Why are some people not content with just one child?

Question

I am. I am happy with my only son. Why is it people feel the need to only have kids to give their kid a sibling? That is no reason to have another child in my book. What do you all think?

Answer 1

Well "your book" is not the same as "my book" or anyone else's "book".  I'm glad you are happy with your one son, but others feel the need to nurture and love more than one child and some people want big families.  

I have two children.  I didn't have another child just to give me son a sibling.  I had another child, a daughter, because I wanted to share my love with another child and because our family was complete with her.  

You ask why I think?  I honestly think that you are being a little too high on your horse about only having one child.  If it's your cup of tea, fine.  But your cup of tea ("book") is not the same as everyone elses.  Please don't criticize or put down others for feeling differently.

Answer 2

I want 3 or 4 children in a few years. Yes, they'll always have someone to play with, but I always dreamed of having a big family. Growing up, I was alone a lot of the time. [though I have 2 sisters, we didn't have any other family] I never got to have the family reunions and functions. I'd love to be able to have a big family. I love children, and think it's one of the most rewarding things in life, as well.

Answer 3

Because I love having and raising my daughter and can't wait to do it again someday. some people are happy with just one and thats fine. I'd like 2.  

Answer 4

i have 2 children and I'm pregnant again and i did not have my second just so my first had a sibling there are 9 years between them ,

I was on birth control the second time and it failed so i ended up with my 6 year old.

The third time i was on the in plant and have managed to fall pregnant,and there will be 7 years between the 6 year old and new born when he/she arrives

Answer 5

I have always wanted to have 3 kids. I could never understand why someone would only want one. Then I read something that made it very clear to me. Every woman (and probably man) just knows when their heart is complete. For some couples their family is complete when they get married, for others it’s after 1, 3 or 7 children. You just have that feeling inside you that you feel complete, that no one is missing. That you have the perfect family for you.

i have 7 other siblings and we are so united together.

i wouldn't know what it's like not having them all around.

Goodluck on your choice.

Answer 6

That's you. Everyone has their own preference and while you want only want 1 some people want 5&6. They feel that they have so much love to offer a child and that they can handle it. It sometimes can be about the only child being lonely but that is not always the case. Only children think about all the things they could share with a baby brother or sister. Or how exciting it would be to help feed and hold the baby. It's always going to be a "what if" factor for them

Answer 7

I think your preference is your business and my preference is my business.  I don't have any specific opinions about having one child or more than one.  To each his own!  If you are taking great care of your child and being the best parent you can be, then you are doing all that matters.  It makes no difference how many or how little children one has.  It matters more how good a parent you are to the child/ren.

Answer 8

Well some woman have that need to nurture a child inside of themselves whether it be one, two, or more times. I mean, you know it's a wonderful experience. Some people love kids and love to bring more in there home. It's all just a preference.

Answer 9

I have 3.  I always knew I wanted 2-4 children.  I like having kids around and all.  My eldest is 3 and my twins are 20 months old.  I did not have more than one just to give my eldest a sibling.  I wanted a medium size family.  I will also not be having anymore children so I and my husband are done.(I know bad grammar)

Answer 10

It's a personal decision.

My husband and I both grew up w/ siblings, who we love dearly, and we wanted our oldest to have that bond with someone also.

Answer 11

At first, I was very ambivilant about kids.  I would have been fine with none.  Then once pregnant,  I was totally convinced that I only ever wanted one child.  When my daughter was born, we were happy,   We planned and received one child.  It was hard work and we truly never wanted to go through all that newborn stuff again.  

<<<<<<<HOWEVER>>>>>>>>  around 15-18 months, they get really cute.  They are past the newborn stuff.  They sleep. They are funny, they play, they interact, their little personalities start to really shine.  They amaze you every single day.    

So as a result, I now have 3 kids!  There are many days I can't believe it myself and while life is chaotic and complex, it is how is should be, for me.

Here's what I didn't expect;  I did not expect to see how much the 3 kids enrich each other.  I wouldn't site that as a reason to have more kids but I can't imagine my kids without each other.  I surely would not have a baby just to have a sibling but it is a huge factor in each of their lives.  

It is strictly a personal choice and I would have been fine with having 1 child if no more came along.  

Answer 12

I have always wanted to be a mother, and I have always wanted a handful of children.  A big family is a happy family in my mind.  More people is more excitment, challenges and love.

As a big family grows you get larger and larger with marriages and births of new babies.  Aunts, uncles, cousins, etc.  Family gatherings, holidays, are all big and bountiful.  Children are blessings from God!

The more the merrier at my house!

To each their own though.

Answer 13

I don’t think it’s fair to say they’re not “content” with their first born. That comes across as sounding like they’ve had enough with child number one, moving on to child number two….which I can assure you is not the mindset of many people.

I adore my son. I love him with all my heart. But I really do want another child. Do I love my first child any less because of that? h**l no! I would just love to see my husband and I have another child together. To me…having children is a great way of showing your love for one another. And as long as we’re financially okay to support a second child (which isn’t the case right now) then by all means, I would love for us to have a second child. My son would benefit from having another playmate but that’s far from the reason behind wanting a second child.

If you don’t want a second child because you’re satisfied with only one…by all means, stick with your one child. But some people just adore children and love having child after child. And if they love their kids and take care of them well, who am I to judge?

Answer 14

If the parents work a lot, the child may feel very lonely.  Also, another child allows the other child to get along on a different level forming a relationship that no parent can accomplish.  It is a great help especially later in life because siblings can trust eachother.  Many people as my self agree that 2 children are better than one for those reasons.  Plus the children usually get into less trouble.

Answer 15

Interesting question...

I think parents usually have so many different reasons for having multiple children that it's an oversimplification to say that it's just to give a child a sibling. Even when wanting to give a child a sibling is a large factor, there are often many other reasons that contribute to the decision.

Even independent of the other reasons, I don't know that wanting to give a child a sibling is any less valid of a reason for having a 2nd (or 3rd, or 8th...) child than any other reason is. You could make an argument that almost any reason for having a child is selfish or illogical or silly.

I mean, what are some of the reasons people usually want to have kids? ...To pass on their genes, to have someone to love or who loves them, to pass on their values or culture, because it's just expected in our society, to share life with, because they love kids...there are undoubtedly a million more possibilities.

Is there really any good reason why "to give a child a sibling" is a worse reason than any of those? If you think about it, some parents want a child to have a sibling so they will benefit from that sibling relationship, so they'll learn to share and cooperate, have a playmate and friend, have a close family member to go through life with, learn responsibility and caring by helping with the baby, and more. Those don't seem like such bad reasons.

On the other hand, undoubtedly some parents have more than one child because they're concerned about the reports that only children are selfish, have difficulty getting along with others, are lonely, etc. Maybe some of them are just scared into it. But isn't the source of that motivation really still the same? Just wanting to give their child the best experience in life?

I think it's an interesting question. I personally do not want more than one child. But I also don't think my reasons for wanting one child are any more or less valid than other people's reasons for wanting multiple children. If they're "not content with just one," I don't really have much to say about that. (Provided that they can support all the kids they choose to have, but that's a different debate!) JMHO :-)

Answer 16

That is a strictly personal option of an individual  - While you are content with your one someone else may have came from a big family and had a wonderful experience with their siblings  and just wont the same in her life as well.