Why do I keep getting into abusive relationships?

Question

My therapist pointed out the common factor in my relationships is how selfish, controlling and abusive all the men have been. It's easy to see it now that she pointed it out, but why do I do this? She gave me her thoughts on why but I am curious to hear what you think.

Answer 1

i do the same thing.  we are still trying to fix the abusive relationship, by being with someone similar.  we keep hoping it will change, but it does not. we are drawn to what we are familiar with and used to, even if it was abuse.  it will continue until one breaks the pattern of doing such.  we must realize we deserve better.  being so abuse as a child creates within us a mentality that we don't deserve better.  it is a result of the abuse even if it is not totally conscious.  

Answer 2

I would have to think you were brought up in an abusive household; probably had an abusive father.

Answer 3

Any change is scary. Keep talking to your therapist and seek out other types of men. You know what is attracting you now, so avoid those types of men.