Why do I let other people make me feel bad?

Question

Why do women talk about me when they don't even know me? Why do they try to butt in to my personal business and try to make something out of nothing? How can I defend myself against my neighbors who I don't talk to but who obviously talk about me? I keep to myself, I take care of my kids and my home, I have a full time job and yet I am the topic of conversation on my street. I hate it. I have a neighbor who doesn't like the fact that my kids are home alone... all of 3 hours a day. I go to work early and my husband goes in late so that they aren't home very long. We've been doing this on and off all summer, sometimes they stay with family or friends when possible. Anyway, my kids are fine, we have a camera set up in our home so that we can watch them from work. But one of my neighbors has made it clear that she "knows they're home alone." They are not in any danger and are capable of taking care of themselves, we live in a good neighborhood, lots of families like us. I am not very good at defending myself, I tend to just ignore it but that really isn't helping either.

Answer 1

Are  any of your kids over 13? Well legally one of them would be considered a baby sister if one of them is, so just let them know that you pay the oldest one to look after the others in a polite way, they obviously don’t have enough drama in their life so they want to make you a part of this obnoxious drama they pheen for, just be civil and go about your business if you show any sign of drama they will just feed off of it.  

Answer 2

suck it up you wimp, God!!! whats with all of the drama???

Answer 3

Not you feel bad it no you are happy all day time summer you can get lot fun made you are happy it.

Answer 4

First lesson you have to learn in life is that you have no control over what other people are going to say or think. So try and learn not to worry about things you have no control over. I'm not saying you have to like whats going on. but it helps to keep telling yourself you have no control over it and theres really nothing you can do about what other people think. NOW the more important question is  how old are your kids? If their in the teens then I don't see why you can't leave them either. But if their younger then you may want to consider doing what your doing by leaving them alone. But I don't know what your circumstances may be. If you and your husband and kids are happy, then thats all that matters. Just ignore the rest. You can't please evryone!!!!  Good luck  and only worry about the things you can control.

Answer 5

People will always try to get into your business and push their morals or beliefs on you.  It has nothing to do with you, and everything to do with those people trying to find flaws in others so they feel better about the ones they see in themselves.  How old are your kids?  If they're very young, I can see the neighbors being concerned.  However, if they're older, no big deal.  Sometimes avoidance is the best answer, but that's probably hard with your neighbor.  The best way to deal with nosy, pushy neighbors is to politely yet firmly tell them that while you appreciate her concern (it's a lie, but that's ok lol), you and your husband very proud of teaching your children independence and responsibility, and that you trust them to do the right thing while at home.  Keep repeating that sentence if she persists.

Answer 6

Who loves you?

Does your husband?

Does your family?

Do your friends?

Why not focus on the good things you have, rather than the naysayers that want to drag you down to their pathetic level?

How old are your kids that are home alone?  Some places have age restrictions on how old a child can be without adult supervision, and you could actually get in trouble with the authorities.

Have the eldest enroll in a babysitting class, (yes, these are available now), quit talking to your nosy neighbor.

Because others are doing the same isn't a defense, make sure you are covered.

You can't control what is said about you, all you can do is control your behavior, so that nothing negative that's said about you is true

Luck

Answer 7

the rules of gossips--

if u gossip, its so much fun.

if u are gossiped, its no fun at all.

i would say u can gossip about people who are gossiping about u! it seems like u have lots of family friends who like u, so u can tell them about ur feelings and let the steam out. and gossip back!

i think paris hilton said, "when everybody is talking about u, thats when u kno u are the best"  people are jealous of ur career, status, life. let them gossip!  

Answer 8

hi there,

people by nature love to talk(either good or bad) so thats a part of life. it would be wise for you to just ignore them. you don't have to do anything or prove anything to them. the reason why youre so much in the news is most prolly because they don't like you and get good times in talking ill of you. stay away from them. stop worryint about people who don't worry about you.