Why aren't women ever considered "cheap"?

Question

For instance, if a guy and girl go out on a date, and the guy wants to split the bill, he's seen as cheap. Why aren't women ever seen this way? Think about it: Who's usually pressured into buying Valentine's Day/Anniversary gifts? It's always men. I never hear guys saying, "God, she's so cheap; she didn't even offer to pay!" I wonder why that is. I'm a feminist, and I believe in equality, even if it means calling out my own gender on what I see as hypocritical behavior.

Answer 1

Because women usually don't have the money to pay anyway.

And if they do, they will intimidate guys and scare them away.

Answer 2

It's true: if you're a single guy and you want to go and date, it can be a heavy financial burden.  Granted, that's one of the things most women are looking for: financial security.  Some I'm sure would look at a situation where a guy can't afford to take her to Spago three dates in a row as not being successful enough.  Fair enough, if that's what you're looking for.

But a few times, it's come to a situation where a girl asks if I want to go out to dinner, chooses the restaurant (and I being somewhat a gentleman go there even though they have dismal vegetarian options), and then at the end, makes absolutely no motion whatsoever to help pay.  That says something to me: gold digger.  If we go out to a nice place and she orders the shrimp scampi, a Coke and two glasses of wine and chooses a fancy appetizer so the bill is now up to sixty bucks not including the tip, and has no intention of paying, what can I expect from the relationship?

I'm not cheap and happy to treat fairly often, but I was in a relationship where after a certain point, I felt like I was a 6'2, 190 lb ATM machine that had s*x as far as she was concerned, and I hated it.  When it becomes an expectation it's no longer fair; I work, you work, we work so that we can go and do things we enjoy and pay our bills, so it's not fair to assume and expect that I will always pick up the tab.

A couple of my female friends said that when they first moved to San Francisco and were broke, they would answer ads on Craigslist and ended up not having to pay for meals for two months.

Answer 3

why don't you ask your fellow feminists? this might not be you but feminists have made it so women don't pay for anything.

Answer 4

Depends on the woman.  I've asked plenty of guys out and paid.  I've also bought them gifts, even guys who are just my friends or co workers.  I think it has more to do with a society that perpetuates the "princess" image.  I - for one - am no princess, not in that way anyway.  

*I should mention that I am the queen though.  Just to be fair.

Answer 5

Because traditionally Men are suppose to be the provider.

Answer 6

Maybe because men take us on dates. We don't usually take them.

Answer 7

Most people still think it's the man's responsibility to pay for the dates.  You can extend this to other things, like opening doors (I hardly ever see girls do this for their boyfriends) for instance.  The thing is, most women AND men think it's supposed to be this way.  

Answer 8

I consider some women cheap, just like some guys. Work as a waitress and you'll find out that women don't tip as well as men. Granted, some women tip great (I do) and some men tip poorly, but unless things have changed dramatically, women tip less. It may be because they make less money, and maybe they tip guys badly just like they badly tip women, but it sucks to wait on people who don't appreciate your work.

I also pay my way for dates and buy presents for romantic holidays, since I see both as ways to show my appreciation for my partner. I think women who don't want to pay for that stuff are usually not feminists, and have old fashioned ideas about dating, and are therefore sexist. I don't see why people think they're a feminist if they aren't acting like one! I also run into guys who want to pay no matter what and it starts to look like a control thing, especially if they make less money than I do. On the other hand I've dated guys who were so cheap they wouldn't pay 50 cents for a soda for me, even when they made triple what I did. So there are plenty of cheap men, but I agree, there are scads of sexist and cheap women. Even if you make a pittance, you can pay for something, and you can always get a gift, since it shows you care.

But obviously, plenty of women are sexist and not feminists. Guess who the anti-fems on this site complain about the most too-the sexist non-feminists who won't pay for stuff for dates. Why don't they date a feminist, if they want a woman to act like one? Duh?  

Answer 9

Oh my God. Well here's a cheap woman for you. For my eigth birthday someone's mother gave me pairs of scissors. I mean, WHAAAT???? Did she want me to stab myself with the scissors? Run with them? No idea. But, it was probably the cheapest thing I've ever seen one do.

Answer 10

Well its a good question, but its just the way things go, and the way things have been for ages! I really couldnt say why...  

Answer 11

Reconsider that question, Women are frequently call "cheap tramps"

Answer 12

well personally I think men get down on eachother for being cheap more than women. most women wouldn't really mind paying if they are asked to pitch in but men fear they will be looked at as cheap if they don't pay for everything.historically it was this way because men were the ones that had jobs hence they were the ones with money to pay for things. since it has only been a few decades since women began having their own money, so things are still catching up. as for gifts, most of the couples I know exchange gifts on valentines day and birthdays and other such things. also wether its right or not, most men have more money than women. please don't start pointing out exceptions because they are the minority. because men get paid about 25 percent more to every womans dollar. so I think men aren't  seen as cheap because it is assumed that men have more money. I once tried to get the check on a date and the guy asked me if I thought he was poor(super embbarrasing). still ladies have money available to pay for your half, don't assume you won't have to pay and offer the get the bill once in a while. if we want to be equal lets start acting like it.

Answer 13

I know a lot of cheap women, Paris Hilton, Madonna, Lindsay Lohan. Being cheap is how they act, not what they decide to spend.