here!"

As for the pervs of the world, they're going to look anyway.  Is it your fault if some nasty pervy guy gawks at you while you're feeding?  What's he gonna see besides your baby's head?  That's like saying that a rape victim was attacked because she was pretty.  Honestly, people need to get a grip.  If they're so concerned about the pervs, blame the pervs, not the normal people who are just trying to make it through the day.

Paul G. infants cannot wait 10 minutes for a need to be met.  Toddlers and preschoolers can wait a few minutes, but a baby cannot.  Babies become secure and confident individuals by having their needs met immediately and lovingly.  Otherwise they become insecure, clingy, and unsure of their world.  What's wrong with you, didn't your mother feed you when you needed fed?!

Answer 17

Some people, men or women, are just uncomfortable with seeing a stranger's b*****s. I personally don't care and I agree with you that it's not a big deal, but other people may not be as open. If you are getting strange glances, you could cover your chest with a light blanket or towel. But if you honestly don't mind, people will just have to deal with it.

Answer 18

Even woman sometimes find it wrong to nurse in public which is just plain sad.  Woman should be more understanding of it and supportive even if they choose to do formula instead they should respect another mothers right to feed her baby by breastfeeding even in public.  I think that as long as you cover it up there shouldn't be no problem with it, you are just wanting to do what is best for your baby.  I know the first time i was in a room with a nursing mom I was 16 and working as a childcare provider on the weekends for a local program and at first I was feeling weird about it because i hadn't been around it before but after awhile i adjusted just fine because it is just natural.  As long as I don't have to see the boob hanging out and my boys are seeing another woman's boob just hanging out I am ok with it.  I do agree though that a nursing mom should always cover up in public or if there are children around that aren't her own.  

Answer 19

I think its naturally and beautiful

So breastfeed anywhere you please its not against the law

=]

Answer 20

I'm the same as you i don't like feeding in public but i just put a blanket over my shoulder and no one could see a thing it was easy and honestly allot of women judge other feeding mums just as much as males that's why i would feel uncomfortable doing it  

Answer 21

there's nothing wrong with breastfeeding in public.  mothers just need to make sure that they're not letting their b*****s highly exposed.=)

Answer 22

I think that as long as you cover the feeding up with a blanket...who cares! Now if you are just whipping it out like it's nothing; that's overboard. Nobody wants to see your boob in public and their are laws against it even if you have a baby to attach to it. Just be discreet and do what you have to do. I don't think that's too much to ask. Best wishes.