Why are some women afraid to take risks?

Question

--when dealing with an abusive husband?

--when dealing with douche-bag boyfriends?

--when approaching finances?

i've seen this from the 3rd party perspective; (maybe) been there as the 1st party (the douche-bag); just wondering what they're thinking?

Answer 1

It's because love makes them blind to their boyfriend's/husband's bad behaviours.

Answer 2

I really don't know, it depends on the women & the environment she has been brought up in.

Answer 3

if elmer fudd dosent get best answer then you guys are nuts

Answer 4

they probably just don't have the self confidence to do that =/

Answer 5

sometimes people make bad choices and don't quickly realize there mistake.

    A better question would be to explore the differences in male and female reactions to fear, lack of self confidence in business or a bad relationship.

      Instead just another question with dubious insinuations.

Answer 6

The only area where I'm not comfortable in taking risks with are finances. The idea of possibly losing a lot of money doesn't appeal to me. Perhaps that's why I don't gamble.

Answer 7

its usually women with low self esteem that get into such situations

Answer 8

not wanting to make the same mistake again....  having the need to FEEL READY before getting into anything or before making a move.  I was in abusive relationship- socializing became foriegn to me, so for the longest I would avoid going to social gatherings. This frustrated family as I would always stay home and say, "I'm not ready. I don't want to put myself out there if I'm not ready. I want people to see me when I'm ready." Well thanks to God and preserverance, today, as of recently I've been saying "I'm ready." Simple as that. And these past two wks people have seen me who havnt seen me at family events in over 10 yrs. Its beautiful to be out again, and READY. =) There's still work to be done and still situations where I'm waiting to get that feeling that says, "ok, you can go!"  Hope this helps explain.

Answer 9

I have a friend whose ex beat her so badly she was unconscious for three days.  It's now almost a month later, and she still walks with a cane. He beat the h^ll out of her.

This sick guy is in jail, but will get out, and want another confrontation.  In the meantime will she move ?

Nope.

It's as if she feels she "has no choice" but to be there stuck with it. forever. -living in fear, waiting for it to happen.

Me, I'd be living in a state 2,000 miles away under cop protection.

But apparently he has her BELEIVING she cant go far enough that he wouldnt find her (so it's no good to run).

He has told her this all the way along, and she repeats it dutifully.

I cannot change her mind, and feel like I am watching someone helplessly as they pursue their misery and eventual suicide.

I don't know what to do.

______________________________

To answer your question I think this is what abuse has done to her (it started in childhood).

She only knows how to expect what she is conditioned to expect, and will subconsciously sabotage reality to make it meet her inner picture when she has to.

I learned this in psych long ago,  and just hashed over it last night no less with another ,more recent, psych major who disagreed.  She 'beleives'(I dont beleive in beleiving myself,I prefer the fact whatever it is--the "sides" game is pointless and not addressing reality)but...) that WE MAKE CHOICES.

No, I tried to explain, we are all sleepwalking to a dream we once had, rationalizing to keep it real ,defensible in our minds, and so going.

We are parrots, and sleepwalkers.

We dont really make choices at all.

...But we DO like to congratulate ourselves as if we do,

and to condemn others when we see opportunity to claim we are better chosers comparitively.

Answer 10

scared of history repeating itself

Answer 11

I was in the boat as douch-bag boyfirend, who also caused the fiance problem.  It took me about a year, but I finally wised up.  I ended up thanking my friends at the end for not butting in and letting me come to it myself.  They just only once in a while said you know that is not right.  But some may need more then that.  It is very hard to leave a mentally abusive man.