Why did my mother taking me out of the school system when I was 6 years old and homeschooling me make me shy?

Question

She put me in kindergarten because 1st grade was way too difficult. I was never shy in my kindergarten class; I always talked when I wasn't supposing to and sometimes bothered people. When she put me in a day camp when I was 7 years old, I was slightly shy and the shyness seems to have progressed throughout my life and have become more severe with every passing year.

Answer 1

If you want to know the real reason why she did it you'll have to ask her..I am 17 years old and when I was 10 my mom to me out of public schools and homeschooled me as well..I was mad about it for the next 6 years but just this past year I realized it only as good as you make it..I wouldn't blame homeschooling for making you shy I believe that's a choice..as for your mother she just thought she was doing the right thing

Answer 2

How do you know it made you shy?  It sounds like you were shy from the start, that it's your temperament.  Homeschooling doesn't "make" people shy, any more than classrooms make them social.  People are who they are.

If you want to get over your shyness, you need to stop blaming your mother and decide to do it.  It will be difficult - it always is difficult to go against your inherent temperament - but it's no one's fault.  It just is what it is.  Decide to go into social situations, even if they might be intimidating, and you will find that little by little, your shyness will fade.

You're shy because you've allowed yourself to retreat into it, not because your mother homeschooled you.

Answer 3

Extremely shy kids have a much, much harder time in the school system.  Could you imagine attending a high school of 1500 students at the age of 14?  What about making presentations in a classroom of 30?  What about asking a "dumb" question?  How about coming up to bat in front of two gym classes?

Thank you mom. She sacrificed a lot to homeschool you and saved you from many anxiety attacks.

Answer 4

Shyness doesn't necessarily have anything to do with homeschooling.

I was shy throughout all my school years; got worse the older I got, actually. I was never homeschooled. So, you see, your shyness may have nothing to do with being homeschooled.

Homeschooling itself doesn't make people shy. If you don't ever do anything with others, then it's understandable how you could be shy. But homeschooling doesn't, and shouldn't, mean that you never do things with others. And I know plenty of out-going, not shy homeschoolers.

Answer 5

I was shy all through primary and secondary public school. It had nothing to do with my mom's decision on how I was to be educated.

I blossomed in college because I simply made my mind up to get over it.

Now I have completely gone the other direction and I love and will talk to anybody in any setting.  I get energized by being around people.

I have a little bit of experience with social anxiety.  The only way to get over it is to make yourself / put yourself in situations that are social.  Make yourself talk to others.  Initiate conversations and so on.  It may be hard at first but if you keep at it you will become more comfortable with just being yourself and not worry about what others might think.

You can change this for yourself if you want to.  It doesn't matter who or what is to blame.  What you have is today and tomorrow and you get to choose what to do with both.

Choose wisely.

Answer 6

Why don't you just ask her?

Answer 7

I don't think your shyness has anything to do with being homeschooled.   Homeschooling does not make people shy anymore than public school would make them shy.

You need to find another reason for your shyness or better yet, find a way to overcome your shyness.

It can be done.

You can blame your mom or you can find a way to correct what you consider to be a negative character trait.

It would be more productive to find a way to be more outgoing.

Answer 8

'Shyness' has a very large genetic component. In fact, there was a very intersting study a year or two ago on the shyness gene (yes, a real testable thing). While parenting (or other environmental factors) can help to overcome it, it is not a good idea to blame your shyness on homeschooling. You may simply be predisposed to shyness, no matter what your environment. And thinking that school would have helped is problematic; I was an outgoing kid until about 5 years old, then got very shy. By the time I was in 4th grade, I was painfully shy and then, a target for teasing.

Answer 9

I went to public school all my life and am super shy, so maybe that is just who you are?

Answer 10

Well public school is the devil. home school is so much better that is why

Answer 11

This has nothing to do with your mother pulling you out of school.  It's all about you.  Over the years, you've come to fear interaction with people you don't know and trust.  

You just need to move past this slowly.  I understand it can be hard, but after a few outgoing experiences, you won't even remember why you were shy.

Answer 12

I'm not sure. I have seven homeschooled kids, and only one could be accounted as shy. It couldn't have been the homeschooling, or all seven would be shy. I know dozens of homeschoolers, some are shy. I know hundreds of public schooled kids, who are shy. That's a natural attribute for humans, just as much as being gregarious.

It is possible that you were not naturally outgoing in kindergarden. If you do remember correctly that you were, it could have been nervousness masking itself as gregariousness. It's possible that without practice, as you hit puberty, that the natural insecurity that comes with hormones began to manifest itself as shyness.

Either way, you have control of your life. You can choose to become isolated and allow your shyness to control you, or you can push your boundaries and get out and find new people. But there is nothing wrong with not being the life of the party. Most of us aren't. It's much healthier to have a few really great friends, rather than dozens of acquaintances and no one you could count on.

Good luck

Answer 13

She is over protective, my Wife took her daughter out of high school and home schooled her too. Now her daughter is 21 with a 2 year old daughter,doing drugs, and not working. My theory is, she is trying too hard to live her social life in a short period of time. My wife's son is 23 and lazy, he is a gamer and seldom leaves his Uncles house to do anything but go to work and come home, close himself up in the bedroom and game. She stifled their social skills by being so over protective.

Answer 14

Well, you should have done something more during your childhood than just go to camp once!  I was homeschooled but I was always involved in something (sports, youth groups, scouts, lessons, homeschool group, etc).  Now granted, I am still a bit on the shy side, but I think that's just part of my personality.  Some people are more extroverted than others.  But it's not like I have social anxiety or anything.

I'm sorry that you have a problem with shyness, but please don't blame it on homeschooling.  There are plenty of homeschoolers who are not shy at all (I know at least one homeschooler who never shuts up!)  I hope you can still overcome your shyness.  Just get out there and get involved and talk to people!

Answer 15

You are assuming causation from correlation.

You were homeschooled

You are shy

You know when skirt hem lengths have gotten shorter, the value of gold has dropped. Does that mean mini skirts cause gold to devalue?

The two may not be linked. If your mom tried to put you in day camps and other activities and you resisted interaction with others, you may have been shy first and simply never changed. It is possible that you'd have remained an introvert regardless of you education. I know plenty of shy people who attended public schools. Maybe HS was a factor. You can ponder that forever and it won't change a thing today, I'm sorry to say. The good news is that you are an adult and you have dominion over your life. Each breath is a new life. Today may be the day you take the first steps toward being a social butterfly! Best wishes and brightest blessings to you on your journey.

Answer 16

Im sorry, but your argument just isnt logical.  I was public/private school educated and have ALWAYS been really shy, in fact I have huge problems with it.  My daughter is homeschooled and is really, really outgoing and has great social skills.  Shyness and a lack of social skills have nothing to do with where you are educated.  I put my lack of confidence down to the years and years of bullying I suffered whilst attending school.