Why are so many people so fearful of visiting loved ones who are dying?

Question

I visit my uncle every morning, and appreciate every moment I have with him.

Answer 1

It can be various reasons: fear of facing the truth (if they don't see it they can pretend it's not happening), or wanting to put it out of their mind. Or they can not know what to say and so attempt to avoid the awkward conversations or blunders. Or they might want to remember the person as healthy and find it too painful to see them weak and vulnerable. I don't think you can come up with one reason for everyone.

Answer 2

I think that's because they are afraid of the pain that comes with losing somebody you love. it's great if you are able to appreciate the time you have left with your loved one but i think that a lot of people just don't want to deal with the fact that they are going to lose somebody who's import and to them and seeing that person is just going to make that feeling even worse. also, i think that lots of people might be afraid of seeing their loved one in pain, because when somebody you love is in pain and there is nothing you can do about it, that can make you feel extremely helpless and sad and i could imagine that many people are afraid of feeling that way.  

Answer 3

Maybe they think death is something that is catching? I know the reason I stayed away when my grandparents were dying. It's because I wasn't ready to let go of them yet. Yes, I know it would seem that I had already let go by not going up to see them. I seen my grandmother before her death and she had went down hill so badly that it was like visiting with a total stranger. My grandfather looked more like his self before his death but in his last days I couldn't handle going up to see him again I just wasn't ready to let go yet.It's stupid huh?

Answer 4

its not really fear its the fact most ppl want to remember the good times not on the death bed and so much un explained can happen there my grandma talked to spirits when she was passing me and my mother had both heard a make one through a moniter we had on her and no males were in teh hous at the time

Answer 5

It's hard to see them go through the cancer.  My grandfather has cancer and I love him to death. I try to see him at least once a week, but I'll admit, it breaks my heart sometimes to see him that way. I know it raises his spirits to see me, and like he told me, although his body seems to be on its way to heaven, his mind hasn't left yet. So, he's still sharp and funny as ever, he just doesn't have all the energy he used to.

Best of luck with you and your uncle.

Answer 6

I think it is because for some it brings to the forefront the reality of death.  If they never see the dying person, they won't have to deal with the change in appearance and their own mortality.  The thing I have found though, after being with both my mother and my husband when they died is the look of them in that deathbed has faded and my memories of both involve younger healthier days. It might be how my mind dealt with it since both were very ill for a long time and changed radically.  Your uncle is lucky to have you because the bottom line is the person who is dying not the person who thinks they can't deal with the loss.

As hard as it was to be with a loved one at the time of death, I would not trade that experience for anything in the world.