Why can't I achieve an o****m? ?

Question

My boyfriend uses his finger to stimulate my clitoris. I climax every time. But, once I get to the point where my body shakes involuntary, I ask him to stop, as if I am scared to get an o****m. What is wrong with me? Am I not mentally ready for it? (I am twenty years old) Does/did anyone else have/had the same problem? What can I do to become more relaxed? This is my first time by the way.

Answer 1

Well, it's a matter of that you probably don't like the involuntary shaking that occurs, and you don't want it to continue, fearing that the shaking will just become greater and greater.  So, you're not fearing the o****m.  Granted, this is coming from a guy's point of view and in the end it's your body and your decision, but pretty much, I would recommend just letting him continue stimulating you, and you may be almost there, but stop at the last second.  Again, it's your decision in the end, but let the shaking continue and let him continue to stimulate you.

Answer 2

Oh gosh yes I have the same problem.

Only mine has to do with the fact that I was sexually abused for years. When it was happening, I didnt allow myself to feel any pleasure from it. I had to fight it off, and basically made myself numb to it all.

But now I am with a wonderful and caring person, who loves me very much. s*x with him is absolutely great, but still, whenever he attempts to stimulate me, I will panic and make him stop before I come. I think it reverts back to my instinct from so many years of pain. Its definitely frustrating though.

Anyways, Im trying to get past that. Maybe something like this has happened to you? I dont mean to pry into your past or anything, its just something to think about. Good luck, I promise, you WILL eventually get there, and it feels great:)