Why can't I just let her go?

Question

short version: I'm in love with this girl, she loved me back, we went steady, she broke it off cuz of her mom, havent been together in a year, still friends, I'm freaking out.

I love her very much so. and we got into a deep conversation and I cried and told her I'm doing my best to let go of her and she cried and told me not to let go but if we are just friends why should I hold on to something that won't be.

I'm trying to just let go but It's crazy! I was just logging of going to dye my hair, then she logged on so now I'm talking to her instead of taking a shower, dying my hair, that sorta thing.. That happens a lot!

I do everything, and anything she asks me too. I just drop whatever it is I'm doing. and Cater to her. and I can't help it. I love doing it because it's out of my love for her.

but I keep getting hurt. hoping we get back together and it never happens...

how can I just let go to stop this vicious cycle of pain I'm trapped in?

Answer 1

omg i use to be the same with guys but to stop my self from getting hurt all the time i nver got attched to them meaning JUST TALK TO OTHER GUYS/GIRLS to get over it and there will be one person that will get you over her but DO NOT GET ATTCHED cuz then your going to be doing the same thing to yourself

Answer 2

Oh dear dear dear! I've so been there before, I'm sorry to say :( especially doing anything and everything for someone.

First of all, you need to somehow figure out if she does like you back (I'm not sure if you already know this, but if so, skip this part). If she DOES like you back but her mom is in the way, than you should probably be a little understanding. Depending on how old you are, parents opinions can matter a lot. At the same time, maybe you could keep the relationship secert, which isn't such a great idea, but I am such an advocate for being with someone if you love them and they love you. If she DOES like you but is confused, than be there to help her sort out her feelings. Being g*y can be tough, from experience I know, so having someone there to sort feelings out with is a huge help.

If she doesn't like you, she shouldn't be telling you not to let go. That's slefish of her! I know that doing things fro her makes you feel good, but it's eventually going to take a bad toll on you. It's very very hard, but you cannot let people take advantage of you like that. She may just want to feel loved even though she can't love you back, ya know?

If it comes to being her friend just won't work, then do what's best for you. Make YOU your first priority. If you think it would help you get over her to not talk to her, then don't talk to her.

Letting go is hard and usually unneccesary.

Answer 3

I'm in the same situation as you but just a bit different. We never dated at all. We were very best friends and it's been 4 years and I"m still in love with her. I tried everything and when I thought I got over her, and I got to see her and there we go, all the feelings just rushed back to me in that one second.

So you should be happy because at least you know you've had her. There are some people in love with the same person for years and never had a chance to be with them.  

Answer 4

tell her that when u and her r 2gether alone, be gf and gf again but when in front of mom, act like friends. if u love her as much as u say u do, dont give up

Answer 5

A lot of people ask this question and it seems none of them want to hear the answer. There is only one way to stop it.... just have to stop it.

Stop talking to her, don't see her, put some space and time between you.

TIME is the only way. There is no other way to get over it. You have to ignore her, block her IMs and e-mails and no texting and no phone calls and no meeting up.

You want the easy way out but there is none. You can't be with her and you can't keep on talking to her if you don't want to be in pain. You can either prolong the pain by talking to her or take it in one lump and get it over with and stop talking to/seeing her altogether until you are over her!

  

Answer 6

  You can never be just 'friends' with someone you feel so strongly

  about, you'd better start trying to give it up. You will be devastated

  when she finds someone else and breaks it all off suddenly and she

  will. You have become a door mat and she has lost respect for you.

       Feel The Pain and Get Over It.