Why do I hate being married?

Question

Right this minute I feel like calling it quits. The problem is, I don't have the courage to do it because he's not abusive,physically or emotionally. I've been married for 8 years, but I feel like I just want to be left alone (sometimes). One of the main problems is that he's very boring. I know this a totally ridiculous mild situation of ours, but nothing has changed these years! I am always the one to initiate things to do or where to go. He's not at all romantic. Of the 8yrs we've been married he's never once washed the dishes ( I understand, it's not his obligation to wash the dishes because I am after all a homemaker). Actually I shouldn't be complaining about the dishes because he does help around the house once in a while. What I am trying to say is maybe I am perhaps falling out of love. It sucks I know. I don't know what my problem is. I know I can be such a selfish bi** sometimes. And that's how I feel right now. I am so confused.

I'll suggest we go to a movie, well it ain't gonna happen because he doesn't understand english. We both speak spanish though. I am never in the mood to have s*x ( with him). And what is so Ironic about this is that I was a virgin before we got married. There is so much more I want to write but I am sure I will bore you guys with my drama IF I haven't already done so. I am pretty much in this marriage for the sake of my kids.

Answer 1

Have you thought about Marriage Encounter?  It is through the Catholic Church.  Maybe you married too young and are frustrated.  If he is using the old latin macho act I can't blame you for being pissed off at him.  I am part spanisn and on my mom's side of the family I have seen alot of that attitude. It is not as bad with the newer generations though.  The reason why Marriage Encounter might help it is because I have known Spanish speaking couples that had the same problem too and it did help.  Hopefully you have a good job as a back up in case you have to make a drastic choice.  Your kids will suffer if two parents hate each other.  I hope things work out for you and your family.

Answer 2

I think u married the wrong guy, and staying 2gether 4 the kids is a big mistake.  The longer u stay like that the worse it will get.  By the way it's not only your responsibility to do the house work, he should help too.  Well that's my opinion any way.

Answer 3

Well hon, since you have kids you should at least try to work things out with your husband.  You need to talk with him about your feelings and probably get counseling and do your best to keep your family together.

If it's impossible, or if he refuses to make any effort then you might as well call it quits.  You're not going to get happier and neither is he.

But first try to work it out.  Try to recapture the reasons you got married.

Best of luck.  It's a tough situation.

Answer 4

sometimes, a lot of the time, i hate being married too.  if you're just bored with your hubbie  maybe there are things you can do to get him off the couch & active in your life.  

maybe you guys are speaking different languages!  try this book, maybe it will help understand him & yourself better.

the five love languages by gary chapman

good luck!  

Answer 5

mmm.....good one.....do stuff with out him! if he wants to leave you because you do not include him then so what. let him watch the kids while you go & see a movie then?!!!

Answer 6

you are bored and have no excitement in your life.  He is probably tired from a hard days work.  Why don't you ask someone to watch your children for a day and you and your husband go out and have some fun.  

Answer 7

Yeah he sounds borrrring, but do you LOVE him ? I don't know...you should tell him how your feeling, and see what he says and feels too!

BUT yeah a  borrrring marriage can suck lol I don't blame you!