Why did my crack addicted brother do this...?

Question

I went to go visit him for the first time today since August.

In August after the visitation, I wrote him a letter criticizing him harshly for the wrong and hurt he caused my family and I in the past.

He didn't respond to that one so I wrote him an apology.

Then he responded, but I didn't respond after that.

I went in to see him today in jail and they told me that

he took me off the list.

My mother and I finally chose to respond to him 2 weeks ago since I last did on August,

and he hasn't written back.

His release date is next month.

Why do you suppose he did this ?

Answer 1

Drug users are great manipulators. They are also great at denial.

"Why do you suppose he did this ?"  What? Was it because he took you off the visitation list, or didn't reply to your letter? Do you feel bad? Guilty? Ashamed about what you did? That maybe you hurt his feelings? That's drug user manipulation.

So what's the plan for next month? Will your brother live with you and Mom? Will you help him find a place to live, maybe give him some money?

Will he promise to stay clean? Will he break the promise but ask for "one more chance?" Will this happen again and again?

What was it like before he went to jail?

Answer 2

HE PROBABLY FEELS ASHAMED FOR ALL THE WRONG HE CAUSED YOU AND HIS FAMILY.  SO HE CANT FACE YOU RIGHT NOW.

Answer 3

Well, besides the fact that he is addicted to crack.... he's reckless. He doesn't care about you or your mom. He probably feels like he has nothing to live for.

Do your best to eventually forgive him in your life. Support his trying to get off this horrible drug.

Best of luck to you.

Answer 4

He probably wants his space.

Why did you write a letter criticizing his flaws?   You know people in prison can get counseling for self help.

Your letter is obviously making it difficult for him to express any thoughts of his wrong.  You should of sent him a positive letter.  Giving him hope & wishes him home soon for the best.

Answer 5

he can't deal with the pain he's caused

Answer 6

read kite runner

it's a story about

how people can hate

others they have wronged

out of a sense of guilt

and fear and pride

your brother harmed

his family by ending up in jail

he's having trouble facing you

but now is the time to support him

or else he'll end up there again

all the best

i hope it works out

http://www.odysseusepicmythhero.com

Answer 7

I work in a prison.  And sometimes you can only have a certain amount of visitor on your list.  Maybe he had other people he wanted to put on.  Or he could just be doing this for spite.  When people go in jail they have 24 hrs of nothing to do except think.  Dont give me the  benefit of the doubt.  Wait till he gets released and take it from there.

Answer 8

Keep this in mind, you already answered your own question "He's a crack head" We went through this also. You pointed out his deficiencies and, his problems. you didn't hug and coddle him and, feel sorry for him. This is probably what he expected of you, you disappointed him.

     Also keep in mind, because he's in prison doesn't mean he's cured or, healthy again. He probably can't wait to get out to "get a fix" we've been through this also.

     Be careful, when he gets out, he'll come around if your last on the list to "find help" and lie, cheat and steal from you, then "he's sorry" I've seen it all and, have no more time for "them" they are their worst enemies.

     The biggest help you can give them is help in getting into a "program" to cure them.

Answer 9

It's really hard having to deal with something like this. Your brother probably felt weird when you sent him that letter. He probably felt embarrassed. Don't get me wrong, you didn't do anything to cause this. He probably feels ashamed for this entire situation. And I bet he feels sorry for you and your family. I think he feels like a bad person for causing this problem. Try to understand that. He's your brother, he still loves you and your family.

Answer 10

Because he's a crackhead and he didn't appreciate you telling him what he already knows.