Why are some devistated infirtile couples?

Question

ok with accepting it as a fact, even if their dream was to have a family.....while other couples (even those not infirtile) strive to adopt?

Answer 1

how someone chooses to build their family as long as it is legal and ethical is no ones business but their own.  

why can't some people accept the world is not black and white and not every situation is a one size fit's all?  there are always different circumstances to every situation.  you won't ever grow as a person if you can't look at every angle of something and keep assuming.

am i wrong for wanting to teach a child how to be a loving accpeting human being?  am i wrong to teach my child how to handle opinions that are different from hers in an educated, but yet kind mannor?  there's nothing wrong with wanting to be a parent.  

accepting infertility and then adopting are two different things if done right.  you must get past the fertility issues before you can bring any child into your home to raise.

Answer 2

Hi,

I am sub-fertile, i really don't understand your question.

x

Answer 3

i think a lot of them just dont think adoption is for them. or dont like the thought of IVF or donor sperm or eggs.. some people just want their "own" child and thats it. and for some women to them its about the experience of being pregnant.

Answer 4

because some feel that if they can't have their own children, then they don't need to have children.. that's okay

others, think about (what you seem to refuse to believe), the fact that there are thousands of children who NEED homes... there are children in foster care looking for a "forever home"

So they say to themselves.. "why not adopt?"

Answer 5

because everyone is different; some have different goals, wants and needs in their lives; for some, getting an education and working 15 hrs a day in a job they love is far more important than having a family; others are very happy being a stay at home mom taking care of their families while other women want to climb to the top of the corporate ladder.

everyone has their own choices and they're not taking some lower class baby and snatching it for their very own -- look at sunny -- she says over and over how wealthy her bfamily was and still they didn't want her...so i think that's proof there.

why can't you accept people have different ideas?

Answer 6

It depends on who they are. People react to things differently.

Answer 7

Families are created in many different ways.  Just because a couple is infertile doesn't mean that they can't or shouldn't be parents.

Answer 8

Ever heard of Spell Check?

Answer 9

they do, more then likely

they don't want to wait.

also its an ego thing.

but children are golden.

whom ever can afford

to care for them.

laney

Answer 10

For some blood/dna  is not everything. For those couples who cant have natural children and ONLY want natural children they aren’t going to look to adopt are they?    In some cases they may know they would never be approved to adopt. Adoption is not for everyone, having kids period is not for everyone.  

There are thousands and thousands of children, teens, toddlers and some babies that need to be adopted, that is a fact. For those couples who are willing to adopt a child after they have been deemed infertile. Being a parent a mommy or daddy is becomes more important.  As far as those who are not infertile who choose to adopt well they want to give a home to again child(ren) that needed it. They might see no reason to bring more (or a great deal more) people into this already overpopulated plant.

Answer 11

Why are some people devastated by the fact that they are adopted, and cant accept that the decision was made and cant be changed, and continue to whine their way through life........................while other adoptees accept that what was done was done and get on with making the best life they can for themselves?

Your question has no point other than to insult and wound people already hurt by the fact that theyre infertile.  Get over your pathetic little temper tantrum at life!!  YOU HAVE NO RIGHT to continually attempt to hurt and discourage others.

Adoption can and does help thousands upon thousands of otherwise unwanted, yes I said unwanted!!, children have a life.

Answer 12

Different strokes for different folks...

Answer 13

There are already enough kids on this planet and a surprising number of them are unwanted by their birth parents. Adoption seems like a perfect solution and with no stretch marks.

Answer 14

Everyone is different, you know that. Just like you have claimed that "you would never adopt", that does not mean everyone feels the same as you do. Everyone is entitled to their opinion, and choices in this life. I wish people would start supporting others in this forum rather than bashing them all the time (not meant towards your question, just some answers I have read recently).  Where's the love???? Geesh!

Answer 15

I accept that I am infertile and cannot have biological children.  I AM eligible and able to adopt.  If I was ineligible or unable to adopt, I would have to accept that, too.  Adopting a child does not mean that I haven't accepted the fact of my infertility.

Answer 16

i tried different fertility treatments and failed.  so right now i am trying to lose a whole lot of weight and then we will try again.  i am only 28 so i got time.

we would love to have children but if it never happens then thats okay.  

the way i feel is i don't have a kid than  i don't know whats its like. so i can't really cry for that kid that never happened.  

my husband has a past so they would never let us adopt children.

Answer 17

i don't understand your question. we can't afford invetro.

Answer 18

It all depends on their state of mind.

Answer 19

I am one of those infertile who tried for many years.  We have decided to adopt, and older children at that.  Do I still grieve not having a biological child?  Yep.  Will I cherish my adopted children?  yep.  

When people come into adoption like I have, it has to be okay to acknowledge the loss the feel.  The children as well will feel their loss at losing their bio parents.

Answer 20

I felt as if I was broken. It's natural to procreate. What separates men and women is the ability to have children. From the time we are little girls we are "trained" to raise a family that's why we all played with dolls and played house. My husband wanted children and I wanted to give him children. To not be able to do what you are "expected" to do since childhood is devastating. I felt like I was failing my husband and our families. ( I eventually got over myself...my grief) but it is a process that is different for everybody.